Do you crave more excitement or stability when it comes to a relationship?

Personally I always wanted more excitment but as Im getting older I crave more stability in a way that our connection is based on something clear even if its not extremely exciting but not like its boring either just more toned down.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Stability always prioritizes excitement in my opinion. It's nice to be in a relationship where excitement will rarely/never cease to die but in the long run, finding a significant other who's very faithful, loyal, caring, supportive and loving of you is something pretty much everyone who is wanting to be in a relationship/are in a relationship would be looking for. The attention and affection that people lack come from people who really care about you, love you and want the best of you! If you could have excitement and stability at the same time, that's a major plus for sure! Makes me think when you're young, you'll be craving excitement more because you want to share the joys and curiosities that come in newer relationships while older people prefer to find a stable significant other to spend the rest of their days with! Lacking either one can really take a toll on the relationship without a doubt.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • That's normal not just as you age but as the relationship ages. You get more comfortable and yearn for more comfort than fun. I go through stages where I want excitement for a bit but then default back to comfort. It keeps my relationship exciting lol

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What Guys Said 59

  • Stability for me. Sometimes, I imagine myself going on adventures, sneaking into parks late at night, etc. with a woman, but at the end of the day, I just want a stable relationship with children. I want the “normal” relationship and marriage you see on tv, where the husband and wife set up dinner for the kids, go to work and kiss each other goodbye, etc. Perhaps because my family is that way and I also grew to be like that, maybe.

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  • Girl = excitement
    Women = stability

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  • Stability is what everyone wants when it comes to a relationship , you get to a point in life that u just want to feel secure with your partner and not worry about whether they are going to stick by your side or not but these days , its hard to find considering out society turned selfish and people tend to only really care about themselves

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  • Stability is more important, but the two aren't necessarily mutually exclusive.

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    • i meant more excitable less stabile vs less excitable more stabile

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    • At my age, stability is more important because it's harder to find a good woman than when I was in my 20s. In your scenario, the person with whom I understand why I am attracted to her would be better if compatibility is similar.

    • i completely understand, I've been starting to feel the same

  • well I got to be honest I want to balance it out I want a little bit of both you have to have that balance you can't have too much of either cuz if you have more stability than it tends to get boring if you have too much excitement chances are you're not going to have too much to bility so you need a little of both

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  • As with many things it is a balance. One of the best parts of being in a relationship is celebrating when you or your SO achieves a goal or is recognized for good work, that is exciting and you can both celebrate. In addition when you are feeling a bit blah having an SO there to bring a joyful distraction and liven things up is generally welcomed. Stability comes with maturity and isn't as much as keeping things even keel but has more to do with how people react to life's challenges. We all want a partner who is strong enough to support us when life goes haywire and can step up and carry the entire load for a while if we need to recover.

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    • i meant it more in a way that someone really excites you (not meaning neccesarily sexually) vs when you like someone for some clear rational reasons but excitment is just ok

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    • What if u r more excited about one person and less about other; with more excitable one u do not seem to have much in common or know the real reason why there is an attraction there but she is loyal n stabile person; but with the second u exactly know why. Which one would you choose?

    • If I am more excited about one and have more ‘butterflies’ around her plus she is an adult and mature then I go with her.

  • I think this would be a good question to ask in dates or when you wanna know about people what they like in their love life. Thanks a lot.

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  • I am going to go with stability, excitement is what got me in the position I am now

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  • I want stability in a relationship, because I'm already pursuing a lucrative career and living an unconventional lifestyle--so I need a constant in my life.

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  • Can't we have a balance of both? Do these two have to be mutally exclusive?

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    • yeah i meant in a way full on excitment over some one vs stabile yet not boring, excitable but just not majorly

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What Girls Said 41

  • At the moment I would prefer stability, only because I'm engaged and not just in relationship.

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  • I don't see why these two aspects should be exclusive. It's not a real relationship if it's not somewhat stable and breaks aways under the first signs of stress.
    Sorry to burst your bubble kiddo.
    A real relationship brings both stability and excitement. Sure after 10-15 years the excitement fades somewhat but I don't think you have been there yet.

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    • I meant more excitable less stabile vs less excitable more stabile
      and you should really work on your patronazing tone kiddo 😂

    • Actually, I wasn't trying to be patronizing. I don't understand why you think that. I was just wording my opinion but somehow it had an old person vibe to it so I put sorry to burst your bubble kiddo there to be extra ironic.

    • okay well then what woul you choose between more excitable less stabile vs less excitable more stabile

  • I think stability can be exciting too. There should be balance between doing something exciting together and having some type of routine. I know for myself I wouldn't want to be on one of the extremes, I want it to be balanced.

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  • You can be stable and not be boring, knitting in a corner scheduling sex for once every full moon.
    I don’t care for relationships at all and even I know the difference between stable and snooze. Stable doesn’t mean “toned down”. You both can live your lives, make your money and still be spontaneous.

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  • Excitement is what will keep your relationship stable.

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    • why do you think that?

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    • Not when its repetitive. But a bit of good craziness once in awhile is needed

    • 2d

      exactly

  • mixture of both cause you know you don't want your relationship getting stale, you want go out together and do something fun.

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  • Stability. Excitement is fun, but in the end I want someone I know loves me back and is in this with me.

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  • Since I am young, I usually choose excitement. Sure its bitten me in the ass, and i've had a greater number of shorter relationships than say that couple that stuck it out for 2 years and complained about it before breaking up. I try to grow from each of my relationships, and the idea of staying with someone purely because they are stable feels like I am settling. If I commit then I want to commit because 1) I am in a place where I want to stop looking and 2) i found someone who makes me a better person. it sounds simple, but timing is a bitch which is why it is always best to treat people with kindness, even for a short time, because i think in long term relationships where "people settle and get comfortable" people forget this.

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  • I prefer a stable relationship over an exciting one if its going to be a long term thing. But if Im just casually dating, I prefer excitement.

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  • i need stability... you crave excitement when you don't want something too serious... i like long term relationships that's why i need to feel like things are stable

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