Do you think men are the romantics and women are the realists?

Question

It's a stereotype that women are more interested in romance than men and that somehow they are inherently more romantic. I think this is bull shit. I think men are the sappy romantics and women are more pragmatic about their view of relationships. What do you think?

nightdrot · Accepted Answer

Generally, I think it is true that women are the more pragmatic, but it is not quite a pragmatic/romantic dichotomy. It is more complicated.

Women tend to be verbal. They will express their feelings. When I am upset about something, my girlfriend will hold my hand and tell me that everything will be okay.

By contrast, guys are less verbal. We express how we feel by doing something. So I am the guy who will go out and buy her something or take her somewhere - even if maybe when the budget is a little tight.

So, it ends up that she looks - outwardly - like the more pragmatic person. She'll talk with me and we discuss things. I, on the other hand, go for some grand gesture and it looks romantic.

Actually, it is just about the different ways that men and women express affection - and the way we each respond to the other. When my girlfriend holds my hand and reassures me, I give vent to my feelings. When I show up with some gift my girlfriend will say, "Honey, it's wonderful. That was so sweet, but you know I didn't need that."

The funny part is, this gets turned on its head. When my girlfriend talks to me, it is all about, "Honey. It'll be okay. I love you and we'll always face this together." It's all about the feeling. By contrast, I'll come out with a ten step process to solve the problem. It is all about the logical plan.

So, in truth, there is an element of both in each. No doubt, though, that in practice, the guy ends up being the romantic. The secret for the gals - Pay your s/o a compliment and you'll get a million more miles out of him.

BraveHeart97 · Accepted Answer

“Men are romantics pretending to be realists and women are realists pretending to be romantics” is how the quote goes. I think it just means that men are typically logical but when it comes to love, we suddenly become illogical and too caught up in our emotions. As for women, they are typically more involved in the romance genre but when it comes to relationships in real life, they’ll easily get bored or won’t put their full attention into the relationship.

lotv56 · Accepted Answer

The women I have met are more romantic than the guy's that I know. Women always are many steps ahead. A man just invites a girl to go swimming at the lake and the girl in her head already has expectations, for example " Oh my, he may like me more than I think! therefore I need to wear this and that, what if he asks me out, what if he kisses me while we are swimming and then he holds my hand... omg this is too much, that would make my heart burst! Is this an official date?". The guy probably is just thinking about going swimming lol Not saying all girls think this way but the girls my brother has hung out with do and I have myself as well lol The most romantic guy I dated would write me poems every Saturday morning and bought me a promise ring lol but In my head I was still way ahead of him, I was just not romantic with him because he didn't want me to be.

enirikiu · Accepted Answer

I am not going to vote because the option I'm looking for is not there. I don't want to put a generalization on one gender and leave it at that. Every individual is different and will think and act differently. Because of that, we can't say "women all act like ______", or " men all act like ______". It just depends on the person and who they are; that would be determined by their nature, how they were raised, what environment (s) they interacted with, and conditions put on them by outside forces. There are so many different factors that could affect how a person thinks and acts, that we can't just say that one gender is more romantic than the other (or some generalization like that). Sorry if I didn't directly answer the question you asked; this is my opinion and hope it did help even a little, though.

xz498 · Accepted Answer

it depends.. a romantic woman might see most men as pragmatic and vice versa. In some cases too much romance ruins it just like a an overly sweet cake. Women are naturally more agreeable and they have to think fast and consider several problems/outcomes at once so they might me more likely to give up romance in favour of stability for example. But most women dream about this ideal romantic situation and sometimes it's enough for them to just visualise it or see it on tv. Whilst men have a "plan" of the way their life must be and they don't rest until they accomplished it. Chances are they don't compromise as much as women. So that's why women might seem more pragmatic.

silverqueen · Accepted Answer

Men are more romantic because they’re expected to be. Women aren’t told to woo men, they’re told how to react to men’s romantic advances.

Logorithim · Answer

Women are more realistic- they are much more likely to apply an income filter, for exampe, so I'd agree.

nina2992 · Answer

Iam pretty sure it's the other way around. Not to generalise

Chaz269 · Answer

Men are romantic, women are pragmatic. Any argument to the contrary is foolish at best, deceptive at worst.
For starters, look at the THOUSANDS of romantic poems, songs, plays, movies and gestures throughout all of human history. Who created and/or performed 99% of them? MEN, that's who. Women did nothing more than expect. To this day, all women do is EXPECT.
Furthermore, how many men dump their wives or girlfriends for failure to earn and/or contribute to the collective economy? Almost none. Women however, will burn the best man they've ever met because he makes less than her, or nothing at all. Love & romance mean absolutely nothing to women. If you aren't making loot, you may as well drink a gallon of bleach, cuz you ain't shit in every woman's eyes. That's a fact. Now watch all the pinks click thumbs down like it's going out of style, but I guarantee none produce any resources that defy the truth. Women know nothing of romance, let alone love. It's all a fantastic manipulation for them. Nothing more, nothing less.

hellionthesagereborn · Answer

I disagree, that's not to say that men don't think positively about it but I think that's because they are not romantics. Women are taught that love and relationships function a certain way, in very unrealistic ways to be precise, so they are always disappointed but men are taught that relationships are hard and require work and sacrifice but will ultimately be a positive gain. So I think women desire romance significantly more then men but because they have unrealistic expectations they are let down more, while men do not have much in the way of romance (they tend to be happy with the small things and are more focused on happiness in general then particular acts of romance) they also are not as phased when things don't go just so because they are taught that this will happen and are able to anticipate these issues and learn to deal with them better.

Pink1996 · Answer

Both men and women are more romantic but from my experience i'd like to say women are a little more so.

I wrote my boyfriend 2 love letters and i always leave lipstick kiss mark at the end of them and spray them with my perfume and he loves every bit of it. I've mailed him a whole box of his favourite snacks and got him a real leather wallet for his birthday because i noticed his was getting pretty worn. Not to mention that i tell him i love him every day and that he is truly the only man i've ever loved.

My boyfriend has shown me many lovely romantic gestures. he's written me several poems and mailed me fun box of goodies and a love letter. He always says the sweetest words and brightens my day.

NorCal_stud · Answer

Absolutely. Being a straight male and broke in today's society sucks. For all this talk of equality (and I am a proud feminist and egalitarian) women aren't exactly bending over backwards to take me out to dinners or buy me a house and take care of me forever. I absolutely adored my ex, but she was married to a very wealthy man before me, and after 3 years I hadn't been able to earn close to the lifestyle she lived before, and she began to create situations to get over me until she did. Simply because she was scared I'd never make enough- even though with her love and support eventually I would have. And this is not the first time a "sweet girl who doesn't care about money or status" dumped me over money and status.

levantine99 · Answer

women only think are romantic, we are more cynical even me as a song writer and poet. men invented civilization and poems etc to praise us and pedestalised us like silly boys. to be frank i have a friend who is not over his ex who dumped him for 5 years now. i have no female friend that went through something similar.

Katerina_Belle · Answer

I think there is no generalisation. In today’s world it all depends on the individual given the freedom we have to express ourselves.

Historically women weren’t allowed to work, study, and were expected to stay at home and cook, clean etc and that they needed a man in their lives and so media portrayed women that way which influenced women to act that way.

But things are different now. A woman could want nsa and a man a romantic relationship whereas about 40 years ago that frowned upon

Astria · Answer

I've met both men who are really romantic and those who aren't. Sometimes you can miss more subtle romance if you are sort of a traditional romantic. I personally love more creative, subtle gestures and probably the most meaningful are the ones I discover that might've gone unnoticed had I not been paying attention.

Astoriana · Answer

I don’t think anyone is inherently more romantic.

I think that there’s intense societal pressure on men to be romantic because it’s supposed to show that they’re not just after sex. Even when they’re performing “romantic” grand gestures solely to get sex.

Fap_pa_ap_pap_paper · Answer

I think men are pragmatic, and women are romantic. Why do you think men are more often considered heartless and women are considered caring. Granted these are generalisations but still these are my thoughts. Obviously it is a spectrum though and we can fall anywhere on that spectrum.

InDetail · Answer

Erm, I think men actually ARE more romantically interested than women nowadays, mainly because we struggle more with jealousy popping up, its instinct really, your mate is being encroached upon possibly by another male, and you don't trust them because you know their base instincts in a relationship/sexual sense, so less "romance" more romance out of naturally being possessive

SarahsSummer · Answer

I voted B disagree but I dont think it’s gender specific. women want attention. Sometimes the easiest way is to want romance. But alternatively, many guys will try to score/land/get with a woman by showing her romance. Not because he’s romantic but because he thinks that’s the best way to get her attention.

StickStickity13 · Answer

Men are much more romantic than women. Look at the questions "What is the most romantic thing a woman has done for you" and it's all normal things like making a meal or something. Then look at what men do. Women love receiving romance while men like to give it.

ItsJulie · Answer

Both men and women can be romantic. Romanticism is not about gender/sex. Women are not inherently more romantic nor guys. We are all product of our environment, surroundings and circumstances.

_curious_girl_ · Answer

You can't say that one gender is more something and that they all act a certain way. It's like Zodiac Signs, how can the date if your birth mean that everyone near your's is meant to act a certain way like all Leo's are rude and all Gemini are sensitive. Because that isn't true. This question is not worded right and it's sexist as for someone to say a man or woman is less capable of acting a certain way because of gender is absurd!!

aviaviral · Answer

Having being in multi open relationship I would give my honest thought here, I am a guy I'm currently 27 and have been dating for approx 4 honest relationships n 2 some how. In all the cases I was more romantic and surprising in terms of making her or hers smile I wound do things like little that would change her hers mood quickly. So im safe to say men are more romantic but most men would not come out very easily they need a jest to open up. If u r a girl n if u r reading this and if u have come across to this line, I have a suggestion for u..
..
please giv him a friendship bond more then love bond
Like if he likes to play videos game ask him to teach u how to play.. And see the results.. If he like a certain type of music just ask him to put them to your phone n try to talk about them... 💕💕❤️❤️❤️💞💞romance romance all around 😘 take care

Asad1ONE1 · Answer

Both are both. I never understand how weird and nonsensical these false stereotypes can get. They say men are more into "sex" while woman more into "romance" or "love". Well all of those characteristics fall under "romance". Anyone can be one or more of those things.

ero-sennin · Answer

There is a general idea that woman are more emotional than logical, and I call BS. There is no one more logical than a woman who has discovered what she wants.

Malita55 · Answer

I feel like since women are more emotional (this is a fact not just a statement), we are certainly proned to be the more romantic one

layla1234 · Answer

Lots of women look for sex, men looking for more. Specially as they age and lose a little more sex drive. Ctfu they're more lovers and loyal than most women.

Walkerrose · Answer

It's like... I love the romance and all... but I don't know if I do the romance... It's usually him who does the romance :p

Repa33 · Answer

It entirely depends on the individual. Id say more women are romantic when it comes to anniversaries and dates though

Sorathevilone · Answer

TBh men it depends my boyfriend is more romantic than i am but am was more romantic then my ex. Swings and runabouts

sufair · Answer

They are too realistic. Especially indian women. I think it's necessary for keeping the relationship in the reality zone instead of both of them dreaming stupidly.

XanBand · Answer

I'd say men are more pragmatic. I think women desire romance more but tend not to come through with it as often. They'd rather be on the receiving end of romantic gestures

AynonOMouse · Answer

Men are the ones being more romantic. Women are the ones sitting there expecting it but doing very little to show they care about the man.

Auctor · Answer

I think men really do a lot of romantic things. It's just women watch chick flicks that raise standards for men to be unattainable

VIVANT · Answer

I think it really depends on the person - o definitely know my share of pragmatic in love women.

Mexicoman101 · Answer

In my experience, I've always been the most romantic person in relationship dynamics.

OvershareGamer · Answer

I think that married men are more romantic while married women are not but before marriage women tend to want more of that.

LeadSquirrel · Answer

I'm definitely more romantic than some women. But there's more women that are more romantic. I feel It depends on the person themselves. It could go either way.

Volvagia · Answer

idfk but all I think about the topic is that romance is gay af

15hancen · Answer

It's different for everyone. Some girls are very romantic and some men are

baddiebunny · Answer

If men were romantic I’d have guys at my door sending me roses and singing outside my bedroom window

Pegases · Answer

No lol, because women constantly complain about men that only want sex. We are more often the realists. That being said, romance is almost always appreciated by women when it comes to sex.

Yay112 · Answer

I’d love a romantic boyfriend that I could be romantic with, but that isn’t reality for me. I went through domestic violence and I don’t see romance as real anymore, this turned me into a realsit

Klara-Hitler · Answer

I think it depends more on people's personality and age. Younger people tend to be more romantic (both genders). Ageing makes (most) people more pragmatic.  Being pragmatic =/= unable to love

pleasestopthis · Answer

Women I know (including myself) are more pragmatic than guys.

ElaineS18 · Answer

I know that for my relationship it's that way he's always trying for romance

disgustingweebtrash · Answer

I agree, men are more romantic than women and less pragmatic. (Please explain)

GoodGuy131 · Answer

I think that it depends on The person... They're persons that are more romantic than others... The gender does'nt affect how romantic you are..

GreenGold1992 · Answer

Depends on the person. A man can either be romantic or realist just like a woman can be romantic or realist.

CoffeeWC · Answer

Women are generally more in tune with their emotions than their male counterparts. This allows them to be more romantic.

Vinc2017 · Answer

If a girl is in Love they do some sweet things in there free time^^

ALpacino87 · Answer

Focus to be an ALPHA male then she will try to be romantic for you.

Ronin82 · Answer

Women are more romantic because they are the portion of us dominated by emotion amd estrogen.

3timesaday · Answer

Men give women take. All men need to go MGTOW and learn the truth about women’s hypergamis nature.

CertifiedGuy · Answer

Neither. Hollywood says women, but real life says plenty for both genders.

madhatters4 · Answer

i don't think we ca apply a single characteristic in this way to all people of a sex

andreasderjuengere · Answer

Romantic - Realistic. Both is separated from each other.  One is calculation. One is manipulation. (the trouble is: which one?)

TheWombRaider · Answer

NO men are not more ROMANTIC... WOMEN are... Men act ROMANTIC because they know... women want and like that... they themselves are not... but doing it for u..

Nairah · Answer

Well if we were taking the stereotyphical way of thinking then men are realist and women are romantics. But

ZeeMZee · Answer

Men do more things in a relationship and dont expect things back and they dont

ovoxo_ · Answer

I agree, men are more romantic than women and less pragmatic. (Please explain)

Ronlbaam · Answer

Guys have trouble getting women out of our heads. Its a natural thing.

nickdell · Answer

Don't know about these other guys but i am a true romantic.

hansukota · Answer

I don't want to assign roles for gender. by I am a romantic. And proud of it

beebella · Answer

Men are definitely more romantic than women.

Pamina · Answer

I think neither is true.

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