When considering being with someone I only consider them for long term so my standards are quite high. I'm not sure if I'll ever even be able to find someone that is good enough.
1. Not a recreational drug use
I don't want someone that uses drugs or has used drugs. They prioritize drugs above others, can't be trusted, are irresponsible, will have bad health problems later on or die in their 50s, and she will damage her eggs which can damage all future potential kids.
2. Doesn't drink alcohol.
I don't drink alcohol and I expect a partner to not drink either. I don't want any excuses that they did something bad while drinking so it isn't their fault. BS. They made the choice to drink and are responsible for their actions.
3. No promiscuous people.
If she has done hook ups/ONS/FWB I think it is immoral and gross. I also don't believe that people that do that could be faithful long term. Sex with someone like that wouldn't be special because they could do it without an emotional attachment.
4. Not friends with any ex.
Unless they have kids with someone, there is no legitimate reason why they need to have any contact with any of their exes. People that stay friends with an ex are just keeping them around as a back up plan. Plus whenever they have a disagreement in their relationship they go to their ex to be comforted and end up cheating. (I already consider that emotional cheating)
5. She needs to contribute.
I'm not an ATM. Women can work and should contribute to a relationship just like the man does. She should contribute to the family/home and not expect everything to be handed to her by her SO. First date we pay our own way, then after that we can take turns. I won't pay for her until she has done it for me first. If they insist I pay I would just leave because she would just be another common greedy gold digger that is easily replaced.
6. Housework is divided up based on how much we work a job.
If I work twice as many hours at work I certainly am not going to be doing an equal amount of work at home as someone that sits around for half the day doing nothing. I want equal or close to equal contribution in effort.
7. She needs to initiate stuff too.
I want to be hugged by her just as much as she wants it. Same with other stuff too. I shouldn't have to feel like I am unwanted, which is exactly how I feel if I always have to be the one to initiate things.
8. I want handmade gifts and special gestures.
My feelings matter too. I also want to feel like I am special to her. Girls aren't the only ones that need to feel cared about. And a last minute store bought gift that I don't even like that she saw advertised on TV telling her I should like it isn't a good gift.
9. I want a family.
I can only be with someone if she also wants a family/kids. It is very important to me. And I want to spend time with them too. I don't want to be one of those dads that is just an ATM to their kids where he only provides money and the mother gets to spend time together with them during all their special events. I want to get to be there for their life events, school events, to have a family game day/night each week, teach them things, etc. I don't want to be excluded from my future kids' lives just because I am the man.
10. Disagreements need to be private.
If there ever are disagreements, they should remain between the two of us until we solve them. It shouldn't be about complaining to others to see who can get more people to side with them. It shouldn't be about who "wins" an argument. It should be about doing what is good for the relationship/family/etc. and possibly compromising sometimes on certain things if need be.
11. I want more than just physical attraction.
Yes, I need to be attracted to her, but I want more than that from a relationship. I don't want all of our time together to be only sexual. I want to talk about stuff, I want to share common interests/hobbies, I want to have compatible life goals. I would really like to have a girl that is into some sort of gaming. Board games, Table Top RPGs, Card games like MTG, video games, something like that. Those are my favorite hobbies and sharing them, even one of those with someone would make time spent together so much more interesting.
12. As far as work goes.
I want someone that has a respectable job. No internet cam girl whores, nobody that has an annoying calling job that harasses people all day aggravating them. And their job should be something where they get to come home to me and our family each day, so no traveling jobs or on call jobs like doctors or stewardesses or military.
13. Not a feminist.
I don't want someone that is unfair to men, is against men's fair treatment under the law, etc.
So those are many, but not all of my standards. I myself live up to all of those I listed though I doubt I could find someone that will meet those standards.
As far as physical stuff, They need to be White, Hispanic, Asian, or some mix of those. Between 4' 9" to 5' 10" but 5' to 5' 4" would be much more desirable. Petite build is my favorite (short, skinny, small breasts), but athletic is my second favorite and just slim is alright. I would say average is fine, but these days average somehow means 50 pounds overweight. They need a face that is attractive to me (Highly subjective. Some I find the most attractive are only average to others and some that many others think are 9s or 10s are average or below average to me). No tattoos or very little. The more they have the less attracted to them I am.
So how do I measure up physically? I am White, 6' tall, strong/lift weights, 265 pounds, Dark brown slicked back hair, no tattoos, attractive face (I won't show it on this site to all my haters), and I have a deep voice. I know it's a big surprise I'm not actually a green troll like my profile picture. :P
How I sound:
I started this as an answer to someone's question about high standards but it ended up too long so I made it a MyTake.