PLEASE HELP. I’m struggling: best friend becomes “friends with benefits” without sex?

audrey080
I’m single. A few weeks ago my best friend (guy, single) asked me what I think about kissing/making out with a friend. I told him that it’ll be a bit weird to kiss someone that’s not my boyfriend I am afraid that I will have feelings for guys if I hook up with them. Both of us are not looking for a relationship. He thinks I’m cute and attractive.

We hang out a lot then he kissed me on the cheek randomly, that was a total surprise for me (and I blushed obviously). He said it’s just an affection but by knowing him, everything he says is jokey/“jokey”, I am really confused what he meant.

Then we started making out and I felt so guilty about it but it was nice at the same time. After a few times of making out, he started grabbing by butt and my boobs and asked if I get turned on by that. Then a few days later he started going down there, fingering me. He asked of he could do something different, so he gave me a bj. We haven’t had sex yet and don’t think we will soon. And we did not even conform to each other if we are in a “fwb” situation. (friends with benefits without sex)

We are best friends in public and LOTS of his friends asked him if we’re going out (we aren’t). He knows that people think that and he said “it doesn’t matter what people think, I’m not surprised” I started to develop feelings for him (I hinted him) but he said, “Well whether it’s a crush or not who cares, we aren’t going into a relationship so lets just play it out and see what happens, thats how I’m looking at it”. There is no drama between us and everything we know stays between us.

And again, he’s my best friend I don’t know what to do :(
PLEASE HELP. I’m struggling: best friend becomes “friends with benefits” without sex?
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