So was I wrong for breaking it off?
I broke up with my girlfriend because I don't want see myself marrying a bisexual girlfriend, am I wrong?
So was I wrong for breaking it off?
I think you're putting way too much thought in to the "sex" part - knowing that her sexual interests lie with women as well as men. That, or you are afraid that her sexuality will have people presuming that you are in for threesomes and multiple partners. You want a "nice, normal relationship". Well, unfortunately, there are very few like that, and we all have our good and bad we learn to live with each other. If she was perfectly compatible with you, you might have lost a good girl. Her being bisexual doesn't necessarily mean she would have pushed threesomes on you, wanted to cheat with another woman - no more than a straight girl who might be interested in other men. I still think there is a lot more stigma with the LGBT community that people are hung up on - and it almost always has to do with the sex part. People are just obsessed with it. For so many years, LGBT were considered perverts, and it seems now with our struggle to try and make people aware that they simple find attraction and love outside their gender - people still can't stop thinking about their sex lives.
What is a bit odd with your case is you were together for four years. Did you not know this four years ago?
Her being bi-sexual is only a small part of her overall being. It seemed pretty selfish to me, because you two were together for 4 years. That's a hella long time. You two kinda wasted a lot of time. Shouldn't you have already known her "sexual preferences" earlier in the relationship? Could have saved you maybe...3...3 1/2 years.. I don't know maybe.
I understand the whole "preference" thing and having the right to date whoever you please but my question is why is being bi-sexual such a deal breaker for you? If you dated her for 4 years, you two obviously had a good thing going (or just stayed together for kicks). It seems very odd to me.
I don't want to marry her because I don't want to be stuck marrying a bi girl. It'll be better if my kids look at their own mother dating men and not dating both genders !
#1. nothing wrong for breaking up due to something you know bothers you. its good to do that as soon as possible. which leads to
#2. you keep saying yo should not have wasted your time but at lest you have moved on. the point is you wasted HER time knowing she is bi and knowing it was an issue for you all along--why?
i'm sure that is why she got angry. you came with it out of no where as she's always been bi and you've always known. its like if suddenly she says she's leaving you bc you plan to get married when she knew from the beginning. though maybe you did not realize it mattered so much?
Her sexuality matters more than her lashing out and that is why I broke up with her.
You weren't wrong at all. I can understand it. She was hurt and freaked, but later on she needs to understand that it is something that you couldn't do and needs to respect that. I would do the same thing honestly. She will be an "opinionphobe" if she doesn't grow to understand it, assuming you explained. You weren't wrong. It would be like marrying someone who was kleptomaniac. They can't help it, but you can't handle it. It's better now than later. Don't beat yourself up about it, you're going to be in a world of hurt for breaking up anyways.
I have broken up with/dumped girls before because I found out that they were bisexual. I want a woman that is into me and only me. Bi girls simply can't be trusted, they are sluttier than straight girls and they will always have a desire to have sex with another girl when they're in a relationship with a guy. That's just all there is to it, bi girls can't be satisfied by sticking with one gender and will eventually want both at the same time. I'm not into open relationships, so the second I find out my girlfriend is bi I break up with her. The worse type of bi girls are the ones that wait to tell you, they want to rope you in and get you to have feelings for them, then they spring it on you and confess that they're bi after you've already gotten attached to them. That's just low down...
You are in the right to not want a relationship with her because she would always have other unfulfilled desires and eventually cheat. Bi people can't be faithful/exclusive for a life long relationship.
Somehow many of them don't even consider it cheating when they are with their own gender.
Once you knew she was bi though, you should have ended it right then because it was wrong to waste her time if you weren't going to stay together.
Yeah it was kinda wrong and I could've gotten my time back but I moved on with my life and hopefully getting into another relationship with a girl who isn't so gayish.
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i mean dude it was four years and i assume she's been bit for longer that just a day or two so u knew for this entire period of time and just now saying u can't cope so you're wrong for draggin it out but as far as not marrying a bi girl no thats ur right to not marry a person who like both sides... the same right that allows them to like both sides also allows you not to stay with them its your preference whos to say your wrong for not liking it.
No one exactly and yes, it's my preference.
Exactly. These girls are over their heads nowadays.
It's better than divorcing her in the future because you can't live with it. It sucks now but if it's something you can't handle then you can't handle it. It just would've been better to not let it get to this point. Or did you just find out she's bi?
It shouldn't be a problem if they are commited to you and you alone, are you worried she will one day not want you and skip off with a girl?
Yeah kinda. You can't compete with a women and women are more beautiful than men.
They can be but if she loves you then she must find you attractive, just love her to your fullest and don't worry, lots of relationships are temporary but you don't think it at the time, she chose you too remember that.
I don't think you were wrong for ending it, I just think you should have done it earlier. the longer you stayed with her the more you got her hopes up for something more. then you crushed them by ending things.
No, there's nothing wrong with choosing not to settle down with someone who has a lifestyle/sexual preferences that you're not 100% comfortable with.
There is NOTHING wrong with you. You have a preference thats all. Im the same way, I dont want to be with a guy that likes guys. Too much competition bro. Lol
Yes, that is wrong. I know couples where one is bisexual and they are still together, happily.
It's much harder for a bisexual person to find a partner due to people thinking that she will somehow be unfaithful due to her being attracted to both genders.
You shouldn't break up with her just because of that. She had the courage to come out to you. She could of kept that a secret. But she didn't. Go and apologise to her.
Let's look at this way? If you had a boyfriend who is bi? Would you break up with him? Don't tell me "it's different for guys" because I don't believe in double standards. She could've kept it a secret but I'd dump her anyhow if I found out she's been cheating on me with another girl behind my back.
I wouldn't even have a boyfriend. I'm a lesbian.
Also, it's really, really hard to find a girlfriend. I mean, I'm going for the 10% of girls that are lesbian or bi.
Ok good for you. How would you feel if your girlfriend cheated on you with a guy? You would feel hurt, would you?
Ok good for you, give me your number and I'll hook you up with my ex.
You guys can live happily ever after if you want my ex, I'm done with her anyways.
Of course I'd feel hurt. But she wouldn't do that. We both want a lifelong relationship and marriage.
Rachelle is taken. she isn't looking for anyone
You'd never know! She may ask one day and if you refuse, she'd be mad. I would not take the risk at all.
And I wouldn't cheat on her. I love her too much. I would like to get married with her some day.
@AzuriteDawn Ok are you her gf?
Sexuality doesn't affect things like that. Bisexual girls are normally more faithful. They have to deal with homophobia, and people like you thinking that they'd cheat with the same gender.
yep. and I'm 100% lesbian. I don't feel attraction to men.
Did I tell you I don't believe in double standards? Girls act like politicians these days and I'm not falling for their petty excuses!
I would be perfectly fine if she was bi. A little annoyed that she didn't tell me earlier, but completely fine.
I'd feel betrayed. I mean Rachelle has a shirt that says 'Step aside, I'm a professional lesbian' I wouldn't break up with her though. I just love her too much.
@AzuriteDawn Maybe she's because she's a lesbian and isn't in denial of herself. I'm tired of closeted girls and that is why I broke up with her. When can people respect my preference this day and age?
@AzuriteDawn I don't see myself being married to a bisexual girl, end of story.
Naa you ain't wrong. If You Don't See Yourself Marrying Her Its Good To Break Up Now And Not Waste Her Time Or Your Own Time. You Good Foo.
you're really going to end a 4 year relationship over the fact that she's bi?
I would understand if you just started dating her. But you're just gonna throw 4 years away likes it was nothing? At that point, why leave over something so minor. A little silly if you ask me.
We all have prefencees. I don't think it's fair that you should be forced to stay in a relationship you don't feel happy with.
So you're not wrong.
There's nothing wrong with not wanting to marry her. You are doing the right thing believe me. Go on with your life and meet other amazing girls.
nah fuck that man.. if u dont wanna be with someone its your choice. who cares what anybody else thinks. ur not in the wrong for making ur own choices and being who you are. or some such bullshit, u know?
Why would that make you a homophobe?
I don't think what you did is wrong. No one can force you to date/marry anyone you don't want to.
You're wrong but ONLY if you knew she was bi from the beginning. If not then, no you're not wrong. We all have our preferences, likes and dislikes, pet peeves, and just plain shit we won't tolerate.
WOW RUDE. how would you feel if your girlfriend broke up with you because you were straight, not bi?
Well first off, it's unlikely going to end because I'm straight not not bi. Second of all, she can find some other bi dude so she can relate and have understanding to.
Sorry, misread your question. Good, if she wants to break up with me because I'm straight and not her sexuality then it's good. She can reveal her true self out of the closet then.
You still haven't said why you don't want to date a bigirl...
I don't want to marry a bi girl because I want a straight girl, not that Im against the LGBTQ community. I'm fine with people in the community doing their own thing.
Straight, I want girls who attracted to men like me, not other women.
yes, if you can't see yourself marrying her, then what's the point in dating her? the poor girl, she wasted four years of her life on you
Hey, it's my preference. Are you bi yourself? Do you want her?
no, I'm not bi. what I'm saying is, why waste your time if you never had a future? it's counterproductive
I don't know and yeah I guess you're right. It was kind of foolish of me to be wasting my time on someone I don't see sharing the rest of my life with. Oh well... I moved on now and hopefully marrying someone who is isn't so "gayish".
gayish? did you really just say that? yeesh if I was your ex I'd be pissed
Well, first off, I'd tell you that double standards don't exist in my book. Second of all, when you throw your little hissy fit, I'd just look the other way and pretend I don't know you.
I don't think I've ever been so thankful that a couple of strangers broke up. Your ex is much better off without you
Ok, it's nice knowing you. Have a nice day.
I don't get why it affects you so much. Being bisexual doesn't mean sleeping around or something. And you and your ex girlfriend both had in common that you like girls.
No, I don't like it at all actually. How would you feel if your boyfriend was bisexual? Would I say "no, don't dump him because you and him both have in common that you like guys"? Stop trying to be so prejudicial!
Well obviously you DO have a problem with bi people because that was the reason you broke it off with her. She was in the right to curse you out. You were with her 4 years and yet the bi thing was still a deal breaker? What the hell?
Yeah I could've end it yesterday or maybe last year or the year before that. Me wanting to marry a bi girl is the equivalency of a shark eating a human and swallowing it.
What
Many sharks don't like eating is humans because they don't like the way we taste; however, from a natural standpoint, I found that the arousal of dating a bisexual is similar to sharks tasting humans.
Wow.
Could've had a threesome.
You can have whatever preferences you want, but bisexual people aren't more likely to cheat, so it doesn't really make sense.
Nah, it's all about preference. I am turned off by threesomes because I don't want to share my girl with someone else.
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