Girls Really ARE From Venus and Honestly, I Need a Translator

[cyberland]

I don't get it, okay?

I've tried, I swear. I've tried interpreting your subtlety. I've tried reading your signs and signals and motions and crazy-ass moods, and I've tried to be as understanding as humanly possible. I've tried to be exactly the guy you want me to be, only to realize that THIS girl wants a different kind of guy than THAT girl. You'd think that's just normal, right? You'd say, "Well, of course different girls have different preferences when it comes to guys." But I'm talking about complete opposites; two different girls can like guys that are on total opposite ends of the spectrum in every possible way. On top of which, the same damn girl can switch on a dime, which makes the whole situation even more impossible.

I know, I know. Everyone will just say I'm whining and I don't want to come across as bitter. I'm actually just asking for a little help. Maybe some nice girls out there can explain why they've got squirrels juggling knives in their heads, and why all guys are expected to be just fine with this disturbing fact. ...okay, sorry, that was offensive. Didn't mean that.

Honestly, there are times when I find it fun. It's sort of like learning about a different species and I imagine it might feel the same for girls, right? I know guys are a lot simpler but I've heard women complain all the time, and about the same thing I'm complaining about here. So obviously, there are difficulties for both sexes when it comes to communication, and especially in regards to romance and love. When we start talking about sex, then everything becomes so screwed up and ludicrous that it's like getting lost in a brier patch the size of Montana with a broken leg. There's just no escape.

There are times when the game starts to taste a little sour. I love women and I love getting to know them...mostly. And really, the majority of the time, I can look back on a failed flirtation, or failed first date, or failed sexual encounter and go, "Yep, I know exactly why it flopped." It's those times when I can't figure it out, when I just toss my hands up in the air in utter frustration and consternation; that's when I think I need psychiatric help. Or rather, not professional help, but maybe just regular ol' female assistance. Maybe me - and a lot of other guys - are just missing one simple component that would help us better understand females.

It's like searching for the legend to a map, a key to a lock, the code-cracker. I have this sneaking suspicion that it's being held in some fortress somewhere, guarded by an army of super women, and there's no way the secret leaves. Then again, if they really are doing that, I wonder why... Wouldn't we all be better off if we spread the knowledge around a little? I could offer a trade, if you want. I could give you girls the key to better understanding guys, and you could give us your little code book in return.

I'm just worried that it isn't a fair trade. :P

[miamigirl1970]

Oh how I would love to trade in this discussion. I am actually working on a book about me the female speaking on behalf of men. Men don't get enough credit from women. I have a lot of male friends, I work in a man's world. I have understood men for years, but it has been one Man, who has stumped me for the last year and a half. I will trade input any day! Any help you want about women, from one of age and experience, I will be happy to comply!

[Gommers]

They're not that difficult to understand when you realize that most of them have no idea what they want but want you to lead them to it anyway.

[HOAAH]

I understand your frustration. I am also frustrated with figuring out my guy.
I see you are trying to understand and that is a good first step. Good job, I am doing that too.
I recommend you and your partner take the personality test. Figure out what your personality is, this will bring huge light into your relationship. I am ISFJ he is INTP. we both live in our heads it is like we are talking to ourselves and winning in our heads when we talk. It doesn't go anywhere, but at least I understand that.

Yes everyone is different. Also I highly recommend taking the 5 love language test. I am a quality time person, he isn't. He is a service person. As long as I take care of the kids, do laundry and groceries for him he feels loved. He needs nothing else. For me I need quality time with him, he can't understand that. He doesn't speak that language. He thinks him going to work for me and making money is enough, he gets confused. I understand. See how that works?

Plus relationships take time. I have been with him over 7 years now and still trying to figure him out but I know him so much more now than I did 7 years ago and I understand him so much more now than I did before. You have to take time and effort to get to know someone. Good luck

[MrCasanova]

Well, it's like this. You're probably talking to some of the wrong women, going for
the very headstrong above average of the bunch, caught some really bad apples,
which you already know. I felt this way, I've never gotten remotely close to a date,
if and when I do or did, barely a second and a third. You gotta lower your standards, go for the weakest herd, the ones who sit in the library with their coats on, wearing glasses, they may surprise you, when you spend time with them, take their glasses off themselves and have you rolling on the floor with
Their eloquent beauty, not saying, you should based it on looks, but you would
be surprised, supermodels types always go for the ones that are alpha males,
mob types; who break a milk carton with their fists, the fair trade would be
going out with someone that is average or below, like what jerks consider a nerd,
I don't consider them nerds, just different. In fact, you probably should consider
purchasing Kezia Noble's DVDs online at www.Kezia-noble.com she is a Female Pick-UP Coach and dating expert on dating tips for men, I've tried her, she's good,
I'm just getting around to purchasing another DVD from her, her boot-camp.

[Kinstrome]

I can second the stuff about Kezia, surprisingly good.

[MrCasanova]

@Kinstrome Yep.

[Shorty1991]

Both genders can be just as hypocritical, indecisive and as confusing as each other. Lack of communication is one of the biggest problems these days. More and more and more single people seem to be developing crushes but rather than act on it themselves they sit back and expect their crush to do all the work for them. Also people who have been in relationships might have been lied to and cheated on. Sometimes its hard to trust people if you've been hurt countless times before. It can even put people off of relationships for life. I've never had a relationship, but most guys that I encounter these days show a non verbal interest but never seem to act on it. Which is too bad because its lack of communication on their part to begin with. Don't know the reasons why, they either just lack the balls to talk to me or they are already in relationships but have taken a shine to me. Which would be the usual.

[cross98]

@shorty1991 thank you for making sense ! there's a girl up above the comment section that actually thinks girls are more complicated, when we its not really gender related to determine how difficult a person is.

[Jjpayne]

"So obviously, there are difficulties for both sexes when it comes to communication, and especially in regards to romance and love. When we start talking about sex, then everything becomes so screwed up and ludicrous that it's like getting lost in a brier patch the size of Montana with a broken leg. There's just no escape"

I agree with this analogy. Us guys are just along for the ride. Funny thing is girls a lot of times do not like being the roller coaster. All we can do, is do our part and then back away until the girl comes around.

[Cypherenter]

I just read this article and it is a good one. I do have to say though that I myself have no problem understanding women. I think in my opinion the reason a lot of guys are confused by women, and have a hard time with them, is because men are afraid to just step into a womans world and try to relate with a woman on an emotional level. Most guys will view this as weak, or that they may be labeled as gay, but the fact of the matter is this will help you connect with women better. I also think a lot of men get nervous and dont want to admit it, so they inside they use the excuse women are confusing and hard to read, when if you really look and listen, its not hard to know when I girl likes you, I can for the most part tell when a girl is attracted to me, and I do admit that sometimes it is easy to confuse friendliness with attraction, and that is where you have to test the water a bit to see how she reacts, then you will know for sure if she likes you.

[93stepsawayfromhome]

Just my $0.02, but have you thought about, just for a day or so, completely forgetting about this notion that "males are simple" and "females are complicated"? I've never understood why females are perceived as "complicated", and how males would need a "manslator" because it's all code and whatever. It's no more difficult to understand a female than it is to understand a male. They're people just you, with the same feelings and the same emotions.

I understand that you might not always be able to relate to people who just so happen to be female, but that doesn't matter. It happens all too often that a male is perceived as "complicated" because that's just the way they are, while if a woman is perceived as "complicated", it's because they're a female. Talk about double standards, ffs

[Anonymous]

Poor blokes, I feel for you. Also makes me laugh sorry. Only coz you guys are so cute. Cute trying to figure girls out. I'm a simple, straight forward chick. Say it how it is. Sometimes too blunt. No games. I don't even get girls who aren't like me. I find it hard to be friends with typical girl types because simply nothing in common and its as confusing for me as it is for you. Sorry am not much of help. I guess you just need to find someone who's not affected by media stereotyping women behaviour. Maybe coz my father pretty much raised me and thought me everything I know. But there are girls out there who you don't have to figure out so stay positive.

[Anonymous]

Okay so.. Basically they're all nuts and irrational and they all have their own special blend of crazy. Some are humorous and delightful, some intriguing and some just makes you wish they were anything else.

But I suppose to sum it all up: They're crazy. That's why monogamy is a thing. You can handle figuring out one crazy person. Multiples isn't doable.

[thequirkymockingjay]

You're right just don't tell that to your girlfriend

[chigurl33]

@thequirkymockingjay he knows, that's why his name isn't there. Im a girl and even I think we're crazy

[Stevan7]

No, let me tell you now. You tried to understand woman from man's perspective. Bullshit okay? That is like trying to look at atom with telescope. Don't do that, then you come here and whine how you are fucking hard working devoted to this (Which maybe you are i don't know), but you are not using right tools.

[castratedwhiteguy]

Are you an alpha male? If not, than this is your fate. Mixed signals are a woman's way of telling you that you don't measure up. However, you'll know it when you finally find the right woman. Suddenly the lines of communication will open like a floodgate. Keep this in mind and, in the mean time, don't be afraid to walk away from bullshit.

[mostwomenshouldstfu]

I don't know man, truth and consideration. And honesty. Be objective when they get like that. Stand your ground if you know it helps the both of you. They're cyclic in nature, wave after wave of storm after storm. Just hunker down. Like they sometimes think you're lying, they completely misinterpret or construe wtf you say so they lie back to get information out of you when being direct would have saved a f*** load of time. Their comfort is paramount to them.

[Anonymous]

They are insane some of them. They seem to think not replying to texts and then carrying on like normal a long time later is polite. Yet would be incensed if it were done to them.

Can u help me out on a question about women www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2173776-why-do-women-do-these-3-things-in-terms-of-being-sexual-around-guys

[Mitosisosmosis]

Rather then try to decipher her every action and mood, maybe you just need to be an to listen to her. As usual woman just need to express themselves to you. You don't want to live you're life as somebody else such as her. Be a man and tell what you want. I'm sure she will listen.

[BonjourMadam]

You don't have to think about it a lot, the most important thing is physical appearence then personality. Some girls say that I'm handsome and sometimes I don't need to try hard because of the girls who acknowledge you if you are handsome.

[Vostock]

Then I must be ugly as fuck.

[BonjourMadam]

@Vostock No don't say this man. Self-care is very important for you , I think you can be looking good guy , I always be careful about my appearence and usually take a shower etc.

[thequirkymockingjay]

Yeah we girls acknowledge you if you're handsome but when they get to know you and you treat them like crap and aren't invested then OBVIOUSLY she's going to break up with you... It's not rocket science

[BonjourMadam]

@thequirkymockingjay I never treat them like a crap so there isn't any problem for me 😏 Cuz I know girls and guys are like puzzles, I love my other piece 😂

[Emiko]

This made me laugh lol I'm a female and even i don't understand other females half of the time...

[Anonymous]

send them a dick picture (especially if you have a big dick like me) and wait for the magic. If you fuck them good they stick with you forever. Easy pizzy lemon squizzziiii cum on their face after they love it

[thequirkymockingjay]

Uh... no
Seriously? Do you have anything better to do? "If you fuck them good they stick with you forever"? What rubbish!

[Opinion Owner]

@thequirkymockingjay you are 16 baby so stop replying to me, you don't know much about dicks yet. I talk from experience, once I have them orgasm they text me all day and beg me for more sex

[Mamura]

Good job man Yeah fucking keep messing them !

[Opinion Owner]

@Mamura I know girls are shallow and funny. I love them how freak they can be in bed and when they scream from my cock. When I behaved nicely (was stupid when I was younger) no girl ever wanted me. I turned into a jerk because life Is hard following bitches around and I kept sending them big dick picture, my pictures messaging them how hard would fuck them and so on and I got all the girls. They want to be fucked rude and hard very very hard make that pussy stretch out. Don't read the bullshit over internet where they say they want nice guy, they want you to fuck them very very hard keep their hands strongly against the bed and fucking fuck them

[Library]

Eh not really. Are you sexist?

[rose004b]

The up votes/down votes are just glorious :D

[Virginunicorn]

Some reason when i read the topic, i was thinking of Venus razors... Lmao XD

[Anonymous]

You don't think they come from Uranus? (I'm sorry. Lame and immature, I know, but someone had to say it. lmao 😆)

[TheDictator]

It's because there's nothing much to understabd. You should check up mytake.