Girls, my mom won't let me shave... What do I do?

[Anonymous]

I have a very light skin colour and dark, thick hair on both my arms and legs. As it is summertime, I have to wear shorts and a t-shirt during Gym in school, but I can't, because I'm too embarrassed of myself and my "hair". The worst thing is, my mom won't understand. She doesn't let me shave because a) she thinks it's "s1utty", and b) she says that I don't need to shave, because "no one will notice my hair if I ignore it". Once, I was changing out for Gym and one of my REALLY close friends said: "Wow, girl, you're hairy. Like, I mean, you HAVE to shave. That hair is just gross." And my other friends say it too. I just feel so horrible that my mom won't understand my pain about my "hairy appearance". She started shaving when she was 25, but she was blonde, (and had light body hair) and she had WAY less body hair than I have. Please help!
P. s. I don't really want to shave behind her back, because since I'm wearing shorts AT HOME ONLY, she will notice my shaved legs, as well as my shaved arms, since I wear t-shirts at home, too.
P. s. s. Does your shaved hair REALLY gow back thicker and darker? Because my mom is convinced that it does, and that's another reason why she won't let me shave my leg & arm hair.
Thank you in advance.

Updates

+1 y

Forgot to mention one more thing. Whenever my mom and I go shopping together, she will always show me the t-shirts and the dresses that she likes. When I say "Mama, I can't wear that, I'm hairy...", she just rolls her eyes and gives me a 3 hour lecture, as usual. I feel like everyone is starring at me when I wear shorts and t-shirts, and I feel so embarrassed of my body. My mom just won't understand.

[GirlScoutsRevenge]

Dom t shave your arms, your friends are idiots. Real friends do not make each other feel bad, they should be the ones making you feel good.

I'd recommend lightening your arm hair, stubbly arms are not sexy or appealing. As for your legs... well shaving doesn't make it thicker or darker, it looks that way because the hair has been cut, a tapered hair looks finer. When you shave you cut that hair straight and it looks darker and thicker when actually it isn't. Look this up online and go speak to your mom. Does she let you shave your armpits? Shaved armpits will smell less and as a teen that's important.

Go do some research on the legs and then talk to her again. The arm thing I agree with her, don't shave it. You will be doing it forever if you do. Just see about bleaching it with a body hair lightener.

[Asker]

I tried bleaching my arm hair with lemon juice, but it's still pretty dark.
Thanks a lot, though, I really appreciate your advice.

[GirlScoutsRevenge]

Use a proper hair lightening kit, they really aren't expensive at all. I strongly advise you don't shave your arms, seriously, people are able to see them all the time and they will get touched. Stubble on arms would be far worse than a bit of hair.

[iamasquirrel]

My mom told me the same thing when I started feeling it was time to shave. Glad I didn't follow her advice and didn't look like a monkey throughout all my teenage years. Sometimes we just gotta do what makes us feel better regardless of what others say, as long as it won't harm ourselves or others. Shaving won't harm you in the slightest (unless you cut yourself, of course - so take your time and be careful). When she finds out, apologize to her and try to make her listen to you, for once. Life is so complicated already, why add stuff like body hair to that list and make it even harder? I hope you do well and good luck :)

[Asker]

Thank you so much! 😘 I was just wondering if i DO shave it behind my mom's back, and if she gets mad, what should I tell her?

[iamasquirrel]

No problem :) Well, you gotta be prepared for her to get mad. But think about it: what could she possibly do? go get the hairs and glue them to your arms and legs? ;) she'll get over it eventually, and realize she won't be able to control what you do to your own body.

[Asker]

Thanks again! I'll try my best to convince her that it's okay for me to shave if she notices my shaved legs. 😉

[iamasquirrel]

I hope it'll be fine! I'm glad you found my answer to be the most helpful :) if you get the chance, update me on how it went after she finds out ;)

[cinderelli]

that is not true that hair grow back thicker.. and i know it is embarrassing.. try to explain it to her.. and she can ask a doctor about this too.. i asked 3 doctors and everyone said this is not true that hair grow back thicker.. u r not doing it for boys.. u are doing for yourself.. :) best of luck..

[Asker]

Thank you! 😘

[cinderelli]

you are welcome sweetie.. i went through this soo i know how it feels.. :)

[Tomboy4life03]

Get bait it's hair removal or get it wakes I did that since I was 8 and now I'm 13 so now I shave cause my dads letting me and I hope u don't mind me asking but does your mom shave if so than she is a little slutty no offense

[Ally-cat]

Ok, so...
1. that's a myth, it grows back the same
2. it's your choice. If it's making you feel bad you should shave.
3. It's not slutty in the slightest
4. 25 is quite ridiculous. I started shaving at 13 (light blonde hair, not a slut)

This is one of those times where it sounds like it's better to ask forgiveness than permission

[Asker]

Thank you, and I know, my mom is very strict. But she started shaving at 25, because she didn't even have that much hair. I, on the other hand, am hairier than most of the guys in my grade.