Does reading a book make you look unapproachable?

Question

Do you think people avoid conversation with you when you are reading? Are you less inclined to talk when you're in a good book? Do you refrain from addressing someone when they are reading a book or kindle?

Quintessence · Accepted Answer

Do people avoid conversation with me when I'm reading? Nope. I've been approached while reading a book.

Am I less inclined to talk when I'm reading? Nope. I'm a bookworm. When I'm reading, I'm in my element, which means I'm comfortable, which means I'm less likely to feel anxious when approached by strangers. In fact, out of all the ways to be approached, getting asked about a book I'm reading is one of my most preferable, because A) it gives us something to talk about from the get-go, rather than straining to think of topics, B) it's a better substitute for small-talk, C) it's something I'm interested in and I can therefore contribute more to the conversation, D) it allows the conversation to develop into something deeper or branch into something else--e. g., going from the book I'm reading to other similar books to literature in general to philosophy, etc.

Do I refrain from talking to someone when they are reading? That depends on what they're reading. If it's Fifty Shades of Grey or Gossip Girl, I probably won't approach them. If it's one of the classics or something from an author I'm familiar with, I'm more likely to strike up a conversation.

btbc92 · Accepted Answer

I doubt it. I only say that because it really depends on how much 'guts' people really have. I just get really aggravated with such people who don't approach me when it's important. Other than that, if it helps prevent people from asking me out, I would bring a book more often. But yes, many things prevent people from wanting to approach you. Always making excuses why they can't. Other than that, if I need or want something, I go speak to them and politely ask them if they are busy. If yes, I make it quick or leave. If no, I get straight to the point. Even if I don't feel like talking, I am always polite to stop what I am doing to give that person my undivided attention.

Chantel77 · Accepted Answer

I hope not caz that's what i do a lot while out on public transportation. I thought me laughing at what I'm reading is approachable since I make different facial expressions.

When I see a good looking guy reading I see it as my ice breaker to say "What book are you reading?". Even if they go back into intensely reading, I can say "thanks, I'll have to check it out. You look so into it so I had to ask, sorry if I disturbed/bothered you.

Sadly I hardly ever see any guys reading a book while I'm out on the train or bus. One guy was but it was crowded so I chickened out but I did enjoy staring at him. I never saw him again but gosh he was just my type!!

Solanaceae · Accepted Answer

I'm always reading. One time my best friend told me when she first met me, she was about to go up to me and introduce herself, but then I was reading, and I looked 'intimidating', so she left me alone. Apparently she sat next to me one time and I didn't even know it haha <3 I hear I'm very intimidating to approach in general, and I guess more so when I'm reading (99% of the time).

NearlyNapping · Accepted Answer

I go out to eat a lot by myself and I almost always have a book with me. It's pretty obvious that many servers avoid saying anything when I'm reading. I'd guess about half do that.

I wish they wouldn't do that though. I'm just fine if they interrupt to ask if I need anything, or to just chat. If I wanted to be isolated and not talk, I wouldn't be out in a public place with dozens of people all around me.

In the other direction, if I had something to say to someone who was reading, I'd say it. I just can't imagine that bothering anyone.

Bas96 · Accepted Answer

I mostly travel to school by train, an there are a lot of people who read books on the train. (mostly students of my age) It looks like they don't want to talk, but mostly they just want to hide themselves, and travel to fictional worlds instead of staring at people constantly. I mostly put some music on, and that is mostly considered a way of showing that you don't want to talk. It's a bit sad that's the same way with reading a real book.

that-panda · Answer

Reading a book can actually be a good opener for people to talk, weather they want to know what your reading, if they read the same book and want to tell you about their experience and opinion with the book, or a great time to drop a corny pick up line 👍

ciitruskiwi · Answer

I'd talk to someone if they talk to me while reading but secretly I'd be wishing for them to stop so I can get back to reading. I'm just not a rude person to say "excuse me can't you see that I'm reading?"

The most I'd want to talk to people while they're reading is to ask them how the book is but I don't want to bother them.

UncleRayRay · Answer

You are still technically approachable, however I think most people would see that it is an imposition on somebody to interrupt them while they are reading. Therefore, I do not suggest reading a book in public as a means to meet new people or have new people approach you

BlackViking357 · Answer

This goes along with the question like "Does playing with your phone make you look unapproachable?" Because you know there are people that will use their phones as shields so they do not have to talk to anyone. Same goes for books, newspapers, and etc. But, can it make you approachable? Of course. However, the person that sees you fondling with an object most likely would consider you as busy. That can be changed if you greet them while you are doing something or they greet you. It depends.

oddwaffle · Answer

Yes. I don't want to be interrupted when:

Bad Guy: Muwahaha. You think you have won huh? A mere assassin can kill a king but he can never disrupt the King's plan!!! I still have an Ace in the Hole!

Good Guy: No! It can't be!

Bad Guy: muwahaha! Tak...

Random girl: Hi! Would you [insert attempt at conversation here].

zazuun · Answer

Yeah If he is reading that means he is busy and I would not interrupt unless I need help or something  When I read , I don't like being interrupted either

Aalila · Answer

Yes to be honest if I'm into a really damn good book i don't want to be approached i get easily distracted and lose track of where I was and end up frustrated trying to find where I left off

mystintri · Answer

I've had more dynamic conversations with people who were reading than not reading.

If it's about a topic that I am passionate about, they love to talk about it, I love to hear about it, and in turn - ask them stimulating questions.

It's a quality over quantity deal.

Most people wouldn't want to disturb, can think you're shy, boring, too smart, etc.

Ashley_Claire · Answer

Who interrupts book readers? All of you are monsters! 😂

Ambassador_from_Mars · Answer

Any activity which you do with great concentration will give the signal of you being busy doing some stuff, probably more important than whatever the the approaching person has in mind.

So reading a book can make you unapproachable, depending on how you read it. #BodyLanguage

Maddiisnotintresting · Answer

if I'm reading and you interrupt me there is a negative twelve chance that you will be getting anything other than me telling you to go away.

azzntittiz · Answer

I learned from my last relationship that if you see someone reading a book, don't approach them, they will tell you all about it.

ryslostthought · Answer

Any respectable person would leave you to your book, save for needed conversation ("hey there's a fire!") or to ask due to interest ("I've heard/curious of ____, what do you think of it?")

Jinxx2196 · Answer

personally i made a few friends by coming up to me and asking what i was reading, is it any good, etc. and I've approached a lot of people while reading because they seem intriguing.

jammy85 · Answer

I wouldn't say unapproachable. Being a reader myself, I wouldn't want to disturb you. I've spoken to people in the past when their reading or I've been reading, it's a good conversation starter

Lavinnykins · Answer

Being someone who reads books myself, I'd be quite happy for someone to approach me... and likewise, I'd approach someone reading a book, even more so if the topic of conversation was about said book.

RJGraveyTrain · Answer

I think it does. I don't like being interrupted when I'm reading, so I'd never do so to someone else.

JenSCDC · Answer

No, if anything it's a great conversation starter. I actually enjoy it when people interrupt me when I'm reading to ask me about the book!

BaileyisDarcy · Answer

It's when people are on their phones that they're unapproachable.

EequalzMCsquared · Answer

Maybe not so much "unapproachable" as it would be someone I wouldn't want to disturb, because I understand how you can get lost in a good book.

sassygirl13 · Answer

I focus so much while reading that don't hear or notice anything around me. Basically you need to nudge me LOL  So yes unapproachable

Renzo11 · Answer

Yes. For me it makes you unapproachable. you're reading because you want to get lost in a world, so you're busy enjoying something. Unless its clearly a academic book for studying, i dont approach women who read. I feel very intrusive

SarahsSummer · Answer

If there are two people sitting somewhere and you are equally interested in talking to them, 9 times out of 10 you'll approach the person not already engaged in something else.

Phoenix98 · Answer

Yeah kind of I mean when you see someone reading a book your first thought is they look invested in what they're reading I don't want to be rude and interrupt them.

But I mean there are people who will approach you anyway.

NyomiMcClinton · Answer

Yes, a guy will not approach you because your head will be down in the book. But a confident guy will still go after you. He may ask what type of book you are reading to get something going.

normalice · Answer

probably not. I have a long walk to campus, and have taken up reading while walking. The same number of girl approach me after I started reading while walking as did before I started doing it (zero).

HungLikeAHorsefly · Answer

Nah. I do a thing where I'll roll up into a bar with a book and read by myself. It's amazing how many people stop and ask me about it.

19magic · Answer

If I'm into a good book I'm unaware of my surroundings and unintentionally blank them. If I see someone else reading a book I don't talk to them finding something else to do instead

ATuairiscean · Answer

I love people that read but you make a good point, would I interrupt them no but if they stopped I might ask them about it, if they or the book interests me.

kikippoki · Answer

I love reading so I'll try to approach and talk about books bc it'll be easier to start a conversation

Loon309 · Answer

I find it extremely rude to talk to someone who's trying to read. If I wanted to socialize I wouldn't have brought a book. I assume others have the same basic comprehension of obvious shit.

emad1374 · Answer

I don't care what people says about me reading books make me live in another dimension and I love my life

ruffik · Answer

Depends on whether you are totally in the book, or sometimes raise your head to look around and seems to be not as occupied

TheAmbernator · Answer

Not at all. In fact it should make you more approachable because you should have appear to have more knowledge and are easy to talk to.

JamesIsNotEdgy · Answer

Yeah, of course. Most people with at least a little respect will leave you alone when you're reading because they assume the idea that you're concentrating.

DriverSolus · Answer

depends on the book. Is it How to meet people or the Necronomicon? that would make a big difference to me.

Kitten967 · Answer

I think people Do, yeah I'm less inclined to talk if in Reading, I try not to talk to other people if they are reading

Finni · Answer

Well I wouldn't try talking to someone who is reading at the moment, because I think he is probably annoyed by that because I interrupt the story. But if I just know that this person reads a book now and then, thats fine

Incontrair · Answer

No, it doesn't. In a social environment, someone reading a book in the corner of the room always looks off-putting.

erich1953 · Answer

Now when someone reads a book, he concentrates on it. When someone has headphones on, he concentrates on what he hears. Some people ignore this

MackFreeze · Answer

I find it more inviting while ear buds is a huge turn away

itwasmelaniasfault · Answer

No, apperantly not. I've been approached multiple times while reading.

ThePetSquirrel · Answer

Yeah, pretty obvious actually. I abhor interruptions when I'm reading. If I'm holding something in front of my face, then that should be a very overt indication that I don't want to talk right then.

demonics · Answer

If you want people to bother the shit out of you, speak at 100db to people sitting next to them, or eat the LOUDEST potato chips on Earth, pull out a book.

phaggot · Answer

Every time i've walked up to talk to someone who's reading, the reply i got was "can't you see im reading?" Basically if i see someone with a book i am in no hurry to be told to fuck off

BackAgain · Answer

A bit yes, i don't want to bother them. They could be studying for all i know

KitnKat · Answer

Unless its to ask them about the book I try to avoid interrupting their reading time ^-^

Euph0ria · Answer

There's something about someone immersed in a book that says, "Can't you see I'm trying to read? Leave me alone!" :D

shadow1332 · Answer

Seemingly not. It's one of those times when people wants to talk to you. Same with having ear phones in. Fucking annoying

TJDanger · Answer

They don't have anything blocking their hearing, so it's much easier to approach than someone wearing headphones

JesseEllyson · Answer

I certainly hope I'm unapproachable when I'm reading. I mean, hell, I'm reading ! Leave me alone!

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

If i saw a girl reading a book at the library I'm less likely to approach her i would sit down and hope she may crop of a conversation.

Keenisha · Answer

Depends on if they look like the book type that enjoys discussing it... like a book club type of person

DefinitelySane · Answer

I would hope it makes me look unapproachable. I don't want to be interrupted.

Mishthefish · Answer

The right people will approach you ,, people who you will have more in common with>> the readers.

Stuart_Pots_is_cool · Answer

Yes, there's a reason I bring books to public places. People won't bug you if you look like your attention is on something already

pingiluv · Answer

Yeah usually I never bother people when they are reading lol

Aguamarina · Answer

It would make you unapproachable to people who don't bother with people who are reading. I was approached when I had my head phones on...

Nihilego · Answer

Personally, if I see a woman engaged in a book, I avoid bothering her.

ASEXY · Answer

I'm starting to believe nothing makes me look unapproachable... I personally would refrain from talking to someone when they're reading a book.

Does reading a book make you look unapproachable?

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