What does it mean when your boyfriend gives you a wooden cross necklace for a present?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend knows I'm a christian and I attend church weekly. We've been dating for a little over two months, and today he gave me a present for the first time. It was a little wooden cross necklace. It's the perfect thing ever and it suites my personality perfectly.

I know I shouldn't be questioning this, but do you think he is for real? By that I mean do you think he truly supports my religious beliefs (he's religion curious; meaning he's not atheist, he's just not for a specific religion either) or do you think he's just trying to move things along faster so things can get more sexual? Do you think his mom could have picked it out or given him the idea? Sorry, I shouldn't be asking. I'm just curious. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

It's a simple, you're religious, you're his girlfriend, and he's trying to give you something that he thinks you'd like. Sounds like he made the right call, too, considering you said it's perfect. But really, I think you're reading too far into this. As far as anyone can tell, this is just him giving you a nice gift he thought you'd like. This doesn't have to mean much more than that. You don't have to make it more than that. Just treat it at face value. A kind gesture.

PS: By the way, this "religion curious" thing you mentioned, the word for it is agnostic.

[Asker]

thanks, sorry about the wrong terminology, I couldn't think of the right word.

[Opinion Owner]

It sounds sincere enough. Try not to jump to "he's just doing it to get laid" so quickly.

[Asker]

okay. I don't want to, but a bunch of my friends did, and pushed that into my head.

[Opinion Owner]

Based on everything you said, he sounds pretty serious with you. I swear girls can be pretty sexist about the whole "Guys only do things to get laid" crap. The guy is talking about baptism. That's really quite something.

[Asker]

Why do so many girls think that guys always have motives? I'm glad some one else thinks he's sincere :)

[Opinion Owner]

There's a number of reasons.

#1: It's 90% socially acceptable for women to be total sexists towards men.

#2: For the most, all it takes is a girl to get scorned once to say "men are pigs".

#3: Combined with so many girls saying it and drilling it into others heads, #2 becomes much easier, with many sexist girls are there to tell her men suck.

There are more reasons, but whatever.

People suck. Not men. I've seen just as many girls just as geared toward getting laid at any cost, as men.

[Asker]

if there were an "agree" button for comments, I'd click it.

[Opinion Owner]

You could just agree with my answer, if you haven't already.

[Asker]

i already did. lol

[Opinion Owner]

oh well.

[toolt00l]

What makes you ask if he's trying to get more sexual? Is that something you're eventually willing to do? What are your views on that?

[Asker]

I'm asking because that's what my friends first conclusions were when they saw his gift. Yes eventually we'll be more intimate, but he knows I'm waiting.

[toolt00l]

I gotchya. Well to me it sounds like he was very sincere with his gift. I don't think he's trying to move things along. That being said. How serious are you about your christianity? I have a few things of advice if you want to hear it. I think it's helpful, but it isn't directly related to your question so if you're not interested I'll move on my way

[Asker]

I'm interested to hear what you have to say. Does it relate to abstinence though? Because I've heard that lecture plenty of times.

[toolt00l]

Well kind of. I guess just be careful. I know the whole abstinence thing gets old. It sounds the same coming from church and parents and everything but I guess its really something you learn on your own. I'll just tell you my experience.. If you're serious about your faith, you're going to grow in it and start understanding why certain beliefs exist.. You're young and I've been in your shoes. I've done the sexual stuff before. And yeah, is fun at first. But honestly, it eventually makes you feel

[toolt00l]

really empty and now I would do anything to take it back. It’s a really crappy feeling to get super intimate with someone you’re no longer with. And truth is, high school relationships rarely last (I can think of maybe two couples I know of that stayed together after high school). Just think ahead down the road. It has real life consequences. For example, do you want to get married someday?

[Asker]

Yes we do want to some day. He's two years older than I am, and he's plenty mature. He's actually the one who asked if one day that would be in our future. He's really serious about us being together, and so am I. I recently got confirmed at my church, and as soon as I told him that he asked me if he could be baptized. His family isn't christian or any other religion, but he occasionally attends his friends christian church. I know it takes time to grow in faith, and when we had a conversation

[Asker]

one time about that, he said he wanted to be there with me while that happened.

[toolt00l]

Well that's good. Just remember that abstinence isn't just something the bible teaches so that we can't have any fun. Its to make marriage all the more special. Again, this is just coming from someone who experienced all that. I wish I never would, and I'm just trying to share my mistakes with others so that they don't make the same ones. I guess a way to look at is this.. imagine your future husband with some other girl right now. It kind of sucks to think about. So instead, try to avoid it.

[Asker]

I know that abstinence is more than what the bible teaches. Even if it didn't, I'd stay abstinent without needing to be told to, because believe me, I've thought about my future husband being with someone else. When my boyfriend added his ex on Facebook she put up pictures of them when they were together, and there were so many ones with his tongue half way down her throat. Not only did it make me really sad to see him with another girl, but to think that he then has to kiss me with the same lips...

[toolt00l]

Exactly! But that being said, and as I'm sure you know, you can't judge anyone on their past. Not that kissing is wrong or anything but everyone deserves a fresh start and forgiveness for any mistakes they may have made before a relationship. So, when people do sexual things outside of marriage, it can cause consequences, but we're always given the opportunity to start over because God washes us clean. So, even though I have done sexual things in the past, I want to avoid that for now on. I want

[toolt00l]

to save that stuff for my wife someday and I know she will forgive me for any previous wrong doings just like I will forgive hers. To me, its just a cool idea to wait so long to do all that stuff that once you finally do with the person your married with, its wayyyyy more special. And yeah, the wait is hard, but that's what makes it so awesome in the end I guess haha

[Anonymous]

I think he just got it for you to show you that he's accepting of your beliefs. I doubt he would get you a cross to move things along sexually.

[Asker]

Okay that what I was thinking too. My friends got me thinking he's got motives... but he's a really sweet guy.

[heavenonearth]

I think it's pretty simple. He knows you're religious and thought you'd like it.

[Anonymous]

Doesn't beat what my girlfriend bought me for a necklace. I rocked it at Spring Break: link