The Saga is over. One year and One Day... The most Shortest - Longest Relationship from hell

So I have been posting about the disaster relationship ended yesterday. One year and One Day.

The Saga is over. One year and One Day... The most Shortest - Longest Relationship from hell

So the "perfect" relationship in my eyes ended. Not the way it began. On shaky foundation albeit.

The Saga is over. One year and One Day... The most Shortest - Longest Relationship from hell

So we write the date. We are happy. we are smiling. Its paradise.

The Saga is over. One year and One Day... The most Shortest - Longest Relationship from hell

But as we learn about them and actions they take. We realize that they have a disorder, Borderline Personality and Narcissist.. So that paradise.. becomes...

The Saga is over. One year and One Day... The most Shortest - Longest Relationship from hell

So yesterday was her 47th birthday. She said she has plans with "someone else" but also said she did not want to be alone. As part of her mania she wanted me on the phone with her. So I wished her (or shall I say "sang" off key in my dead of sleep) a "happy birthday. I got out of my house and went to party city, got her a # 4 and 7 Birthday balloon. I proceeded to go to the dollar store and bought 9 balloons which said "Happy Birthday".. with a card, some flowers etc. and a box of chocolate since I bought her a ton of stuff the week prior..

So she has her door open, does not see what Im doing, I put up happy birthday balloons on her railings and she finally notices seeing what I was doing "A befuddled look as she always has". So I brought in the "4" and "7" plus the other balloons and her gift to her room, since she literally lives out her room.

The Saga is over. One year and One Day... The most Shortest - Longest Relationship from hell

As usual the furbabies were happy to see me "meowing" hey to me. So Im in her room and she reads the birthday card and sees the bag of gifts.. Again, befuddled. I told her I bought the balloons for outside and everything since when her mother and grandmother was alive they would make a big deal out of it.

she's like "oh ok." Not a "Thank You".. but an "oh ok".. She then proceeded to yell at me for my gesture saying "Why can't you people act right" She then proceeded telling me about her ex who came to "get his fuzzy slippers, pajamas and bathrobe" and accused me of "Speaking or talking to him". Mind you I dont know who this person is or who he is. How I went on her Facebook to seek him out since I wanted to be with her on her birthday". Mind you within the whole 2 week span she talks to this person I am dealing with fixing my car (which I got done this morning).

The Saga is over. One year and One Day... The most Shortest - Longest Relationship from hell

As she is yelling at me she throws her soda and small wooden table. And proceeded to shove me and hit me with the balloons and stuffed animal I got. Mind you she's aware of my right leg issues. So as she swings at me I have my hands up to block any more strikes she looses her balance but still stands on her bed and gives me the "deer in headlights look" like "oh wow he is still standing after I struck him and attempted to defend himself".

The Saga is over. One year and One Day... The most Shortest - Longest Relationship from hell

At that stage I left and walked out. I dont know if she blocked me or whatever else. When she 1st choked me and assaulted me with the charger cable, I told my police dept since Im still with them but a different dept. to cover my bases. This I just walked away from.

So I hopefully won't hear from them again (Im out $1700 which I loaned to her, in addition to $300 for the remainder of the cremation expenses for her mom).

The Saga is over. One year and One Day... The most Shortest - Longest Relationship from hell

♫And still I can't believe
I can't believe it's over
Suddenly it's plain to see
She doesn't need me

The Saga is over. One year and One Day... The most Shortest - Longest Relationship from hell
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Most Helpful Girl

  • btbc92
    That is just horrible, and I am sorry you had to go through with all that. My suggestion is just learn from this experience. Even if you have to write this down somewhere for you to actually read a look at. It's not meant for you to go back in just obsess over it. But to understand what to do add an event that you may encounter a similar person. That kind of person needs to go get help. Not only is she fooling herself not to be stable minded, she's been cheating on you. She's very selfish and at that point I think it's best for you not to use those mental health terminology as an excuse. That's just who she is as a person. And until she changes, is it going to be an excuse about why she can't. And it's not because she wants to filter that out, it's because she like the toxicity. Think about it. She decides to conversate with her ex. Why would you want to go back to your ex? When people go back to exes, it tends to be very toxic.

    And I also think that maybe a bit of therapy can help you so that way you can evaluate why did you attract to such a person. Until you figure yourself out you don't know what else you're going to be dealing with in the future. I don't know if you're going to remain accident or celibate. But my suggestion for you is at least give yourself another year or two before you try again.
    Is this still revelant?
    • btbc92

      That relationship sounds like a nightmare.

    • @btbc92 you dont know the half of it

Most Helpful Guy

  • GoodGuyBreakingBad
    Thanks for sharing with us. This was well written and I wish you the best on this matter
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

57
  • You don’t have to put up with that to get a hot girl, or a smart one, there are good people out there who will appreciate what you do for them willing to treat you with kindness. I find basically all abused people underestimate themselves because their abuser tries to dishonestly lower their value to retain control over them.
  • The most amazing part of these relationships is that

    1. people stay with them for so long after it becomes obvious that the person is bat-shit crazy, and

    2. then, they go back for another round after the initial break up.

    Borderline personality girls probably have secret voodoo that they work on guys!
    • @OlderAndWiser this is truly the end with her. I can now totally focus on June and hope *fingers crossed* I do this shit right for the last time...

    • June is LSAT?

    • @OlderAndWiser yup. Hearing shit show horror stories about the last one, since everything is now online, you got proctors from other countries monitoring you and since they have access to your machine, they fuck with your mouse and screw you up. Also they mess with the time clock (this was told in a facebook group) so I got my reservations..

    • Show All
  • Galian84
    So sorry to hear you went through that, but BPD/NPD can be a force of nature... and their rages can be terrifying. If they don't get help, they can be an absolute nightmare.

    Like you, I just got out of a just-over-one-year-long relationship with a man with BPD/NPD traits. While I was with him, I felt like I was in a prison.

    Go take care of yourself and live your best life!
  • UnlovedWife
    You are better off. I hope one day you find someone kind
    • @UnlovedWife Im bitter..

    • I know. I’m in the same boat almost as you. I’m separated from my narc husband but we only filing next year. We also live together because of financial difficulties as I can’t seem to find a job (thanks covid) and he holds it against me all the time. I feel owned and trapped. I feel very bitter towards him. Can you imagine if you were married to that one? I envy you

  • StunningANDbrave
    Why did you willingly go to this nut jobs birthday AFTER you knew she had a mental disorder on top of being physically abusive. Snap the fuck out of it and quit feeling sorry for yourself. Do not date women with metal disorders, it never ends well for men.
  • midnightmoon05
    That is horrible!! I wish you the best moving forward to find love.
    what were some of the early signs? Or red flags..
    the story seems like you two were together for some time by the writing.
    • @midnightmoon05 as my rant is.. One year and one day. Together officially for 5 months. Talking for 2. Covid, plus other parental issues (I help my 85 yr old mom)

  • madgoat
    The violence and indifference confirm walking away was the right decision. 2k loss is small compared getting her pregnant. Take on the learning and choose more wisely next time.
  • Jamie05rhs
    I'm sorry to hear that, man. That bitch was crazy (no offense.). I'm glad you got out of that relationship.
    I believe you will find someone MUCH better; don't worry!
  • I feel you. April 30th Would make 2 years together but always marks 1 year to a month since we broke up.
  • Aakash_Hangargi
    This what heart breaking, but what can we do about Women eh?
  • The_Outlaw
    Dude, trust me. You'll be FAR better off in the long run without her than with her.
  • whatdoyouwantt
    Wow that is really toxic 🚩
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