Promiscuity or death? Which one would you choose?

[Mia-Wallace]

I can only imagine myself becoming promiscuous as an ultimate method of self-harm before I drink a deadly dose of Pentobarbital, so I will choose to simply end my suffering sooner. I had chances of becoming promiscuous in my life and it was really the fear of death (or rather dying alone in meaninglessness) that always kept me back.

I really hate the idea of dying alone, however. My dream is to die in someone's arms and feel safe as I pass. Before I go, I might find someone to act as my partner - kiss me, make love to me, then cuddle me or just hold my hand as I pass. I think that would be a possible scenario in Switzerland and what I would go for if I had to choose between promiscuity and death.

I ask this because I can't see myelf being promiscuous and mentally healthy, functional, and living a meaningful life at the same time.

Can you? How?

Promiscuity

Death

Updates

1 y

I consider promiscuity a form of self-harm.

When I say I choose "death", I'm choosing between a life of self-harm and death, not between "sex and fun" and death. I don't consider promiscuous/casual sex "fun" at all. I don't get aroused without having a strong emotional connection with a person.

Updates

1 y

I also don't prefer staying alive "no matter what". If my life is meaningless and I am having sex just to get high *while* being high and intoxicated, I'd rather die sooner than later.

I prefer fighting for an ideal over death, but death over living hell.

Can't understand how people don't take promiscuity seriously.

[RealMarek]

Death. If my back is against the wall with that sort of ultimatum, caving in and compromising myself will only lead to more ultimatums.

[Berethor]

Promiscuity is bad but I am a man, so people would not be calling me a ho for that.

[Berethor]

As for the updates, girl you take your question too seriously, it's a false dichotomy anyway, who would put you before that choice in real life? also so far most girls here choose death over dishonor, ever being a ho, but you really expected guys to choose death? a man is like a key, a woman is like a lock. Promiscuity is bad, but death is also not exactly a good thing. You can die from STDs, but if you die anyway it don't matter that much.

[Mia-Wallace]

I don't really take it THAT seriously. It's a hypothetical question.

I'm realky just saying promiscuity is not as simple as people think it is. It's a lot like drug addiction. My husband used to be promiscuous. He knows. I have a promiscuous friend and I can see how her choices is affecting her life. She knew, but went that way anyway.

[Berethor]

So you married former promiscuous man and have a promiscuous friend yet you think that death is better? would you prefer that your husband and your friend was dead? you should not take death so lightly, death is a very bad thing, only few things are fate worse than death, I don't think that promiscuity is one of them, even though to me if a woman is/was promiscuous is a dealbreaker, as I don't trust promiscuous women. By the way are you damisexual or something? as you can't get aroused without having a strong emotional connection.

[Mia-Wallace]

Yes. My husband always says he would probably end up with an STD and have a miserable life. He was, in a way, killing himself by being promiscuous. My friend is also having troubles. I don't wish she was dead, not at all, but her suffering is becoming greater as she ages. I'm actually concerned she would end up committing suicide. If she feared promiscuity like she feared death when we were teenagers, she would have a healthier life now.

I don't take death lighty. I simply think a slow drift into meaninglessness is a slow death and it's worse than a fast death. And that by recognizing it, we can avoid it.

But yes, I agree that the constrast in the poll between promsicuty and deah is too strong. Maybe I was feeling a bit too righteous that night. 😂

[Mia-Wallace]

And yes, I am Demisexual.

[Berethor]

Interesting, demisexuality seems to be more common among women than among men.

[Apple1996]

I'd rather promiscuity, I have kids to live for so death isn't really a option

[MCheetah]

I think this question is going to be different depending on if a male or female answers it. You see men rarely get love, or even appreciation, in society, especially from women. If a man like me is too short to ever be loved, I'd take the next best thing in fake love via lust and cheap sex. I'd know it's not real, but I'd make-pretend, anyway. Still better than the current alternative; hopeless alone and doomed to it by bad genetics and an inability to simp/get cucked by awful women looking to abuse me.

So yes, Promiscuity is more preferred over death, even though I myself don't find it to be a fulfilling lifestyle choice, myself. I'd also rather be an alcoholic than die, which is another similar option.

And HEY! Don't badmouth Pentobarbital! That's some tasty sh*t!

Let's toast to some pentobarbital for all!

[Mia-Wallace]

using it after surgery?

[loveslongnails]

The thing you can't, or don't, or won't understand about the subject is that people can compartmentalize anything they want when they want to. There are millions of consenting adults having all kinds of sex and they are fine with that life until they are not, or until they change it. There are also millions of people who choose NOT to be promiscuous, but I doubt they're thinking "I'd have to kill myself if I were to become that way".

You personally don't get aroused without a strong mental connection, but some people do, and they enjoy it. We call that lust, and there's a world of morality built around it. To me, there are a lot worse things than physical lust or promiscuity. I've often said that if that was the WORST thing we did to each other on this planet and the other horrible things we do were eliminated, the world would be a much better place.

[Mia-Wallace]

It feels like you believe risky sexual behaviour or any risky behaviour for that matter, continued for long enough time, has no permanent consequences, cause no permanent damage, and that there's always a "way back".
There's probably no connection between having sex with dozens of people each year and a person's ability to emotionally commit to certain people and to an ideal, too. There's probably also no evidence that sleeping around can increase the chances of mental health issues related to trust.

I didn't know people were so strong and so incredibly happy with making dramatical changes to their lifestyles "whenever they wanted to".

I know this question is too "passionate". The contrast between death and promiscuity is sharp. But it does show people are pretty quick to downplay a behaviour that's one of the hallmarks of every imploding and stagnating community.

[loveslongnails]

Much of what you state is based on your own personal belief. You "believe" that the only way you can be "mentally healthy" is to be committed to one person, in every way including sexually. That's all fine and good, but I don't believe that promiscuity all by itself brings about the downfall of a society. What if the promiscuity wasn't "risky", but consensual among healthy individuals you knew and trusted? There's also no evidence that if there had been less screwing around historically, humanity would have made greater advances.

Any sort of risky behavior has the possibility, and probability, of lasting consequences. Yes, I do readily believe that you can change behaviors when you want to, and there IS a way back, or forward actually, to where you prefer to be.

[Rapport]

Promiscuity, easily.

I'm not finna die just because I refuse to be promiscuous, this is the only life I have for crying out loud.

I can live with it because real will be "look man, if I didn't do it I was gonna fucking die".

I can live with that, 100%.

[Aerissa_Jade]

Death, as a rape victim... who tried to take control of my life afterwards and used me for sex, and trying to kill myself... I'd totally go for ending all the pain over anything and everything else.

[Jamie05rhs]

@Aerissa_Jade How are you doing currently?

[Guardian45]

If by Promiscuity, you mean a forced human-trafficking victim, or someone who is devoid of sexuality and extremely pious, then I might see how someone might pick Death.

However, if that is NOT the case, then I would pick Promiscuity over Death every day of the week and twice on Sunday!

So it begs the Q, what is YOUR definition of Promiscuity?

[exitseven]

I'll take the promiscuity. No future in the altrnative..

[ArtemisSilver]

You should print this post and send it to your therapist, there's a lot to unpack here.

[Mia-Wallace]

My mother was a psychiatrist and I've had several psychologists after her passing. I'm pretty well informed about mental illnesses/issues myself.

I'm assuming you think I'm mentally ill in some way because I choose death over promisuity. Am I correct? Or because I say I am not willing to die alone after suffering through a meaningless life?

[ArtemisSilver]

Well you're radiating fear of contagion, and the death drive pretty well, you tell me how your doing lol

[Mia-Wallace]

How exactly am radiating "fear of contagion"? Are you using that term correctly? And my "death drive" would be very high if I was promiscuous, yes. Promiscuity would be part of my self-destruction.

How does that make me mentally ill?

[ArtemisSilver]

Your fixation becomes your self.

[Mia-Wallace]

And what's my fixation? A desire to have a meaningful life where activities actually contribute to our quality if life decades from now? Or is it my emotional needs (trust and security)?

What am I exactly fixated on? The idea of a "perfect" life? The security of being in my father's arms? What do you think it is?

[ArtemisSilver]

I'm going to be honest with you I'm not super committed to this conversation lol. You seem like you're in a bad place rn. Maybe enjoy some chamomile tea, chocolate a hot bath and a nap and see if you're still gloomy and grumpy.

I'm going to do something along the same lines. Toodaloo 🙂

[Mia-Wallace]

I feel pretty well these days. Months ago, maybe. I'm the opposite of gloomy "rn". I don't know why you felt I'm somehow gloomy. Maybe you just don't like the subject.

"Toodaloo" to you too, I guess. Lol

[letuswaltzforthedead]

Death, I wouldn't have sex with someone I'm not with

[Guardian45]

Ummm. Why Death?

[letuswaltzforthedead]

@Guardian45 I wouldn't want to have so many sexual partners who I have no connection to. I wouldn't be able to bond with anyone. plus there's the diseases and stuff that comes from sex if one isn't careful.

[dustybiker]

I would choose death.
I take love and sex too seriously.

[Kaneki05]

Promiscuity is a thing made up by people. Death is a real consequence. The answer is obvious to anyone not weak minded to give a shit about other's opinions.

[Andres77]

when i got therapy for sex addiction the therapist said "it seems like you were trying to commit suicide via sex."

[AviatorTom]

I'd be promiscuous... too many important things to do before I die. And maybe I'd make some other people happy.

[krin_m]

Not sure. That is a tough one! Let me think about it.

[Guardian45]

Why is it tough?

[Nikki1989]

Promiscuity, obviously. I don't want to die.

[Guardian45]

Ikr?

[Noodle_fan]

first one obviously , i actually enjoy my promiscuous life , i am single , so i dont see why it is wrong.

[Jamie05rhs]

I genuinely don't understand the question. I'm trying to understand, but I just don't understand. (I read the whole thing.)

[iamGod-Like]

you're so negative