My boyfriend stopped taking me on dates?

[Anonymous]

So in the beginning my boyfriend and I went on nice dates and he paid for me sometimes. He has completely stopped doing anything and we don’t ever go out and if we do, he has to be forced basically. He cooks and I cook but we never leave the house. It’s concering to me that he never wants to do anything nice together or leave his house. If we do go out I have to always pay for myself, he never pays for me. I understand stress with his new job and life stuff. But Is it possible he’s not interested in me anymore? Why would a guy do this?

[Miristheiss]

Well, this doesn't bode well. All you can do is to be honest with him and tell him you need it, you miss it and you want to still do it. Unless you don't believe in equality I'm not sure you have much leg to stand on for you to expect him to pay for every meal and everything you two ever do together.

I read much on the subject and one of the successful behaviors of long term relationships that last is that the guy continues to court the lady. He doesn't court her and romance her until he gets her and then stop and do nothing. That's usually a sign of a relationship that may start well but then die. If he want so to keep you long term he'll need to keep "dating" you instead of doing enough to "hook" you and then stop cold.

[radrio]

Well... sometimes, it could be money related. If he has a lot of bills to pay, he may just be trying to be frugal and pay those bills. This way when he does finally take you out, it'll be with less money stress on his mind.

I have periods of being a cheap boyfriend, no lie. When bills are caught up I get very generous though. My girlfriend understands that it is smarter to pay bills currently but it does make me, the guy, feel bad when I don't take her out as much as I used to.

One thought. It may not be his reason, but it is a thought.

[Nathaniel_P]

Ahh, you've reaches the most wonderful stage in a relationship. It's called the "don't give a fuck" stage. Basically he has no problem just giving a care into throwing a big date together. You're both together. You love eachother. Why bother tossing all this money out the window just to make some big gesture? Smarter people would also call this the complacency stage. He's comfortable right where he is. It'll stay that way if you don't make your feelings on the matter known, sometimes a little harshly because most guys will just blow it off after a day or two.

[Anonymous]

No guts to break up with you after expenses took a big dive + too selfish to let this good thing (you) loose.
Add to this personality types like engineers, autistics and momma boys that will always be homebodies.

A futile try might be to ask HIM out - your treat - and later in week ask him if he enjoyed all that. If he doesn't pipe up & offer to do same for you (at which you set a date ASAP), then tell him THIS is what you'd like from him THIS weekend!

[Pyrofox]

Done with the honeymoon period just feels like settling I guess?

[ChristianFriis]

Have you considered treating him how you expect you? You know, like an equal?

[Wollu]

1. Because he fears to become bankcrupt.
2. He lost interest in you and doesn't know how to deal with it.
3. Both of the above.

[truthbeknown]

Sounds like he is tired of paying for you all the time. Maybe you need to take him out.

[Crankor]

Yah I'm going with he lost interest. That and it's been long enough your seeing the real him as in he prob never did anything when he was single.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s pretty normal. The dating is primarily to woo someone to enter a relationship, after you’ve got the relationship then the interest becomes enjoying the comfort of the relationship.

[MetalPanther]

Being with you is more important to him than going out all the time. Enjoy the time you have together.

[TacosNCuddles]

I would say he's not interested but thats kinda pessimistic. Maybe he feels complacent and way to comfortable. You should confront him.

[WiggleWasser]

That means he's comfortable with you. You should be thankful.

[BeHappy1985]

How about for a change you take him out on a date? Ever thought of that?

[jessture]

Have you ever taken him out on a date?

[Asker]

Yes, I have many times.

[TheOnlyAndy]

Set up a date night, it should help you reconnect

[Canadaman99]

Who pays the bulk of the bills?