It could be anything. Whenever I hear a woman say that she's "too strong", that men find her "intimidating", or that men "can't handle her", usually there's just something about her that's really annoying and off-putting. It's not that men find her intimidating at all, she's either just annoying or she's a pain in the ass to deal with.
The reason they're annoying is usually that they're very argumentative over small things, or they like to sort of show off how intelligent they are by trying to get the last word if that makes sense? And it's like you can't have a normal conversation with them, everything is a debate or a game of trying to "one-up" the other. Obviously I don't know much about you, but there's that.
So what do you mean by naturally dominant?
Most alpha guys (I don't really like the term "alpha" but I get what you mean by that) want a girl who is feminine. Not necessarily submissive, just not one that tries to be the boss. My girlfriend is very strong-minded, dominant in some ways and not afraid to speak her mind to anybody, but she's still feminine. I would say I'm more of the leader in the relationship and unless she really disagrees with something she lets me take the lead - a woman as I described would probably be a pain in the ass about all sorts of things just because.
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You say you're a dominate woman, but dominance is a masculine trait. Obviously you haven't given any details, but it sounds maybe you're trying to be the man in the relationship?
Most women enjoy a guy being assertive and having a plan during a date, but I once came across a woman who accused me of always needing to be in charge simply because I suggested we go outside for a walk, and later that we go for a drive.
Not sure if that's what you mean when you say you're dominant, but that wasn't earning her any points. If you want to be in a relationship with a man who acts like a man, then you need to be a woman who acts like a woman. That's not to say you can never play the dominant role, but if you're doing it often enough to make the guy feel like a woman then you will attract guys who act like women.
I'm in a similar boat. My personality comes across as bold and some describe it as domineering. I describe myself as socially "dominant" but intimately submissive. I do find that because of my personality I also attract very passive men as a result.
All you can do is keep trying, and make it known what your preferences are. If they can't live up to it then all you can do is move on.
"I'm a dominant woman who is attracted to dominant men"
What do you mean by dominant?
Whenever a woman describes herself as "dominant" she usually exudes masculine traits (personally, not physically). Problem is dominant/masculine men won't go for "dominant" woman. They'll go for their compliment, which is submissive/feminine woman since people attract their compliments.
Because most people don't want to fight all the time. This junk about being "put in your place" is silly. You're a grown up - if you're of line take responsibility for yourself!!
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First, stop classifying Men as either Alpha or Beta. If you ever meet a guy who calls himself an Alpha Male, run. Run as far away as possible because it means he's secretly a giant bitch. Also, this isn't Huxley's "Brave New World" we're living in here, so drop the dumb ass labels for starters. The reason you can't find a "strong man", as you put it, is because you've made up some kind of ideal in your head of this guy you want to be with. Can you define what you mean by a dominant man? Because I'm sure you and every other girl out there who wants a dominant man has at least a slightly different definition. I also don't believe that you want a guy who will "put you in your place" because that would make you less dominant. You want someone challenging? how about trying to make it work with a 'submissive' guy? or is that too challenging? If you want to date an asshole just find some white trash idiot from the south. They'll treat you like shit, fuck your brains out, and leave you with the kids while they go out drinking and mudding with their bros. You could also go hit up the douchiest local frat house. Ask them if they consider themselves dominant men.
What you're doing wrong is having expectations. You take every person for who they are, not what you want them to be. Also, just because someone else is different from you, doesn't meant they are 'Beta' or 'submissive' (just want to clarify that). Sometimes people just aren't in to showing their cards immediately. Sometimes you don't know what you like until you find it. However, I can't convince you of anything, only you can.2 things on this:
1/ Are you SURE you're open to a dominant man? Think back to how you reacted when a man DID "put you in your place"-how did you handle it? I'm very dominant and I notice with dominant women-it's just not worth my time usually, they're too much work. They're so busy in a control battle that they are exhausting. I don't want a woman that wants a power struggle all the time. Now what I find is that most (and really nearly all in my experience but I hate qualifiers like "all, never" etc.) dominant women that are ALSO insecure are the difficult ones-ie "high maintenance". I have ONE dominant girlfriend who I get along with because she is NOT insecure. She doesn't tell me not to have female friends, she doesn't get jealous, and she doesn't freak out on me when I call her out on her shit-she actually listens -it's very mutual. It's not a struggle at all. So the security issue comes to mind as that's the thing I find lacking in MOST dominant women-the dominance is more of a front for their insecurities underneath. I still find them attractive, I still have sex with them, I still TRY to have a relationship with them, but they end up running me off with shit like fake breakups and other control mechanisms that simply DO NOT WORK on alpha men, we lose all respect for them when they pull such low level tactics that work GREAT on... beta men. ie change up your game and you'll KEEP a dominant man if you attract one (if you do such things).All I read in your post above is "I" , "Me" , "I'm", "Challenge Me" , Me , Me , Me, Oh my God woman, what is wrong with you, why aren't you getting in relationships in the first place when all you want is "for yourself" without taking anything in account about the other person.
Since you are so dominant and an Alpha woman and you seem to attract all the Beta men right? Could it be that the problem is you thinking your alpha, while your not even beta.
"I need someone who will challenge me and put me in my place when need be"
Well as for that, have you tried calling Mr. Grey from fifty shades of grey, he's the alpha your looking for. Give him a call.tbh im kinda tired of women who say "i need a man to put me in my place" or "i need a man who can tame me" Seriously, you're a grown ass woman. Keep yourself tame and in control, as you expect from the men you're presumably dating. I mean, how alpha can a girl be if she needs a guy to manage her like some wild cage animal? I believe that like often attracts like. An alpha man probably has enough brains to seek out a woman who will create artificial arguments/problems. A beta man however will put up with that crap, which is probably why you attract them. Just my opinion
Firstly, the word 'beta' is so wrong, irrelevant and insulting to men. There is no alpha, beta or gamma men.
I get your frustration. Why don't you try approaching these 'wrong' men yourself? It also makes you look bold and dominant, and increases the chances of them being attracted to you!Hahha oh I feel you on the challeging part. I'm unsure what to tell you but everyday is a new day. It takes what 15 minutes to meet and talk with a new guy you just met. They are what 960 minutes in a day that your around an about (I took out 8 hours for beauty sleep haha) it only takes 1.56% of your day to meet and talk to a new guy.
Its the personality of what's "holding" you back I think. You want someone who is dominant but you are dominant outside the bedroom you may clash in life so maybe dominant dudes by you aren't attracted to you. So maybe that's why I'm unsure lol. I think two dominant behaviors would be awesome youd push each other, in a good way and challenge. I love independent strong women. They know what they want and go get it. But that's me.And what makes you think you're a dominant woman, what makes you a dominant woman? What's to say dominant is not being a bitch? Also what kind of dominant men you desire? What it means to be dominant can vary depending on women. That said what ELSE do you have to offer apart from you're "dominant".
"I need someone who will challenge me and put me in my place when need be."
Challenge how, put you in your place when/why?Men in general are pussies today in comparison to your grandparents generation. Try searching in better places. Former military.. law enforcement.. fire fighters etc.
The men you're looking for probably aren't interested in dating women like you. Dominant men like submissive women.
Why? "I am a woman with a naturally dominant personality"
Why would a dominant guy try to make a dominant woman turn different? It's pointless.how would you work with a dominant man? you'll fight him
i think a beta, passive guy is best for youNo alpha will go through the trouble to sleep with a dominant women. Only betas will put up with your behavior
you are perverted. so perverte things happen in your life. the law of causality.
Because opposites attract. You have a "naturally dominant personality" and they have a beta submissive personality. Act more beta in order to attract an alpha man.
The dominant women that I've known in my life where never able to keep a man, and are on there 5 or 6th marriage.
You're not a true alpha woman if you need to have a man putting you in your place. You're still beta.
"and put me in my place when need be."
So you want someone to play the role of your dad? That's creepy honestly.I don't understand. If you're looking for a guy to put you in your place you sound more like a beta female. An alpha female doesn't want men being above them.
Those personalities will clash. One has to be the submissive
dominant men are not attracted to dominate women.
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