I feel like my boyfriend is a lot smarter than me and I feel inferior, how do I get over this feeling?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend is a lot smarter than me, he went to private school while I went to public school. He has a lot of knowledge about every subject; geography, math, mechanics, cooking, memes, you name it. basically just anything you can think of he has extensive knowledge about. I know some things but not as much as him and I feel like I'm not even worthy of being loved by him because I can't even cook a fucking fettuccini alfredo right and he has to help me out. How can I get over these feelings of being inferior?

[Bvroon]

The first and biggest question I have for you, is do you love each other? If you do and you can accept each other for the way you are, then the rest doesn't really matter all that much. I say this because I consider my wife smart, however she struggles with school, we both earned our Associates degrees together, and then we planned to earn our Bachelors together, and while it is true we started together I'm afraid to say we did not finish together, I earned mine and then have gone on to earn two Masters degrees as well. I guess my point is while I did excel in school I don't feel it makes her any less my wife or love of my life, and not unlike your own situation, I know a lot about a great many subjects, but we still never lack for things to talk about and we have now been together for about 15 years. Perhaps your skills lie in other things and that is ok. My wife can sew, and she likes to sometimes work on cars. Me not so much, so despite our differences we still find plenty of common ground. It is this common ground that we have built both a relationship and life together. :-)

[Tyrantboy]

Your boyfriend seems similar to me. I read a lot of non-fiction like news, politics, quora, etc daily (it's a habit my dad instilled in me). This is one of the reasons why I can never be caught off guard and pretty much talk about any subject. Also I kinda have a weird memory where I'll remember things that happened years ago like from some documentary or magazine. My girl doesn't rea much except a book or some poem every now and then. I tease her at times but she doesn mind. Honestly it's ok, I dont mind if you dont know as much

[Sevai]

You just have to realize that he is with you because he truly does love you... Haha maybe he doesn't want a scientist for a girlfriend xD maybe he finds women that are that smart to be annoying or "competition" to his brains. And sometimes *whisper* guys find girls that make mistakes rather adorable. Like a puppy that adorably fell into a basket of laundry. Its just freaking cute, okay *lol*... So realize that you are adorable to him, and there is nothing he is holding back (If he is holding something back, that is a sign of unhealthy relationship because in a relationship, there has to be communication in order for it to function properly. He has to let you know how he feels. Maybe ask him one day..) So yeah! Hope this helped you out a bit... Its at least what I would think since I am equally as dumb when it comes to cooking ;-; lol

[dany_dating]

I recently read this quote that should sum it up for you: You cannot call a fish stupid for being able to climb a tree.

If it's a good relationship, then there is obviously balance. He may be smart in those areas but you are making your contribution in your own way. If it still bothers you, then go learn stuff but do it cause you want to get better, not cause you want to match up to him.

[dany_dating]

"You cannot call a fish stupid for NOT being able to climb a tree."

[Anonymous]

Start with learning how to correctly use semicolons. Following a semicolon should be a statement that can stand alone. I believe a colon would be appropriate in your sentence.

I'm actually kidding lmao why be with a guy who makes you feel dumb I would leave his ass

[IronStark107]

If you don't have confidence you are on the road of your relationship ending.
Firstly intelligence should not be measured by being able to know a lot of trivial pursuit facts. Intelligence is based on competence in a certain area. There are many different kinds of intelligence as well. I know people who aren't articulate at all who are geniuses with numbers. People can be very stupid in one thing and smart in the other. You've got to be confident in what you're good at or you'll never have a working relationship.
Also, there area a lot of smart people who go to public school and a lot of dumb people who got to private school. That shouldn't be a measurement of intelligence.

[ProbablyTooMature]

So what if he is smarter/better educated. How is that bad? It's rare (to say the least) that both in a relationship are equally intelligent. If you want to work on your insecurities read lots of educational material, watch educational shows, etc. Take steps to better yourself instead of just wallowing in your own misery.

[GingerGuy]

Don't focus/think about it. It's not important. Relationships are based (or should be) on love, not your looks, how smart you are or if you can cook. Chances are he does not care about any of that and loves you the way you are. If you need that reassurance from him then talk to him about it.

[Bananaman177]

Fettuccini Alfredo is a difficult dish for anybody, that sauce is murder. Takes over an hour to do the sauce alone, and it's HARD WORK, plus the noodles, plus chicken or whatever, and it's all gotta be timed! I think you should share these feelings with your boyfriend, believe it or not. Tell him exactly what you just told us. Also:
"When you're up against a smart opponent, do something irrational and make them think themselves to death."
-C. J. Cherryh

[CisScum]

I wouldn't think that, I mean everyone will always have different levels of intelligence no matter what. You should be lucky you're with such a smart dude instead of an idiot, intelligent people are usually the people you want to find for a relationship. If he loves you and you love him, then you shouldn't worry at all.

[LifeEqualsLove]

Use it as an opportunity to learn more things: CNN, PBS, The news or educational documentaries.

If he is with you though, he must not really care about that. He probably feels great knowing someone is learning from him!

[springocelot]

i'm sure you are interesting in your own right
smartness is not limited to book knowledge
ask him what he finds interesting about you
is there something you're good at that he is not?
otherwise, always work on yourself and your interests

[SongBird3]

Do u love him because he's smart or because of everyother trait he has. Im sure he loves you for your traits too, smart or not.

[alfredolego]

Search tutorials online and use youtube videos to learn new things you love. you'll get more knowledge that way

[Theodorable]

I can't spell fettuccini alfredo... so you're obviously pretty smart.

[skeptic002]

GOD and ancient history
lets see how much he really knows

[Anonymous]

Find what your better at or work on yourself. Especially your self esteem as it seems low

[blondfrog]

Well as long as he doesn't patronize you you shouldn't feel bad.

[Tammybear]

Maybe learn some cool facts or think about things you do better than he does. We all have our strengths and you do too!

[Anonymous]

Don't mind it. We MALES should be superior to females ;)

[DrTruth]

Do anal.

[Tarvold]

Learn?

[Daynada]

Cook something else