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I have been friends who were teenage parents or pregnant at some point. And here is what I have to say about it:
1. This is why you do NOT have sex before marriage. The only one I can say I have respect for us one of my old friends who got married at 16 with parental consent. They knew premarital sex was wrong, and did what they had to do. And while her ex husband did okay, he sadly wanted to go elsewhere and not be around her anymore. Another one who was also our friend ended up pregnant be ause Este wanted to experience sex and have a boyfriend. They wore a condom, didn't break, still got pregnant. She was a virgin at the time, and was scared for her life. She aborted at some point without my knowledge and I sensed she was pregnant at that time. She went on to have another child and kept him this time with the same father until that relationship went down hill too.
What they should do is tell their parents. Learn about their options and not get an abortion at all. Abortion won't solve anything. A child didn't ask to be created but he or she is still a life. A life made up of you and this person. If you can't be responsible don't have sex. Becuase like it or not, sex is a marriage and your already one with that person for the rest of your life. It's not a joke. But it is survivable.
They should still go to school part time if most, find a job, and get all the support they can. Real friends SUPPORT YOU. I did when one of my pregnant friends didn't have anybody. And the guy should not be a coward and run away. He should support his family because their a family now. That is why you wait for marriage to have sex. Because it's not a game, a toy or just aboit pleasure. It is more than that. And it's powerful. That power created another human being. And as parents you are responsible. But again, survivable. By yourself is tough. But together they can get a little easier.
People stop playing games with birth control nonsense and abortions. Get married, then have sex. It's not the end of the world if you get married young but choose wisely your mate and future parent of your children. You're not children anymore, you're young adults. And it's about time you start being treated like adults. Teen pregnancy in a sense is not bad. It's motherhood, it's fatherhood. It's been long done for eons. What's bad is your Reckless Behavior, runnng away from tough idsues, can't be loyal or have self control, and then blame other people for your choices. I respect people who do was morally right. I have no respect for cowards. It's only societies supported instead of Shame.
Depends on the relationship for one, the teenagers themselves too. Being young doesn't make them shit parents. Also everyone judging this made up scenario- anyone stopped to ask if they WERE using birth control? It fails sometimes. It's how I've got my boy. Wouldn't trade him for the world but considered abortion when I found out I was pregnant. Just lost my job was unsure on supporting them but my partner was amazing so we kept him. 🤷 Much more context is needed here.
Regardless of what liberal judges tell you people, Abortion is Murder/infanticide and there are even international laws against that, but they never get enforced.
Like I said on that other thread, I don't mind if my 14 years old daughter does get pregnant, as long as she is mature enough and responsible enough to get a job and finish her education and raise the child. I'll even gladly help raise the child, because I love kids anyway. However, a "Mature" person doesn't get pregnant by accident anyway, because they don't have sex if they know they can't afford the consequences of sex.
My sister was a virgin until she graduated college, and she dumped guys who wanted premarital sex, and her husband was her classmate for four years in High School and he had a crush on her the entire time, and he just patiently waited for every other guy in school to make a fool of themselves before he asked her on a date. Now they've been married for 10 years and have a son, and he makes about 110,000 per year income and she makes about 105,000 per year income.
Anyway, if my future daughter is "mature" and responsible, I don't care, but usually "mature" means not having sex ahead of time in the first place, unless she's like a genius and a self made million by 14 or something, which I've heard of a few self-made millionaires by the age of 16, so I guess it's possible...
Even using protection you still can get her pregnant. Condoms are not a 100% guaranteed way of stoping pregnancy. Go together to get her tested and if she is pregnant then own up to it. It seems like either you do not believe her when she says she is pregnant or if you do end up with proof of her being pregnant you want to her to get an abortion because you want to do adult things with not having to deal with any of the long term consequences.
@SALIM28
If it is proven she is pregnant then you shoukd have thought of that before having sexual relations. If she is pregnant ot seems like you want to get rid of the responsibility you helped cause.
@Salim28
You should have thought of that before you engaged in sexual relations. You seem like if she is pregnant you would want her to get an abortion because it's what you want regardless of how it would make her feel physically and or mentally.
@SALIM28
What if later down the road she regrets having an abortion? If you do not want the possibiltiy of getting a female pregnant do not have sexual relations or even cum where she can getvto it because they could still put it inside them.
@SALIM28
lets say she is pregnant and then gets an abortion. Lets say the next time you have sex which results in her getting pregnant are you going want her to get an abortion. Is that hiw it will be until you believe you are ready to raise a child?
@SALIM28
Basically you want to have sex and if she gets pregnant you just want her to have an abortion. If you don't think you are ready to raise a child ever when you want to have sex then do nit have sex.
@SALIM28
Then do not complain if you get her pregnant or any other woman pregbant when you feel you are not ready to raise a child.
Opinion
22Opinion
I was pregnant as a teen and I dont regert it at all. Had a fallout with my family but my baby daddy was supportive and now we are married and had another baby so it all worked out in the end. Its not as bad as some make it seem
You were super duper lucky, most women in your situation would get severely fucked over and they wouldn't have someone they could trust their entire future with.
Good men like your baby daddy are rare, he didn't run away like many would do.
@Syrian_survivor uh he wasn't good to me during my pregnancy. He only started acutally being there once the baby was born
@Apple1996 still better than a run-away dad, which is common, he provides a father figure for your children and that's precious especially in your situation
I think they should freak out a little bit first before making any decisions. If the guy wants to bail, he's going to bail, and the military or peace corps is an excellent place to disappear through for that. If the girl wants to keep the kid, or even if she doesn't. It'd be best if she talked to her parents, they're going to be involved at some point. Whether financial support for a grandchild, or emotional support after an abortion.
First of all the guy should never runaway. You suggest the two of you go to the doctor at a Free Clinic together where she can get a Pregnancy test and theyvalso have counselors to talk to you both. Laws vary by States what your options are. But start with a trip to Doctor's for accurate Pregnancy Test if she says No ask for her reasoning you have a right to see Proof she is Pregnant if she exoects you to Trust her and stand by her. Even Wives show their Husbands he Paper from the Doctor saying she's Pregnant.
I think Abortion is a Personal decision that a person or couple needs to consider carefully. It is often the best decision, since there are already so many children waiting to be adopted and once a female has carried a child to term and given birth it is so much harder to give uo that child the bond developed throughout the pregnancy is so strong it's difficult to let go. Some regret having an abortion but most know it was the Best option at the time.
I wish you the Best with this situation.
You're welcome 👍👍
Any man who runs away from the responsability is a wuss. I don't support abortion but I kind of understand the fear the girl is going through so I would not judge her... adoption is another option. But the ideal way is to have a supportive family and friends who help with that burden and help raising the kid. I know a few girls who faces pregnancy as teens and their families helped with their babies. They were able to study and care for the child during their free time.
That's why at your age you should think twice or thrice about having sex. Everything you do has consecquences and of you're not prepared to face them, you better don't get there.
Nobody can determine what is best for another person. If she feels she wants to have an abortion, that is her choice. If she feels she wants to keep it, that is also her choice. Having a baby can change your life and body forever and only she can know what is best for herself and what she is capable of
Yes but it is her body and mind that is being affected by carrying it or not carrying it. My opinion would be the same if the male were the one to carry it. Having a baby is hard and can change your body in ways that it will never go back to. That’s not always the case of course, but it common. I understand your DNA went into making it as well, but you aren’t growing it and pushing it out. Her choice matters the most because of this. If you were the one carrying it than your choice would be the one that matters.
It depends a lot on what type of society they are living in. For instance, if something like that happens in east Turkey, the well being and even the life of the girl will be threatened. What i’d do if i was pregnant in such society and wanted to have the baby is that i would run away with my boyfriend to a bigger city untill i have my baby
I didn't react well because I didn't know what advice to give. One friend had her baby the other friend asked if she should have an abortion. I told her I didn't know. When I went back to talk to her again she told me she miscarried. I hope that is true but I never went back to ask her again if she was telling me the truth.
One of my daughter's friends got pregnant and she now has the most beautiful smart baby. In her case she has help from her grandparents and parents to take care of the baby when she is at work.
I think it depends on the person. Under 16? If you don't abort, they will both die. Over 16? Depends on the maturity and financial stability. I think it's unfair to judge them for it though, let's not act like none of us were teenagers, of which I still am. Everyone wants to get laid in highschool and some people do, you can't judge them for taking a risk that we all would have.
A lot of complications can come from being 15 or under and going through childbirth. The birth canal simply can't stretch as far as it needs to and there is a very high risk of the lining tearing and the mother bleeding out. There is also the risk of pregnancy complications because while they can have children, their body isn't ready for it yet and may not properly form the child most times. Not to mention, miscarriage rates are very high the younger you go.
It's obviously not a purely true statement as I didn't list sources and didn't have any sites pulled up at the moment. In the majority of cases, they will die or at least one will or there will be side effects. Are you trying to be some hero for people who decide to get pregnant at 15 or younger?
www.who.int/.../adolescent-pregnancy
Depends. If they are both marriageable people its a great thing and they should get married and make it work.
If the guy is a retard and loser that girl is fucked. Which he probably is if he knocked up a girl by accident.
If the girl is a slut nasty girl id tell the guy to cut and run from the start. No possible way to make that work.
If i had a teen daughter like 15 and she got preggo by a 25 year old guy with a good job, goes to church, will treat her right... id congratulate her and tell her to be happy. If it was some ghetto jobless already having a baby mama dude id have to disown her. Thats just fucked and her life is ruined.
they should be given the choice if they want to keep the baby and have support for all parties affected.
Abortion is understandable for the mother who is scared cause pregnancy is an emotional and physically tiring thing and school is on top of that so parenthood would be kinda hard and hard on the child who won't be able to be with their parent as much.
If ethically done^(all parties r ok with the idea)
I think put ur baby up for adoption coz u r in high school u obviously can't take care of him/her thats the best way and no running away is the worst thing leaving ur girl in the time she needs u the most is not a manly decision
Well first of all, it’s no one’s god damn business and if a girl decides to abort, it’s her choice. But the teens should definitely get the parents involved. Getting married is NOT the answer, just be adults about it.
Hello there lol I’m a loner
If they wanna keep it the keep the baby if not that’s fine but don’t freak out just keep calm and relax no need for stress
I’m a loner forever maybe
I dunno think of something else
Think of a hot girl I dunno
Nuuu I’m not hot
Okay fine I’m a little pretty
Sounds like meh 😓 yeah I’m a lost little girl no love etc
Not really and the worlds evil
I don’t have enough Xper what ever there called to pm you
They should do what they should have done in the first place. SIT DOWN AND TALK ABOUT IT. People need to have this kind of talk BEFORE having sex.
Just sit down and talk about your options and come to a conclusion. Weight your options. Involve your parents.
Depends on the situation, some may want a kid and be able to put up with what that choice brings and have strong support systems (family), some may not and can choose to opt for abortion but the guy just running away is well... pathetic.
Then both sides should try harder, it is often hard to reach middle ground cause people tend to get caught up in their own emotions and wishes so not having everything go as you wish it to is a blow. It can be very tricky depending on the situation, for example if the guy wants abortion but the girl does not - she should be ready to proceed on her own cause you just can't force someone to care let alone pay you child support if you were the one making the decision, you chose to sleep with a guy like that and both were equally responsible for peotection, tough shit. If the girl however is the one wanting an abortion and the guy not, well.. it's kind of insensitive but in the case of minors I would say she should have the final say, with grown ups if the father wants the kid and is ready to take sole custody my response would be different.
If you have to ask this question, I’m guessing religion is not gonna stop you from aborting. Adoption is another option. If I kept the baby, I wouldn’t stay with the guy just because he donated a little bit of sperm. Just sayin’.
give birth and put the baby up for adoption or give it to relatives so they can raise it until you two finish high school and become financially stable
No not abortion and the guy should be responsible and stay with her.
I wouldn't be in that situation in the first place but if somehow i was i wouldn't MURDER a baby just because i didn't plan on being pregnant.
In theory sure but in real life no.
Uh, Because i dont go around having sex with people and i dont plan to until im married. So this scenario will never happen to me.
I see it happening A LOT. I don't think teen pregnancy should be glorified though on TV and media the way it is. If you do have sex as a teen, you should be responsible as you can to prevent pregnancies. My boyfriend is a teen himself , he's 17 and I'm 21 and we plan to have sex soon but since I'm on the pill, we're gonna be safe as we can together until we're ready for a child.
Oh my god these other opinions here fucking suck.
Just abort the fucking thing or get a paternity test if she refuses. Do everything you possibly can to not involve yourself in parenthood whatsoever.
Not a time to become parent but it has happened and should support it
It would be an interesting experience, that's for sure
The dude or girl should be adults and take care of what they made preferably together.
The guy should definitely not run away that is a terrible thing to do
It’s probably not true
Don't run away. It's your fault that the girl gets pregnant. So it's your duty to stand with her.
You can take her to a doctor and explain your condition. Then you can have abortion.
You're the one who's asking, remember? So there's my opinion to all your questions. Of your girlfriend gets pregnant then obviously everyone is going to suspect you first. And who told you that using protection is 100% safe? There are many cases where girls got pregnant even after they or their partner used protection.
When I was 15 I had a friend who was pregnant... she went on to have 3 more children.
I my opinion, I think that the final say should be up to the girl. It is HER body after all. If they agree on the same thing then they should go with that.
Umm, then dont have sex during teen years. Simple. People are so ignorant, they put on condoms thinking nothing will happen, but when it breaks they learn their lesson
They should first panic. And then think. Holy fuck my life is ruined. And then they should talk to family and brace for ruining the lives of their parents and siblings. For all you not pregnant but careless teens... Let those thoughts sink in
I'm not even a teenager, I'm almost 22 but Id still be panicking if I found out I was pregnant at this time because I'm barley getting myself a stable a job and my boyfriend is in the same boat.
@PondyPand if you cannot care for a baby on your own, and you know a possible outcome of sex is a pregnancy and then you have sex then yes you are being careless.
While we can debate the merits of using the word “ruin” in a demographic where, being young, without a job and pregnant, you are roughly 10x the norm of being in and remaining in poverty I’d say that’s a pretty bad result.
I wouldn’t sugar coat it and try to highlight the few exceptions that made a go of it. I’d point out the reality of it and not encourage delusion
Abortion is the only acceptable alternative for both parties.
They guy should not run away. You have to be mature and deal with the situation.
They should tell their parents as early as possible. Then figure out logistics, finances as best possible.
I became a teen mom at 18 am one now that I’m 19, I know not a young teen but I’m still a teen ig lol.
💯 my son coming about changed my life for the better forever.
Sex is something a couple has to indulge when they feel they are ready to face all the consequences. And if the girl gets pregnant, its the universe's sign telling the couple that it's time for them to become responsible about life
They get an abortion and always regret it then they give the carcus to planed patent good who sells it to medical butchers.
Oh really? Regret it?
Yes it eats at them. Even years latter when they have their own kids. They lie about the guilt so teens will do it no questions
Oops
If its the guy that put her in that condition, support her all the way whatever her decision. DO NOT run away. Help her.
It's a reality check! The man doesn't have a choice! If the woman wants to keep the child you will pay either way pal.
I think pregnancy as a teenager is not a good thing but anyway a boyfriend must support girlfriend because she is in very difficult situation
Well there is nothing to do but go with it and probably start a revolution to stop teenagers from indulging in sex. Enlighten them about the hardship you both have to go through and warn them. Tell them sex is not just pleasure, it comes with responsibility. No contraception in this world would guarantee you 100% efficiency.
They shouldn't abort because its their fault and an their taking away an inocent life because of their wrong doings, so they should raise the child together as a proper couple does and avoid the same mistake next time.
It's up to them maybe get married , start a family, maybe abortion. Just depends on what they want , their finances etc.
Oh my looks like your pregnant my child * Disappear like a jedi*
I think it's up to the couple to decide together what action to take, and that other people shouldn't really have a say.
They shouldn't be having sex if they aren't ready to take responsibility for their actions.
Umm.. This is an issue now? You should have seen the 90's!
i think they should keep it and ask for help
then give it up for adoption
In accordance with your religion. don't fuck unless married
Oh are you girlfriend pregnancy?
You slept with her unprotected?
take her to the doctor and get tested. and being the murderer of a calm unborn baby. That baby is your child's responsibility to him/her.
You are not a child since you had sexual intercourse.
Be a man and not be the murderer of that unborn child.
Take responsibility for your own mistake.
you should discuss this with your family. with both you and your girlfriend's family.
You're know it so you need talk with her and your families
My 16 years old cousin got married. I am used to it. So very normal to me
But I suggest abortion
Trip to the abortion clinic
ABORTION
I'd support them during her pregnancy.
👋🏄♂️
They shouldn't have had premarital sex. If there wasn't any deceit or fraud involved, both of the "parents" should be executed.
@SALIM28 No, it's for all people who engage in premarital sex. They should all have their heads cut off and have their skin flayed off and turned into leather like a cow.
Isn't premarital sex illegal in Iran? You're not breaking the law are you?
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