Problems arise in many marriages because the couples hold a selfish view of marriage. The man isn't concerned about his wife's all-round welfare. The wife too, is non-challant about her husband's total well-being. Each person in the union minds their own desires and only cross paths, once in a blue moon, when a crisis inflicts pain on both; or when mutual pleasure demands it.
There is no room for individualism in true marriage. The two persons have fused to become one such that both can't but share each other's pain or pleasure, poverty or prosperity, defeat or victory. Thus, if the husband's life experiences don't impact on the wife, or the wife's condition doesn't affect her husband, then true marriage doesn't exist.
Becoming one flesh means that without the husband, the wife isn't complete and without the wife, the husband's life is missing. Therefore, the husband would need his wife's help to move forward and upward in his life's undertaking ; and the wife, too would need her husband's support to succeed in her endeavors.
How do you do this? There are four things to do to help your spouse reach his or her peak.
Your spouse has piles of life's desires all of which you may not know unless you observe his or her life's endeavors. Areas to check include: career, further education, asset acquisition, and hobby. You may also discuss the aspirations of each other in a free atmosphere devoid of bias. Each of you should be allowed to unburden his or her heart without intrusion. You might wish to put your statements down. Often, couples unwittingly start a when the wishes of one partner are hastily do missed by another as unnecessary and unrealistic. Once this happens, the family atmosphere is set for conflict, trust is crushed and love is impaired, such that mutual planning for progress becomes impossible. Thus, while you're trying to find out each other's aspirations, listen attentively as your spouse bares his or her mind without interrupting ending the discussion.
Since the couple need each other's help to achieve their life goals, the first step in fixing the problem is to harmonize their desires. This necessary to avoid conflict of interest. If you are going to help each other, you must agree on the appropriate means, manner and methods. For example, if one of his desires to extend the limits of his organization by travelling abroad on long-term; and you are itching to acquire a new vehicle, how do these opposing goals rhyme? And yet you must flow together because you are bound together!
That is why harmonization is necessary. Now, couples who have had to plan their life's ambitions together will confess it isn't a smooth exercise. Unless both of you recognize that you are inseparable partners-in-progress and eschew selfishness, attempts to help each other realize your aspirations will generate sparks and rock the foundation of the marriage.
Therefore, the following safety methods should be applied when trying to harmonize your goals.
1. Consider your desires and decisions.
2. Concede, condescend, and comply in love.
3. Create a priority list of your desires and check each as you achieve it.
4. Carve out a time-span for the completion of each goal and try to keep to it.
5. Commit yourself to helping each other reach the peak of the sat goals.
•Follow it up.
Helping each other reach the peak requires personal commitment and sacrifice. Such commitment and sacrifice however shouldn't be a one-shot affair. They should be continuous. Often, you have to encourage each other with various means of motivation, supporting, assisting each other and also praying. Counseling and comforting each other when events are contrary to expectations. You must keep doing all these until the goal is accomplished. Sometimes, one may find couples who quit too soon from helping each other achieve life's ambition. When this happens, each partner decides to paddle his or her own canoe losing the benefits that martial unity and cooperation offer.
It's strange to see a couple struggling to outshine each other in life's accomplishments. The husband and his wife are one. Therefore, the glory of the husband is the glory of the wife, and vice versa. There should be no room for envy, rivalry or competition. Rather, help each other to get there.