Is there such thing as a cheating gene?

[Anonymous]

Even though I didn't exactly cheat, I dated someone for a dare to collect $100 from my friends and then dump him. I was used to doing that game to a couple guys until I fell for him specifically. He found out and even though I ended up canceling the dare (didn't collect the money), it was still over. This is a different type of betrayal than cheating but it still involved lying.

Mom on the other hand really did cheated on two past gfs in her younger years. She was similar to my age too. Neither of them ever caught her nor found out about it. But seriously is there such a thing as the cheating gene?

https://www.insider.com/is-infedility-genetic-why-people-cheat-2018-10

[HighValue]

No, but being raised by an immoral person and having too many immoral influences can affect someone's behavior unless they have very strong will power and morals themselves.

[BJP21]

Its more of a behavioral trait I wouldn't exactly call it genetics.

[misogynistic_pig]

No, it's just short-term hypergamy, all women have it.

[LazerBean]

Yes.

[In_Trance]

No. No there isn't

[Anonymous]

It's cheating

[Opinion Owner]

It mostly happens cause you weren't told its wrong so never fo it

[Asker]

I didn't cheat on any of those guys I've dated for a bet. I never went behind their backs with another guy. I'm only guilty of dating a couple guys (even if I didn't find him attractive) for a bet. That's different than infidelity.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, but why would you play with peoples feelings? That's what you get in the end. End up being hurt

[Opinion Owner]

Looks like money is more important to you than people

[Asker]

I wanted to avoid falling in love or ever being the victim of a player, of a cad, of a Chad. I wanted to have the upperhand and be the player myself. I never thought I would catch feeling in the end. The plan backfired. I ended up loving him but it was too late when he found out. He accidentally overheard our conversation.
Ever since then, I don't want to do that ever again on anyone.

[Opinion Owner]

You learned your lesson so that's good. And never do what your mom has done either.

[Asker]

I used to make fun of romantic films and people that were madly in love with each other. I used to find that so corny and ridiculous that I would tell myself ''That ain't ever happening to me, lol''. It happened in the end and I realized the hurt I've caused but it's too late. I'm too embarrassing trying to win him back. No point.

[Opinion Owner]

Don't try to get him back. It won't work. And even if it works there are high chances of he ending up calling you a whore during fights

[Asker]

I know. In his last message, it sounded like he wanted me to try. He texted this:
''For someone that claims to love me, you didn't even try to stop me from leaving. If it was me I would've try winning you back but you didn't even try. It doesn't sound like you love me enough''.

I believe that if I had done the whole begging to be forgiven, asked for 2nd chance, I might have gotten him back but at what cost? Things would've have been the same and I think that similar to the infidelity case, he would likely be throwing it in my face on some arguments or there might be neverending trust issues. It would probably be a dead, rocky relationship.

Plus I've never in my life begged a man for forgiveness nor asked for a 2nd chance. I feel this would be the same as when we get fired from a job and begged for another chance. They might accept you but pay you less. Not worth it. You're swallowing humble pie by doing that, something I've never done with anyone ever.

[Opinion Owner]

You would definitely feel like you are toy if you go back and during fights he would throw it in your face

[Asker]

Exactly. I wonder how the lady in this story must have felt. The poster's mother cheated on her dad when they were boyfriend and girlfriend. The poor guy finds her on top of his friend. She still gets forgiven after begging so much, dude still marries her later on and they have kids. Link:
www.reddit.com/.../

I wonder how many times he must have thrown the ''caught you with my friend, caught you on my couch'' in her face during arguments. The woman cheated 30 years ago when her now husband was just her boyfriend at the time but even now, it's likely the dude probably still throws it in her face.

[Opinion Owner]

I would never be with a girl I caught cheating. That would be a trauma for me to be with her. No idea how he took her back. She definitely heard words like bitch, whore and other from him during a fight.

[Opinion Owner]

Have you ever had sex for a bet or just for fun?

[Asker]

It depends on how long the bet wasted. If it was 2 months, nope. If it was 4-5 months, then yes sex was included in the bet. So technically even if I dated those guys for a bet and didn't love them, that still counts as sex in a relationship.
Just casual sex for fun (a ONS) nope.

[Asker]

**It depends on how long the bet lasted.

[Opinion Owner]

Okay. Wanna talk in DM? I wanna ask more

[Tulipsxoxo]

The dude likely stayed for the money. From my understanding of that story, the girl bought him a new couch, probably contributed when he moved out to another house and paid all his therapy and counseling sessions.
A cheater that's contributing with money (as a way to compensate you for it) and paying for your trauma sessions, sounds like they probably made a deal or something.

[Tulipsxoxo]

But yeah, I suppose you would have to have low self-esteem even if it meant staying with a wealthy cheater.