Girls night out on my birthday. Boyfriend hates it. HELP?

[alicewhite]

So I was thinking about having a girls night out on my birthday. A mini party at my place than go out "clubbing" afterwards. I have hinted this idea to my boyfriend and he doesn't like it at all, thinks it is unfair almost and wants to meet me while me and the girls are clubbing. I am trying to understand why he thinks this, but I don't really understand his reasoning, cause he goes out with his friends often and I am perfectly okay with that.

It has been times where I have been hit on by other guys while we have been clubbing together, where he has felt the need to protect me and keep me away from all that stuff, but this time it is so innocent and I never see my friends. I want to convince him, but how? I would never cheat on my boyfriend. I would be a fool to do so.

[thecd1979]

I have been in this scenario before with a girlfriend from a long time ago. Try and see things from his point of view in that you are going to be in a place with a bunch of horny single guys who's ultimate goal is going to be to take you home and get laid and he's not going to be there to fight them off. It's not something any boyfriend is going to be comfortable with regardless of what level of trust that might already be established between y'all. It certainly wasn't something I was comfartable with my GF doing back then. I am sure he trusts you, but not the guys that are going to be trying to get with you.

[alicewhite]

I understand this and I see your point and his, but he is also have been in the same situation many times. girls aren't that shy anymore. He often goes clubbing with the guys, and there are many horny girls there that wants something, and don't care if a attractive guy has a girlfriend. I am uncomfortable sometimes, but I let him cause I trust him, and just keep myself occupied through the day and accept it. He should to.

I really want him to understand that this is only once, and that I will make it up to him (anything he desires). I just want this day for myself.

[OJbrown]

Okay, I think he just wants to be with you on your birthday and I dont see how that's so crazy. But if your heart is set on the girls night out thingy then you have to make a plan to make it up to him some other day. That will help him realise that he is still number one with you and you just need some time with your girls just for tonight.

[OJbrown]

Oh and happy birthday

[alicewhite]

no. of course not. I understand, but I am not actually having my birthday party on my actual birthday. my actual birthday is on Thursday. He is welcome that day, but at my party Saturday. I just want to mingle with my girlfriends that I haven't seen for 2 months, and some of them for 2 years.

I always make it up to him, and will this time if he really needs it. I just want for the first time, have a girls night out where I don't need to see him afterwards at the club.

haha, Thank you ;-)

[OJbrown]

Okay, tell him all that u just wrote down. Emphasize that you will make it up to him (because he will need it ). Just talk calmly and feed his ego. He'll let u go. good luck😉

[alicewhite]

thank you. I need all the luck I can get :-)

[TheEmma]

Don't ask for permission, just let him now you're gonna do it. If he can go out with his friends, so can you. He can't control you. He'll need to get over his jealousy, that's not your problem. If he says anything, tell him that if you trust him enough and don't get mad when he goes out, the least you expect is that he does the same.

[nert73]

Just tell him what you said in the question about him going out with his friends and you being ok with it. Also, say something about how you'll be with your friends and you can all trust each other and that you'll be ok going one night without his protection. Assure him that he can trust you and make sure he trusts your friends.

[alicewhite]

thank you. I will do this :)

[nert73]

Ok you're welcome :-) I hope that helps :-)

[doodler0706]

Make sure you approach him cautiously because this could turn into a huge argument. its not even the fact that it's your bday. It's just pain and simple you want a girls night out. if he's allowed to then you should be able to as well. he's probably just insecure so make sure you assure him that nothing is going to happen.

[alicewhite]

Thank you! I will. he knows I am not that type of girl. I talked about it to him today, it was a bit of a awkward tension afterwards, even if we both were calm in the situation. . so

[doodler0706]

You're welcome. and it's good that you guys are communicating even if it is awkward.

[jshiloh25]

he is being a big baby. Do what you want, it's your b day. He doesn't always have to be there and you shouldn't always do what he says either. A relatinship is mutual if you want a girls night out and go to a club then do it.

[jshiloh25]

He should trust you enough to know that you would never cheat on him. Trust is very important.

[alicewhite]

thank you. this is good answer. I think and though he trusted me. he will probably just say that he doesn't trust them (guys).

[jshiloh25]

And that is very true because I don't trust most guys around the girl that I'm with also. But I trust her and I know she won't cheat on me. so yes he has the right to be cautious about the guys and is completly normal but he needs to trust you.

[trojanDevil]

It is tough actually. He is a part possessive about you. Just talk to him and convince him that you love him at all costs and he needs to open up and give you some space. And maybe you guys can meet seperately at any other location that day.

[alicewhite]

thank you. I will actually try this :)

[Betwyn]

If his issue is because it is your birthday.. maybe he has a case..

if his issue is the "girls night"

see @Error_204 's answer

[alicewhite]

I am gonna ask him about this! :P

[Error_204]

You can't. Fuck him; his paranoia is not your problem.

[Red_Arrow]

At least part of it is that he wants to celebrate with you on your birthday, too.

[Anonymous]

Maybe he wants to meet ur friends, he might be thinking about u know meeting up with them.

[alicewhite]

hehe, he can meet my friend another day. he knows my friend. he have meet all of them.

[Opinion Owner]

Maybe he doesn't trust u then. maybe there might be men over there too could be possible or he doesn't have plans that day so he wants to spend ur b-day with u