If you gf or bf go through your phone records or msgs...would you be ok with it?

Question

The other day i got a call from my guy colleague's fiance, she saw my name on the recent phone calls on her fiance, my colleague's phone, so she wanted to check who I was...
I think she was suspicious since he called me at late night, but im on a business trip here in Korea so there is a huge time difference, so he had to call me at night, it was really purely related work nothing more. i explained to her all that... 
And she said ok and hung up lol
 just now i got a call from my colleague and he apologized to me lol
It was a bit awkward.
Anyhow, do you think it is ok to go through your gf/bf's phone? Would you let her or him to read your msgs or play with it?

pr3ttyreckl3ss · Accepted Answer

Well she was already checking because she was suspicious that sounds paranoid and a invasion of privacy. I wouldn't have done that, i think it's ok if she was just playing with her bf's phone that's fine i do that all the time with my SO's and he does so with mine, usually together, i'm not checking up on his contacts though lol xD I like to know who his friends are and his friends are mine's anyways, but going through call records that's just snooping i don't look at all his texts seeing every little thing he talk's about to everyone..:/

That's just really unattractive and insecure. I mean if she had reason to be suspicious she at least could have asked him for permission or just been straight up & confronted him. Those people that are just like no you can't see my messages seem a little shady, i mean personally i really don't care either way as long as my SO didn't ask in a demanding or controlling way.

MissDelight · Accepted Answer

I honestly wouldn't care because I have nothing to hide. Now, I prefer that they tell me to my face and ask for my phone IN FRONT OF ME rather than just waiting until I'm gone and snooping. When they do it without being bold about it, then it makes them look nosey, sneaky, and invasive. So yeah, if they have the balls to be sitting down with me and say "How much can I really trust you? Let me go through your phone." I'd hand it over because I have absolutely nothing to hide and I want them to know just how much they can trust me.

Btw, you never know, your colleague could have a history of cheating or he may have been guilty of the beginning stages of cheating by having a female's number in his phone in the past.

FlyingTurtle · Accepted Answer

WOW does anyone else find it ironic that everyone is saying "no I wouldn't let them go through my phone, deal breaker if they ask to" while at the same time saying "they need to trust me"? Like if you have nothing to hide and are completely trust worthy. . . why wouldn't you let them go through your phone? Like, what if your significant other was just curious about who you text regularly, not even suspicious, just curious?
Personally I wouldn't care if my boyfriend asked to go through my phone, I'd say "Sure go ahead, but what you'll fnd will probably bore you lol"

DodgersGM · Accepted Answer

This is a difficult one for me to answer...I'm really conflicted.

On the one hand, I'd have nothing to hide. Like I'm as unflinchingly loyal as they come.

On the other hand, I'd feel really bummed that my S.O. didn't trust me, as I'd feel like I earned that kind of respect.

If this kind of thing were to happen, we'd have to sit down and have a discussion about what's going on, because that kind of distrust wouldn't be good for the relationship, or it'd be a sign that something was off and needed fixing.

myspacemybroke · Accepted Answer

I think it should be a medium. Actually going through your SO's phone to check for unfaithfulness just seems paranoid and petty. Those couples that flip shit when their SO so much as touches their phone just seem a little off though.

MzCoco · Answer

I would be fine with it because I have nothing to hide. My password is my boyfriends name and he always has complete access to it.

That said because of my openness I know he would never actually go through each message. But so what if he does. If he is suspicious of my id like to show him that there's nothing to worry about. Sometimes we all have suspicions that just happen, no evidence is needed to just feel insecure for a bit.

So that said: if you feel the need to go through your significant others phone for reasons other than curiosity, and on a regular basis, & call back numbers the relationship might as well be over. Trust and honesty are absolutely vital to healthy and lasting relationships.

Alanaaa · Answer

i dont think someone should freak out over someone wanting to go through their phone, but I also don't think it should ever even get to that point. If you're going through someones phone/someone wants to go through your phone, you have bigger issues in your relationship than some emails or text messages.

Hannah591 · Answer

I've done it once to my current boyfriend and he knows I did but he didn't really say anything about it because I argued with him over the things I saw. If I hadn't found anything, then maybe he would've had a problem.
I wouldn't like him to go through my messages but it's not the end of the world if he did really. I'm not cheating on him but he'd probably not be happy with some things.

ixi10 · Answer

That is so awkward. What the hell. Why would you be with someone that can't trust you? And to the point where they're calling the people you called? Wow. Speechless.

I would not put up with that. I have nothing to hide but it's about the principle of the matter. That is so not ok to do

princesswitch · Answer

It wouldn't bother me all that much if he went through my phone once or twice, really. At most it'd warrant an eyeroll out of me. It'd be crossing the line for him to be calling people in my contacts, though.

I don't have anything to hide and I know sometimes people feel insecure. I guess it's an invasion of privacy, but for some reason I just don't care...

1932ct · Answer

I don't have anything to hide if she wants to know something just ask me!

now your situation first she doesn't have any business going through his phone it shows a deep level of distrust for a fiance, next is her calling around checking on him like he needs permission and if not she gets involve that BS , not someone I want to stay with let along think about keeping for marriage

THChowder · Answer

No, I have a pattern lock on it. He doesn't look or touch unless I ask him to pass my phone over, that's it.

He trusts me, so he shouldn't have to ask to go through it. That would strain the relationship.

cavmanier · Answer

I'd be okay if she wanted to go through my phone probably. I don't see the point of it though. I wouldn't really like that she doesn't trust me that much though. I hope to be with a girl and in a situation where we are beyond that pettiness.

heartbroke · Answer

I have nothin to hide my password is my b/f birthday and he knows the password we use each others phone all the time but there no reason to go callin someone with no evidence that something is going on

findingdreamland · Answer

I am ok. But i don't see any point to do it. If he is afraid that i am cheating on him, i prefer being asked. Phones , computers etc they are quite personal stuff. I don't like people seeing them.

DragonWolf · Answer

The only thing my phone can is play 456 songs and call, and sent sms. I barely call or sent sms, so there's nothing really interesting for a guy I guess... He can check if he wants.

RedThread · Answer

No this would really bother me.. In fact it would be a deal breaker. I'm loyal in relationships and if she doesn't trust me that's her problem not mine. I don't have time to deal with that level of insecurity.

Anonymous · Answer

I wouldn't like anyone going through my personal messages either. But you would probably be amused how many idiots would be offended by someone they know going through their messages though they could care less if the government is doing it to them, WHICH THEY ARE!

LovelySerene · Answer

I would be offended, cause it proves that he doesn't trust me, I don't do anything bad, but if he has to look through my stuff for proof...then where is the trust?

Prof_Don · Answer

I Don't like that snooping shit...I Don't do anything suspicious so the snooping is purely out of her insecurity, controlling personality, or both. So irritating.

zombiebabe · Answer

i don't mind if he goes through my message or call history since i do this with his phone too...its a sign of trust

bunnahies · Answer

I'm fine with it. I have nothing to hide. He reads my stuff on Gag and approves of my comments :o

Keyspirits · Answer

The only time when i dont let her go through ma phone is if i flirt with other chix :3
Other than that, she can go through it with no prob. Someone who doesn't let u go through it can be suspicious and hiding something...hmm
Like meh xD

questioner1991 · Answer

It would be annoying but then again if they want to go through it it would start more drama to say no than to just let them go through it.

KLTheErudite7229 · Answer

I will not allow anyone going through my phone or any other personal stuff. It is MY LIFE and MY STUFF (NOT HERS).

lkjhg69cum · Answer

Fuck no, if she is that paranoid, then she had better hit the road. That's BS. I wouldn't stand for that crap.

meeemza · Answer

I don't like the concept on not trusting... but I would not mind... in fact the phone would be disposable she would be able to see things without me knowing... in general if i have nothing to hide it should not be a problem

JustinCaseUDontKnow · Answer

No, if a couples both trust worthy no need to do any snooping on each others cell phone records

knotme · Answer

I would if it eased his mind; then we would have a talk because that's a huge trust issue

kangaru2 · Answer

It isn't fine for my bf to go through it unless I allow him even if we are couple we should have our own privacy

Anonymous · Answer

I dont care. I had an ex who just snooped for the hell of it. She just liked to go through my room because she didn't know what she would find. Good thing she didn't find the body under my bed though.

MaskofInsanity · Answer

It would bother me. I have nothing to hide, but I want my privacy respected. All my conversations on my phone are between me and that person, and not for anyone else to read.

NoblesseOblige · Answer

That is sketchy as fuck. That guy needs a new proper gf who doesn't do embarrassing shit that like.

Anonymous · Answer

No there has to be trust there and if there is not I would be out you know I don't like those kind of games.

queen-b · Answer

For me its ok , i have nothing to hide, and id tell my man who everyone in my contacts are , so he would know ,

Anonymous · Answer

Wel as a girl and i suspect something i will probably have the urge to go through his phone. But nowadays everyone has iphone and have codes on it so when he he won't let me go through his phone i automatically assume he's hiding something

Sexualchrist · Answer

I would because I have nothing to hide, I'm not cheating so she won't find any messages like that. I even let her look at my pics, stuff I've downloaded if you know what i mean.

GoldCobra · Answer

If I had a girl, I wouldn't go through her shit to see if she's cheating. I wouldn't mind if she went through my shit. I got nothing to hide.

Anonymous · Answer

Absolutely not. That is definitely crossing the line.

missalbanian92 · Answer

No I really wouldn't be with them if I didn't trust them

rgb008 · Answer

No way, instant deal breaker.

chocolateismylover · Answer

Honestly, I wouldn't care.

Eternallylucky · Answer

No, cos it's my phone.

Anonymous · Answer

I'm not that controlling. :)

apropos · Answer

No.

If you gf or bf go through your phone records or msgs...would you be ok with it?

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