Why Emotional Cheating Is Worse Than Physical Cheating

[CHARismatic110]

*taps mic* is thing on? Hey all! It’s been awhile since I’ve written a Take. I don’t really have an explanation for my hiatus other than life. I plan to start writing on a regular basis again though so stay tuned!

The topic of discussion for today is cheating. The focus: EMOTIONAL.

Just so we’re all on the same page, cheating is wrong. It’s not a mistake. It’s not an accident. It’s a choice. It is a decision. Period. I think that we can all agree on the fact that cheating in general is pretty terrible thing to experience. If it comes down to choosing between physical cheating and emotional cheating, emotional cheating will always be worse in my opinion. I feel like once your emotions are with someone else, there’s no coming back from that. With physical cheating, though the act itself is all types of screwed up (no pun intended), there are people out there that attach no emotional feelings to sex. To them it’s just a means to a way to get pleasure. There is no attachment. With emotional cheating, it’s all about attachment.

You can come home to your S. O. every day and still have sex. But if your heart isn't it in it, then you're just going through the motions. It becomes routine. You can do all of those things and still be waiting until you can talk to or see another person. And it doesn't have to have anything to do with physical. Think of how you felt when you were first getting to know your S.O. And how much time you spent talking to them and learning about them. Think of that point you reached where you got butterflies just from getting a text or call from them. Or how you felt knowing that you were going to see them. Think of how attached you became before the physical aspect was introduced. Now think of your S.O. doing this with someone other than you. Think of them enjoying talking to them and being in their presence. THAT is emotional cheating, and knowing that the person you love feels that way about someone else is absolutely heartbreaking.

As always, thank you guys for reading. Until next time...

#CHARismaticOut ✌🏾😎❤

[hellionthesagereborn]

Well according to studies emotional cheating is worse for women, for men its physical cheating. For women the reason emotional cheating is worse (by their standards) is because it means he is more inclined to leave the relationship and by extension take his resources with. That would have, historically and evolutionarily speaking, been a near death sentence as raising a child with no resources or protector (try out running an animal while also carrying around a child or while pregnant) would have been incredibly difficult (not impossible but definitely not easy). Meanwhile for men physical cheating is considered worse because paternity is always in question, is the child that he is investing so much energy, resources and effort into his or isn't it? He can never truly know and while he is giving all that to this child who might not be his he is by extension taking resources away from children that he "knows" are his as well as potentially believing he has reproduced when he hasn't thus ensuring the end of his genetic line. Personally I find both intolerable.

[CHARismatic110]

Yeah, I always assumed this. Women are more emotional and men are more physical so it just seems that that's how they would be affected.

[Berethor]

@CHARismatic110 it's likely part of the reason why men are less emotional.

[hellionthesagereborn]

@Berethor Men are not less emotional, they respond to emotions differently. We compartmentalize women don't. We have more grey matter in our brain and women more white matter so a woman's brain is actually more connected then a mans meaning the parts of the brain communicate more and are more likely to be triggered by certain responses while mens brains are more disconnected so they are not likely to have memories or emotions triggered unless their is a specific attempt to do so (also why women are far more likely to suffer from PTSD then men despite the fat that men are more likely to be in situations that cause it.)

[PrincessPie]

"I feel like once your emotions are with someone else, there’s no coming back from that. With physical cheating, though the act itself is all types of screwed up (no pun intended), there are people out there that attach no emotional feelings to sex. To them it’s just a means to a way to get pleasure. There is no attachment. With emotional cheating, it’s all about attachment."

Couldn't agree anymore with you.

[CHARismatic110]

Thank you, and thanks for reading!

[Being_a_good_Indian]

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Thanks for Sharing @CHARismatic110

In short when you do something physical that constitutes cheating in your relationship like have sex with someone other than your partner, kiss, cuddle, be naked with them, allowing them to touch you in sexual ways that is physical cheating.

Emotional cheating is bonding emotionally, trusting someone more than your partner, running to someone for emotional needs more than your partner, secret messages, being so overly concerned about them, valuing their opinion more glowing qnd obsessing about getting compliments from them, being upset or concerned when they have a partner, hiding even simple conversation between you and them, holding on to messages from them from way way back that is emotional cheating.

😊👍

[CHARismatic110]

Yup, I'm aware of the difference between the two.

[Being_a_good_Indian]

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q.likesuccess.com/.../...wledge-sharing-quotes.jpg

😊

Most of your Takes are Awesome. 😊

#CHARismaticOut 👏👏

[CHARismatic110]

Thanks bud 😊

[FallOutBoy2001]

I feel a little bad, as it seems I'm guilty of emotional cheating. I'm afraid of sharing things with my new boyfriend, so I go to friends (including my ex, who I dated for 3 years) before going to him. It's my fucked-up mentality (abandonment issues, yay!) but now I feel like shit. I do love him, more than anyone, but I'm scared of him leaving me even if he says he won't

[Being_a_good_Indian]

@FallOutBoy2001

Trust that your boyfriend means what he says. Constantly asking him questions like, "Do you really love me?" or "You'd rather be with someone like her, wouldn't you?" can serve to make him question the relationship and might ultimately push him away. While you don't have a guarantee that he'll never leave you, remember that there's no promise that anything in life will be the same tomorrow.

Work on meeting your own needs. When you become happy alone and with yourself, you will be free to fully enjoy your relationship with your boyfriend because you will not feel dependent on him. Find out what makes you happy and then do those things.

Standard stress-management techniques such as exercise, deep breathing and meditation can work to help relieve your anxiety.

[Being_a_good_Indian]

Seek therapy. It's often difficult to let go of the fear of abandonment without getting professional help to learn how to become a confident and self-sufficient person. A therapist can help support you in your transition from needing a relationship to wanting a relationship.

Hope it Helps. 😊
Take Care. 😊🇮🇳

[kevincash158]

>There are people out there that attach no emotional feelings to sex.

So, yes, this is true. But, the reason that they "attach no feelings to sex" is because they have no feelings to attach to it in the first place. They've already had sex with so many people that it does not matter anymore. Or they have been abused or in some way messed up.

No healthy person "attaches no emotion" to sex. It does not work that way. And, I hope you do not meet someone who tells you they can "separate the two:" run away from that person quickly.

[CHARismatic110]

I agree. I feel like there's a disconnect somewhere down the line with people who behave this way.

[bloodmountain1990]

I wouldn't say it's all black and white like that. I mean certainly the people you described exist, not denying that. But there's been women I've had sex with or even just made out with and had an emotional attachment to and others I have not. It's all situational based on how much you click with them and other factors. It's different for each person though.

[Berethor]

Maybe girls think that it's worse, for most guys physical cheating is worse, we don't care if the girl have feeling for the other guy or not, all we care about is that she given him to fuck her, and that's makes her an cheater, as well as an slut. Also why should I care so much if she enjoying talking with other guy? a girl can talk with an true just friend as well.

[CHARismatic110]

You should care because it can and usually does effect your sex life.

[Berethor]

@CHARismatic110 if she had feeling for someone else but don't do anything about it, is it's really matter that much? as a man I tend to care more about tangible things.

[CHARismatic110]

The point is that emotional cheating has a domino effect. It will always hit other areas of your relationship. That includes your sex life. The more feelings she's putting into someone else, the less she's going to have for you. So even if she's not sleeping with another guy. The feelings that she has for another guy make cause her to no longer want to sleep with you. How will you feel then?

[Berethor]

Assuming that she have feeling only for him and not for me as well? also a man likely to be able to be attracted to multiple women, but as long as he is not doing anything about it, it's not really matter. And talk, even a little flirting is not such a big deal, as long as something sexual is not happening, usually an kiss ( not on the cheek) is the line that one should not cross, and more then that is even worse. Sure there might be an cases when being overprotective is justified, but I don't tend to think that it's usually so. If she no longer want to sleep with me, no matter for what reason, she might as well be an frigid, then we have an problem.

[genuinlysensitive]

Physical cheating always involves emotional cheating as well, don't let them fool you. "oh it's just sex" is bs, there is always some level of emotional connection, especially when it keeps happening with the same guy. Yes, emotional cheating is wrong, but there is always emotional cheating as well in physical cheating. Personally I would only forgive either if the woman came to me about it, admitted it, and I believed she was sorry.

[CHARismatic110]

I don't disagree. I believe that the two can be intertwined, which makes things that much worse.

[DiegoO]

That's the big difference when it comes to cheating. I think women are more susceptable to emotionally cheat, once that happen there is no going back. Probably is the reason why when we guys cheat, we have the necesecity to get back, reconciliate, our type of cheating is mostlikely physical.

Girls in general are another case, once they cheat.. They'll dump you.

[CHARismatic110]

Yup because women tend to be more emotional. Easier for them to become emotionally attached. So if and when physical cheating does take place, that emotional attachment is already their on her end. She was already done with the relationship. Which is when she should've ended it, and then at least the physical cheating would've never taken place. But, the damage is done with the emotional.

[LogicBomber]

Emotional cheating is worse in a woman's mind because women value emotion more than sex.
A male will consider physical cheating much worse.

The saying goes, A woman will forgive a man for sex as long as he didn't "Love" the girl.
A guy doesn't care how much you "loved" the guy as long as you didn't have sex with him.

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[Unit1]

This is kinda true. Really.

[0112358]

@Unit1 Of course.

For most of human evolution, a man cheating physically meant... mild embarrassment for his partner. A man cheating emotionally meant she might lose him and his support.

For a man, a woman cheating emotionally meant some risk of losing her, but cheating physically meant he could be raising other men's children and have his genes die out of the species.

[BrittBratt2416]

Ugh no, emotional and physical cheating is still bad in my book. One is not worse than other cause it's still cheating

[CHARismatic110]

Cheating on general, as a collective, is shitty. As I stated. But in my opinion, if it came down to choosing emotional would be worse. But that's why it's my opinion. You're entitled to yours. Thanks for reading.

[BrittBratt2416]

so if you walk into the living room and see your SO having sex with someone else right on top of coffee table and they get up and say " Hey, at least I didn't emotional cheat on you". You're saying you would be okay with that?

[CHARismatic110]

I said that they were both shitty. I did say that right? I'm aware that physical cheating sucks. I've been cheated on. My point is that IN MY OPINION, emotional cheating is worse. Why? Because it has a domino effect on your whole relationship. It effects multiple areas, including your sex life. When someone is emotionally cheating, then means they are putting more feelings into someone else, and less into you.

[BrittBratt2416]

I know its your opinion, but just doesn't make any sense to me. You say both are shitty but then go on to say it worse. Guess what? They both the same and go hand in hand. There has to be some emotional connection in order for it to become physical, its already domino effect if the person is screwing someone else cause they still putting their time, energy, and emotions into someone else. You're basically still saying its okay to be cheated on.

[CHARismatic110]

See, I don't feel like there is always emotional attachment when it comes to sex. Maybe that's where you aren't understanding. And no, I'm not saying that it's ok to be cheated on. Where tf are you getting that from? I would be hurt by both of them!!!

[BrittBratt2416]

No, its either your hurt by emotional cheating or physical.

[CHARismatic110]

Ok so either your comprehension skills aren't working or you're going out of your way miss my point. Either way, thanks for reading and thanks for your input.

[Prof_Don]

I can more easily get over a girl emotionally confiding in another man... than I can a woman that had another man's dick in her mouth or her pussy.

[CHARismatic110]

I feel like most guys would forgive emotional cheating before physical cheating.

[Berethor]

@CHARismatic110 true, that's because women tend to be more emotional then men.

[Unit1]

Same here prof don

[Unit1]

Ehhh. Cheating is cheating and i cannot forgive any types of cheating and betrayal. It's a scummy thing to do.

[CHARismatic110]

Oh I didn't say either one was worth forgiving.

[Unit1]

That's right. But still cheaters are really disgusting dumb-efs.
As others have stated and to each their own: one way of cheating is worse for someone and the other way of cheating is worse for the others. I think for men physical cheating is worse while for women it's the emotional part.

[CHARismatic110]

I agree.

[red_knight]

What do you thinkthink the fine would/should be?-

[OpenWine]

emotional cheating is what comes right before physical cheating (unless your girl goes pick up a stranger).

and since this stupid thing keeps popping up over and over here's my copy pasta on how I would feel about it.

https://youtu.be/FLLnL4RZCPk

[bloodmountain1990]

Cheating is cheating no matter how you spin it. I would say that emotional cheating is the cause, physical cheating is the symptom.

[CHARismatic110]

Cheating IS cheating. That wasn't the point of this. Everybody knows that cheating is shitty. I've been cheated on. Multiple times. So I know firsthand.

And you're gonna have to elaborate because right now what you're saying doesn't make sense to me.

[bloodmountain1990]

What I mean is if they’re cheating physically, then they’re not fully emotionally invested in the first place.

[AlwaysBelieving]

True. The thing is there's varying degrees (I think) and you and your partner needs to discuss what constitutes emotional cheating.

[CHARismatic110]

Boundaries most definitely should be discussed, I agree.

[misaqi-s-fan]

Becus you dont love the person physically.. its about feelings😊

[CHARismatic110]

Pretty much

[red_knight]

Cheating is bad no matter how you put it...
There should be a fine for it lol

[CHARismatic110]

There should.

[Kuraj]

Sex is the culmination of all the butterflies and what not, so I think it is entirely silly to say there is no attachment.

Unless the person is a whore, but in that case there are never any butterflies.

[MuceyBabi]

legit post

[CHARismatic110]

Sex is not the culmination of any butterflies for me sooo...

[MuceyBabi]

I think he meant from a guys perspective @charismatic110 ! i agree with his perspective as a guy but yeah I agree that dones't seem to be how girls feel

[Sabretooth]

passion is not the same as love-emotional cheating can be corrected

[CHARismatic110]

I disagree but thanks for reading!

[Sabretooth]

It could mean you simply like how he or she looks

[Browneye57]

You're right that it's cheating, but it's not worse or better than physical cheating. It's all cheating.
Still, talking to and relating to a guy is a whole different can of worms than fucking him. Seriously.

[WhereAmI]

So if I think dirty thoughts of other women while I'm going with you I'm cheating? Okay... #GuyJustBeingAGuy

[CHARismatic110]

Thinking random thoughts about a random female, and actually talking to a female on w regular basis and thinking these thoughts about her are tottaly different things.

[WhereAmI]

What if it's some girl at work I admire from afar, but don't approach to ask out?

[CHARismatic110]

I'm not saying that you're not gonna look at other women. That's impossible. But once you cross that line and take action, then that's a problem. So this woman at work, you can look at her all you want. But once you start interacting with her outside of the necessary needs for work, it's an issue.

[WhereAmI]

So flirting is emotional cheating to you?

[damnwinter]

hey, it sucks to have your SO flirting around with other people. just sayin.

[CHARismatic110]

It can and usually does lead to it.

[archiz]

Wlc bck^^
And nice take :)

[CHARismatic110]

Thank you!!

[Anon-ymous1]

Meh.

Not to mention the term "cheating" is erroneous and stupid.