What are signs your life is ruined?

[Anonymous]

And how do you deal with it?

[Anonymous]

TBH I am going through this right now. I am divorced for four months. Just as I was healing emotionally from an abusive marriage, my physical health took a turn for the worse. I barely have energy now to go to the fridge and grab a drink; without feeling like I'm gonna pass out. I got pneumonia a month ago and it wreaked havoc on my lungs. Now I honestly question whether I can ever be in another relationship, I have so much emotional baggie from abusive marriage/divorce, and barely have the energy to do what I need to physically.

Like sure, I am a very loving kind hearted person; but that's not everything a girl wants in a guy. I would never want any woman to have to fill the role of a financial provider or be expected to "be my caretaker" just because I can't breathe. I was ready to get out and meet people but my health is so bad now, that I cope with watching porn masturbating with a sex toy, sleeping more than usual -- just so I don't become depressed. I do a lot of self-reflection and try to focus on helping others so they can be happier than me, even though my life sucks lol. I guess I feel if I put forth an effort to help others, then God will help me someday.

[Anonymous]

You realize you still have the rest of your life ahead of you. Some really bad things have happened to me. My whole life has maybe been going from one kind of abuse to another. But it’s not over and I still try to live one messed up day to the next the best way I can.

[jshm2]

You've had to move to America

[joeldalton]

Lol, your life isn’t “ruined”

[Asker]

Trust me, it is.

[joeldalton]

I can guarantee it isn’t. Especially if you are 25-29.

[Asker]

How would you feel going from 19 to 29 in a day?

[joeldalton]

No one goes from age 19 to age 29 in a day.

[Asker]

Trauma victims do

[joeldalton]

No, they don’t.

[Asker]

They are traumatized for so long, by the time they ar eout of it a lot of time has passed of their valuable life.

[joeldalton]

But it hasn’t been 1 day. Do you think your life is “ruined”?

[Asker]

Yes, I do.

[Asker]

I am in denial about it, but it clearly has.

[joeldalton]

But it hasn’t. You are in control of your life.

[Asker]

I can never get back the time, or my mental state of mind.

[joeldalton]

You can’t get back the time, but that doesn’t mean you can’t progress from where you are

[Asker]

I'm old

[joeldalton]

How old are you?

[Asker]

Almost 30

[joeldalton]

So what do you need to do to get your life on track