Girls, would you break up with your BF if he was sterile?

[Anonymous]

He has alredy given up on the idea of having kids. A surrogate is not an option. So would you break up with your BF if you found out he was sterile? And when would be the best time to tell you?

Break up

Stay

[kaylaS91]

No, I don't think so. That's a tough situation to be in. If I found out after we were already together, I'd probably remain with him, regardless.
I'm sort of in a similar situation. Not that I want to have kids or get married anytime soon. My boyfriend told me he never wants either in an offhand comment. Caught me by surprise... Makes me wonder if I should stay with him any longer, put more of my time & emotions into something that I guess doesn't have much long-term potential.

I'd get over the kids thing much easier. Tell her as soon as possible. The earlier she finds out, the more reasonable of a decision she'll be able to make, and will also get the least irritated.

[RationalLioness]

I'm fine with that. I have no problem being with a guy that's sterile. It's not that I don't want kids, but I don't care if I have them or not.

If he's sterile, we can do a lot of things together like travel. And I think it would be best to admit it sometime during the relationship... when we're getting really serious.

[Asker]

So you don't think he should mention it until later in the relationship?

[RationalLioness]

Right. What's the point of mentioning it early when you don't know how long you'll be with her?

[SoldiersWoman]

Adoption is an option! But personally I would look at the benefits, yes some people really want kids but having kids can also make it difficult to stay close to your partner. If you don't have kids you can be spontaneous! You CAN go on that weekend gettaway! You CAN have sex on the living room floor! You can live a full and exciting life with your partner and you shouldn't need kids to make you happy. Why would you leave the person you WANT to have kids with just because you can't have your own?

[Mustachekitteh]

My boyfriend already said he doesn't really want to have kids in his future. Which I don't really care. That just means more time in life to spend money on trips to see the world and anything else you might want to do.

[Bandnerd9]

If I was older and it was a serious relationship I would be upset at first. But I think that if I truly loved him I would stay. It's not his fault that he is sterile. For me personally I would like to know right away

[Asker]

That's very mature and generous of you. You sound like a much better person, and a better partner than some of the older women on here. I'm glad you have set such a great attitude at such a young age :)

[Bandnerd9]

Thank you ☺️

[purpleballoons456]

No I wouldn't. That's not his fault and I'm also not too crazy about the idea of kids anyway. I would like to have them, but I would be OK if I didn't. If I love him it wouldn't matter.

[Asker]

That's a great attitude to have. Thankyou for sharing your opinion

[BellePepper]

I don't want kids so a guy being sterile is like a cherry on top for me. It's like the guy is already great but then he can't have kids? Total bonus.

[Asker]

That's awesome! Thanks :)

[freyaboisselle]

I'm indifferent about having kids so I'd stay. If one day we decide that we do want a kid then we could always adopt.

[Asker]

That's cool, thanks for sharing :)

[CrazyMinta]

If he wouldn't agree to other option. I would leave his ass as soon as he revealed this. I have dreams and one of those is having a family, with a little army. If he truly loved me he wouldn't make me give up my dream for him. In my reasoning.

[LonelyLillie13]

its not a deal breaker but would you consider a sperm doner? This would make it more likely that you will meet someone, or you'll have to find someone who wants no kids ever. But think about what is stopping you, because while you've been deprived naturally its unfair to push that on someone else.

[Asker]

I said surrogates are not an option. I don't really want kids to begin with, let alone kids that aren't even mine

[LonelyLillie13]

well to me that is like taking what happened to you and knowing all the hurt and forcing it on someone. It is selfish, but your choice and you will just have to look harder and be prepared for many to say "No thanks" .

[Asker]

What the hell? Its not my fault I'm fuckin sterile. How can you blame me for forcing it on someone else?

That's so incredibly shallow and insensitive...

[LonelyLillie13]

yes but your not allowing someone who is your partner to have a sperm donor so that they can have a child. That is what it is.

[LonelyLillie13]

you by saying, "you can't carry a child as long as your my wife" for example is in fact forcing them to never have a child, thats all im saying.

[Asker]

I'm not forcing her to do anything. If she loved me enough she'd stay. But she always has the option to leave.

[Asker]

But I'm just gonna totally disregard your opinion because i can't see myself getting involved with someone so shallow, selfish, and close-minded as yourself.

[LonelyLillie13]

whatever dude

[Sara413]

I'd actually be relieved because I don't want kids!

[Asker]

Great! Thanks :)

[AshaLou]

Yes. Children are a deal breaker for me. They may not be for some women, but for me personally, I won't carry on a relationship with someone who can't or won't have children.