Do people with wrong timing get a second chance?

[Anonymous]

This time last year I was so happy. I met this wonderful guy online. We adored each other. He was such an amazing guy. We both saw a future together. We never made it to anything official. We cut each other off by June. Talked on and off until October. He completely changed up on me. I’ll always have a soft spot in my heart for him although he hurt me.

He’s now dating someone. I’m happy for him because I know he’ll be the best boyfriend/husband/father. They just started dating. I hope she is good to him.

It hurts me that it can’t be me. But I am at a different place in my life than he is. He really hurt me when he cut me off the way he did. Then played games with me after and gave me false hope. I’ll always care for him even if I don’t get the same. I even hope that one day we’ll cross paths again and get to be together.

Updates

+1 y

Okay- read everything that is written and don’t take it out of context. Thank you.

[emmily2396]

No, it wasn't timing in your case, you weren't his plan A. Wronh timing would have if he was already in a relationship when he met you or became exclusive with someone in les than 1 month or 2 after meeting you.
Don't give him something he doesn't deserve. If he would have been into you for real he wouldn't have sent mixed signals. You were just his safety bet, that is why it was on and off. He was busy finding the perfect girl.

[SarahsSummer]

How would you ever cross paths with someone you never met in real life?

[Asker]

We live in the same state and he spends 70% of his time in my city

[Asker]

It’s very likely

[SarahsSummer]

If so close, why did you never meet?

[Asker]

I’m in school and I work a lot. We made plans with each other but either I rescheduled or he would reschedule.

[Asker]

Multiple times. I rescheduled once and then he did it the next time and I couldn’t tell if he was doing it to spite me.

[Asker]

I just know he really liked me so I’m shocked he wrote me off.

[Giggletr0n]

I still cannot understand how someone can become this emotionally attached to another person that they have never met in real life! No judgement, you do you, but these online loves can (regardless of what they say and how many times you have facetimed or whatever) fake pretty much anything about their lives and pull the "evidence" from a quick google search!

[greyghost2001]

Pretty easy, when you have the right mix happening such as depressions, insecurity, false hope, disire to be loved and to love. The fact that someone out there regardless if you met him connect with you on emotional level, slmone who make you feel cared for just by using the right words that’s the perfect cocktail to get attached. Words are very powerful to color any scenario in your mind to make you think that’s the reality. Trust me I had a pleasure to go through this and it took me very long time to get over this person. Manipulation at its finest. Not saying it happens to this person but that’s how I experienced it.

[Giggletr0n]

Fair point 🙂

[Asker]

For me, it happened unexpectedly. I wasn’t looking for someone to be my other half. I wasn’t into him in the beginning. But he put so much energy into me, I couldn’t help but give him a chance and open up to him. But since that has ended, I’m not online dating. I’m completely turned off to it.

I do agree with everything you both said. Completely.

For me, he was also the first person to make me let go of my ex. I now have no contact with my ex and I cut him off for this guy I met online. I never was able to do that. Him and I talked about so much and he put a lot of things into perspective.

[Asker]

But so many people are online using dating apps and sites. It happens all of the time. For some, it works out. But it is playing with Fire because these people can always replace you like it’s nothing!

[djmzes]

Wrong timing

[Asker]

So are you placing the blame on me?

[djmzes]

What do u think?
Wrong timing... or wrong choice...

[Asker]

It’s both.

[djmzes]

Remember life is just a series of choices you have made... there is no wrong timing... just choices and consequences.
Secondly what will happen to you will happen to you.

You have to meet that guy so u will meet, whether you will follow your desire ( choice ) now or u will wait until u mature up ( choice) it is up to you..

Those who said wrong timing are coward and do not acknowledged that their choices were wrong at that time.

[Asker]

I completely agree with you.

[Asker]

I don’t want to become obsessed. I’m just going to let it go and focus on me.

[Asker]

If it comes back to me then it was meant to be but I can’t wait.

[Murakulass]

I recently experienced similar with another guy. I had to cut him off. I was into him but him not into me but he would still make romantic gestures towards me. All I wanted was him but he became practically repulsed by me every time I would lean in for affection. I believe that sub-conciously, he felt he would never be able to meet my expectations of a partner for me. He might be right, but I am understanding and tolerant. There is my ideal, which noone actually exists for and then there is my realism. Perhaps I did not make my expectations clear? Maybe it is simply because he worries that I would leave left him at some point because his esteem of himself was not high enough to make him comfortable with the idea that I'm bisexual... Maybe he's more bisexual than gay than he realises.. I don't know.. I'm just done wasting my time and if and when we reconnect, I'd love to stay his friend...

[WindowLicker]

Life doesn't always give you second chances, which is why it's important to think about your actions before it's too late. In some circumstances it's not even in your control, someone may decide to take that control away from you by walking into the sunset.

[winterfox10]

I think that if he genuinely felt for you, the way you felt for him, then you could have a second chance. The way my girlfriend and I started our relationship was a second chance. She reached out to me after college when she failed to get into grad school. It turned out that she had fallen in love with me back in college, but the pain of being around someone she couldn't be with was too great for her.

I felt like I was having my heart ripped out when I held her in my last days of school, because I thought that I would never see her again. She reached out to me 2 years later to have a relationship.

[lernulo]

Well, what has happened is normal, it's one of the reasons because of I say, take what you have now, because tomorrow may change.
Im glad you care about him, and really desires his best, but I think it's your time to move on.
May be you find your love out there.

[chrisuk]

I understand what you are saying. People change over a period of time and the future may hold different paths. Personally get on with life. Would you wait yen years in the hope he will come to you?

[Asker]

Hell no

[Asker]

I think he should give me another shot

[Asker]

But there’s bad blood now tbh

[chrisuk]

You sound a really lovely girl that deserves more. Whether he gives you another shot or not he's done damage so just move on. Obviously not the right person if he can do that

[Asker]

I have no other choice. It’s not like he’s actively pursuing me.

[chrisuk]

You will find a lot better trust me

[Anonymous]

Women like yourself who want to finish riding out their ability to get male attention and ride out the cock carousel before they “settle down” with the guy who they know is great for them, do not deserve a second chance.
If he is a great guy, he deserves someone who knows and respects that and not someone who simply wants him only after she hits the wall and needs someone to get her through the expired years.

[Asker]

Wtf are you talking about?

[Asker]

Weirdo

[Asker]

Everything you wrote is irrelevant to me. You can’t just create your own narrative

[bamesjond0069]

No. If you deny me and then hook up with other guys dont bother coming back.

[MrWorld]

Nope, ya fucked up. Enjoy being single.

[rachel776]

not usually

[Anonymous]

To me sounds like he was catfishing you.

[Asker]

No we’re both very real lol

[Asker]

But I get why you would think that. I had thoughts but I know he’s real