My boyfriend never compliments me - does he just not fancy me that much?

[Heather01]

My boyfriend of about 5 months hardly ever compliments me and it's really getting me down. I thought he was proud of me because he's always taking me to family gatherings and asking me to hang out with his friends, but afterwards he NEVER says "well done" or "they liked you" or anything. He never says anything. I feel like I try really hard to be sociable and energetic but he never comments on anything I do- for better or worse.

I've tried giving him lots of positive feedback in the hope that he'll reciprocate, but it has not worked. I want to confront him, but then he'll think/know I'm insecure, and I think the reason he likes me so much is because he thinks I'm a confident girl.

I worry I'm not good enough for him because he never says anything nice about my body or during sex. I'm used to guys making me feel confident, but he's just making me seriously insecure. If he's not saying anything good, does he just not think I'm that great? Be honest, please.

[Paris13]

It's probably just in his nature to feel he doesn't have to pay anyone a 'compliment,' and has probably not been brought up to do so, being his family is most likely the kind of family that may not even bother doing it neither. I would feel hurt myself...And not because I am 'insecure', it's just the Education of Etiquette.
Perhaps you could start teaching him a lesson or two by 'Complimenting' Him once in awhile, and also Ask a question on your behalf that would require that you were 'fishing for compliments.' He may get the hint and start throwing you a few your way.
If all else fails, then chalk this up as he couldn't give Anyone a compliment if his life depended on it.
Good luck.xx

[Paris13]

I see where his parents Do Do this..Maybe he is also not the gushy kind to do it...No, I think he Does like you, so this would be his 'complementary' way of showing you he is proud to be with you as well. May be hard to throw a compliment...xx

[evelyn071392]

Maybe you're just too good for him & he's the one that feels intimidated. You should actually talk to him face to face. Tell him how you feel & listen to his feelings as well. I never heard of your situation before. Very interesting. He does take you out in public so it can't be that he's ashamed of you. I recommend talking to him. I wish you luck.

[Heather01]

Thank you for your advice. I guess I just worry if it's one of those "if you've got nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all" situations. Loathed to bring it up with him but I guess I'll have to...

[evelyn071392]

You two have been together for 5 months. That's a decent amount of time. But maybe he is shy like Keyspirits said. Maybe he doesn't know how to compliment people. Maybe he wasn't raised to give positive feed back. How is his family like? How do they treat you?

[Heather01]

I don't know because he talks about his friends with real positivity - he's a very opinionated guy and is passionate with his emotions otherwise. He just never seems to direct them my way...

[Anonymous]

The best compliment I've gotten from my boyfriend is 'you have nothing to be ashamed of' regarding my body and that was said once. I think some guys aren't so good with the talking and emotions.

[Heather01]

Haha christ, that's diplomatic. My friend once phoned me in tears saying her boyfriend had just said to her "I love kissing your robust flesh"

[Opinion Owner]

It bothers me a little until I remember my compliments suck as well. So yeah.

[Opinion Owner]

I once told him I liked him cow lick was cute because it made his hair poof weirdly.

[cudaboy]

Just my thoughts but if he is taking you to family stuff and asking you to hangout with him and his friends thats a big complement in itself. When your with his family, do you see his father complementing his mom. That is usually a good indication on what he will do on complements. In general most guys do complements and such with actions not words.

[Heather01]

Yeah that's what I initially thought and I am very happy he wants me to spend time with his loved ones, but now it's been a while it's starting to grind me down. He parades me around all these social events and I try so hard to get on with everyone but he never thanks me for it. His parents are complimentary of each other and are very sweet.

[cudaboy]

If he is parading you around then your the "trophy girlfriend" in my opinion.

[Keyspirits]

Not apparently sum guys are afraid and embarrass to share their feelings. Sum are juz shy to show it cuz i know im one of them but yeah dats kinda odd dat he never complimented u. By now i guess i wouldve eventho im not the type of person to do so. I'd say it cuz i adores her and luv her to death.

[Heather01]

Maybe he just doesn't like me that much :(

[Akwardgirl12]

maybe your boyfriend is nervous about complimenting you and thinks you will get offended that he messed up on saying his compliment.

[Metal189]

Have you tried complimenting him?

[Heather01]

Yes and it hasn't worked. He seems to mildly appreciate compliments but never returns them...

[Metal189]

has he ever done it?