My take is on the ridiculousness of today's relationships.....
Stop and think about it..... it seems the current generation (25 - 35) treat relationships no different to the Maccas drive through..... Quick, easy, effortless; and in the event that a relationship does not immediately present those things, its move on to the next.
It seems we as a society (global society) have likened our personal lives to just like everything else in todays world, if we can't have it the way we want it, when we want it, how we want it its pull the pin! And its just as much alarming as it is sickening.
You do not hear of tales involving the above-mentioned age group where they have been together for an extended period of time, do you? Or if you do, more often than not its a partnership of convenience or fidelity is something knowingly not maintained, but never discussed. Its easier to slip into a world of make believe. Stop and think about it.... most people in their 40's\50's are divorced, divorce rates are at an alarming high and are only continuing to increase. Has anyone stopped to wonder why that is?
Compare this to people of yesteryear. Our grandparents, or great grandparents. If something wasn't right, they rolled up their sleeves and fixed it. I have even heard someone say, 'I have been so mad at my wife I could have lit her on fire..... But - after I let the anger and hurt pass, I get on with it have a chat and find a way through with her.'
Now, admittedly; it was an extreme example and needless to say, I am not recommending those trains of thought. But that sentence when peeled back to its inner layers really conveys a powerful message. The words from this gruff, not mess around type of elderly gentleman were and are extraordinarily clear. It was quite evident this metaphor was extreme for the purposes of illustrating how mad his wife would make him. And have no doubt, his wife used an equally powerful metaphor to illustrate her frustration. But in the end, they both said the same thing after these powerful and shocking statements....... 'We chat and find a way through.'
It was (as strange as this may sound) really touching and endearing. That two people could be so mad, but know when push comes to shove, he had her back and she had his. No matter the adversity or challenge, they were committed, invested and engaged.
This is in stark and alarming contrast to what we have today, and I can't help but feel very strongly that it is as a result of everything being, 'I want it quick, fast, effortless or I dont want it.'
With this in mind, I truly believe that greater awareness should be brought to this fact. We are and have been conditioned to it, from the moment we become aware of our surroundings. Our first instances of television as children were designed to be flashy, quick, powerful, effective and captivating. Be it advertising a toy or program, it got our attention.
Look at it now as adults, where we are inundated with quick fix this, and fast results that. How many infomercials are there advertising weight loss in short periods of time with little effort!? Or financial investments... Immediate high returns, low risk!
We as a society are plummeting to our own demise through the saturation of immediate quick fixes, no different to the lackluster effort required to order a hamburger and fries and if we couldnt get the hamburger and fries with the bare minimum effort that it requires, we would get something else.
It seems as the generations progress, that the art of investing yourself into something (except career) or investing into another person, even though it may challenge our comfort zones (which are seemingly very narrow.... ie. if I have to extend effort into a relationship or love or another person) we throw it in the too hard basket! Then, as insult to injury, we hear of people complaining why they are in this position.
Memes from social media (Word Porn is an excellent example) more often than not portray love as being 'easy' and that it 'should be easy' and if it isn't than its not meant to be.... It is perpetuating a slapped together, unreasonable and unrealistic approach to love, relationships and life.
This mantra that people live by is a dangerous thing indeed!
Love and relationships require investment, sacrifice (thinking of the other person ie. consideration\putting your own wants to the side for a moment for the good of the other and the relationship) and communication (as a basis). All of these things have one prominent commonality....... EFFORT! It is not easy, it is not effortless, it is not doing what you want to do regardless of how the person may be impacted by it. Its alarming and sickening this mentality of people in relationships today.
Even in times where we actually are brave enough to face our 'foibles' and admit our shortcomings, what do we really do to rectify them? We seem to get caught in a cycle, yes I want that (or you\relationships), I can see what I need to do to achieve it, I can see my current actions are contradictory to that end result, but I won't invest effort into achieving it (be it through care, consideration, effort, communication etc). Then, the blame game starts - 'You won't accept me for who I am...... etc etc.'
Its easier to make it the other person's fault than to take accountability for ourselves and actually go out of our way to do something we say we want.
We are truly on a dangerous road and we are already seeing the damage its causing. Broken homes, families, children in custody disputes........ we see all of it. Its in our everyday lives. But we just accept it as a fact of life as we are so conditioned to these mentalities, whilst sitting there thinking 'Oh, I wish I had someone,' or when seeing an elderly couple holding hands in the street who presumably have been together for fifity plus years having the thought, 'God I wish I could have that when Im their age.'
Well STOP WISHING! START ACTING!
We are the one's that have control over our destiny. Stop slapping the same 'fast food packaging' on our personal, everyday lives and start investing! Invest in yourself and invest in someone else! If you're reading this and think, 'Gee.... I haven't taken my wife\husband out for a while' well there's only one person that can start the change! YOU! Take a chance on love, life, children.... do something out of the ordinary! Stop waiting for things to happen, or things to be easy...... Life is never easy! Find someone who you love - and do something totally selfless. Implement a weekly plan in your marriage\partnership to do something out of the ordinary. That shows their worth.
Or...... say its all too hard, or not this week im too busy..... then pull into the drive-thru at your local fast food restaurant.... and order a cold, crappy meal that more often than makes you feel ordinary afterwards..... and think of how fulfilled you feel after getting your meal, the quick easy and effortless way.....
Most Helpful Opinions