After 20 years of misstakes, I finally got the essential Red Pill epiphany to actually understand how relationships works between men and women. It's complex, and when I see all the questions here at GAG, they are so familiar to me, and I can often provide an educated answer. So I will dedicate some time here to help the young boys and girls out. My English is a secondary language so please forgive me. Some things may not be totally accurate, and some of it is debatable, but the underlying principles are precise enough.
The evolutionary psycology of girls and boys:
Evolutional theory is based on the concept of survival. If you are strong and capable, you survive, if you are weak and incapable, you die. For every generation of reproduction, this process have continued and evolved through generations of mutation. Each mutation changes the outcome slightly for each generation, and the mutations that gives a benefit for survival will be passed on to the next generation, and the rest will die out. Over millions of years later, we are here today excisting as humans, who are a result of continous mutation of survival skills. Some of those skills are part of our psycology, much of which we share with other mammals from a common ancestor.
Males and females are different. Some of the most important factors are the hormones. Hormones are strong predictors for the outcome of psycology and physiology. Some key factors are:
Ostrogen as the primary hormone enhances:
Interest for people and animals.
Awareness of surroundings.
Building social networks.
Testosterone as the primary hormone enhances:
Will to take higher risk.
Interest for things.
Awareness of moving targets.
Physical strength. (60% higher on the upper body, and 40% on the lower body).
Even though males and females are more similar that different. As in we have two legs, one head, two arms etc. These differences are not relevant for what I want to talk about today. To understand the opposite sex, is about understanding our different survival skills.
Females are physically more vulnerable than men, especially when infants are involved. Therefore females evolved a defensive strategy by building social networks and gain strength in numbers. By becoming more aggreeable and more neurotic, it also made them less likely to take risks, and more likely to be able to nurture a child. So you can say that female nervesystem is targeted for her and her child. And this is the key to what makes a male attractive to a female. Females are attracted to males who gives her and the infant the best possible outcome, Masculine traits: Ambition, socio/economic status, strength, leadership, safety and competance.
Caused by the selection made by the females, men became strong capable hunters and protectors for the tribe. Because the most attractive men, the Alphas, always gets the most offspring and sexual partners. Males are attracted to predictors of health, agreeableness and nurturing skills of the females. Also called femininity.
Rule of thumb:
1. Females are attracted to masculinity, because it gives them the best possible outcome for her and the infant.
2. Males needs to understand the importance of pursuing masculinity, to be attractive to the opposite sex.
3. Males are attracted to femininity, because it is the best predictor for a healthy offspring, and survival of both the female and her offspring.
4. Females needs to understand the importance of pursuing femininity, to be attractive to the opposite sex.
Why is finding a soulmate so difficult now?:
There are many reasons for this.
1. Hypergamy is a mechanism women have in order to pick a high value male. In other words, women are attracted to men who has the same or higher socio/economic status than themselves. This introduces a few problems in todays society. Boys are falling behind girls in school. (Recommend the book, "The Boy Crisis" by Warren Farrell). This makes boys and men on average less attractive, as well as socio/economic status for women increases. This gives women less less potential options for a mate, and it leaves a lot of men without a family.
2. The state have taken over many of mens roles in terms of protecting, and providing resources. The need for men a womans life is therefore reduced.
3. Prevention. Some might hate me for saying this. Women who have had many sexual partners gains a promiscous lifestyle. And this makes her less attractive, and it decreases the likelyhood of a successfull partnership.
4. One-parent households. This is an increasing trend, and is by far dominated by single mothers, who most often are favored custody of the children in family court by 80-90%. I recommend this book again for this: ("The Boy Crisis" by Warren Farrell). Children who grow up in single-mother households are far more likey to gain unfortunate outcomes in terms of crime, suicide, school results etc. It's a massive disadvantage, and most importantly, boys who lacks a male rolemodel are very unfortunate. From a childs perspective, by having both masculinity and femininity present in the household, they benefit from that by observing both sides of the human coin to understand themselves and the way of the world. When you remove one parent, they lose that perspective entirely.
To point this out further. About every school shooting is made by a young male who lacked a proper male rolemodel. When a family lacks a male rolemodel, the sons are more likely to have their male friends as role models, instead of their mother. The best a single mother can do, is to include the father into her sons life if possible, and/or include grandfather, uncles etc.
Also, for young girls. In order to pick a man who doesn't kill, rape, or abuse them. Having a male reference in the family also makes that decisionmaking a bit more clear. If you learned anything from this, it should be about the importance of picking the right partner, because you better stick with him/her untill your child stands on it's own, otherwise you are irresponsible.
5. Feminism is not what it used to be. From the earlier days in the 60's, feminism was about equality of opportunity, giving women the same opportunites as men. And I fully support this, and there are places around the world who still needs it. But in the west, that battle is over, and done. Feminism though, wasn't done, it evolved into something else, promoting "equality of outcome". Having the same opportunities isn't enough anymore. Women must now have the same outcome as men. The problem with this approach is that men and women are different, as stated earlier. We make different life choices which results in different outcomes. Modern feminism is yet another branch of marxism on the mission to eliminate differences between people, which in other words means, eliminating the freedom of choice. Within modern feminism, gender norms and stereotypes are seen as the result of the tyranical patriarchy, which is insane. They've succeded along the way, introducing their views into every medium available. A long story short, it resulted in the woke culture. Men who are woke, blue pilled, or simps, are very unattractive to women, though they don't belive that themselves. But it should be clear by now. Men who aren't masculine, doesn't stand a chance.
Feminism has made a lot of damage, especially by pushing women in to make masculine life choices, making them less attractive as well.
6. Social media plays an important role also. By giving young women the ability to share images and get instant verifications at rapid rates, they now tend to gain unrealistic self image, making them think they are entitled to more attractive men, but in reality they've become more delusional. This raises the bias for male attraction, making more women compete for the top 10% of men. It's referred to as the three sixes. 6" inches, 6 figure income and 6-pack.
If you are a woman who want's men to be great! Read "The Boy Crisis by - Warren Farrell. If you don't understand the state of men, and wonder where all the good men are? Read that book, it might make you light up the torch and demand some change. It's a good read for men as well. But it's important to bring in the women for this cause.
If you are a young man. Read "The Unplugged Alpha" By - Rich Cooper. It's an easy read, and it's based on "The Rational Male" series by - Rollo Tomassi, which is considered to be the Red Pill Bible.. These books are not recommended to females, they are a bit rough on the edges and might be considered distastefull if not read with an open mind. But the books are important for young men. They contain information I wish I had as a young man, I would've been in a better place today. I believe audio books are available as well.