Have you ever had a love/hate relationship?

Question

sagevalentineee · Accepted Answer

Love/hate relationships are very toxic. It's such an emotional rollercoaster. Specifically, I would say I have that with my grandad. He has adored me, and taken care of me, and loved me since I was very young. When I was growing up, my Dad was working very hard, and my mum was studying at uni so I spent a significant amount of time wit my grandad who always spoiled me rotten.

The issue is, he's only good to me. He is not a good or nice person. He divorced his wife, my grandma, when they had young children, and put my dad and auntie through hell. He got a mail order bride from the Phillipines and essentially ruined her life. She's 23 years younger, and was hoping for a comfortable life, with a big family and some kids. They were never able to have children. Though they are somewhat happy together, in private she has told me that she wished she had not come. My grandad was an NHS worker, and he faked an injury to get compensation from the company. He faked a spinal injury, he knew exactly what to tell doctors who assessed him and he did win his case, which gave him enough money to retire early with. He also talks nastily about my dad, his son, behind his back. He was unfortunately a terrible father, terrible husband, but a great grandad.

I find him a mediocre and bad person. My parents are mostly neutral but they make sure I don't spend too much time with him as I got older, my boyfriend has encouraged me to speak up about how I feel to my grandad but I don't think I ever will. I love him too much, and he loves me, I could not tell him I think ill of him.

rose004b · Accepted Answer

Yeah, but not with boyfriends. With twin friends, which only made the whole thing more toxic. Growing up together and seeing each other almost every day for 9 years made it extremely difficult to part with them, but it had to be done. I was definitely part of the problem because I also had unhealthy friendships at school, but not as bad (the love-hate whirlwind). And that's the thing, I was the common denominator. Hard thing to come to terms with, but very eye opening.

There's something about love-hate relationships that makes your attachment to a person very strong, for some reason (maybe the emotional rollercoaster with intense highs and lows?). The toxic moments are bitter, but the good times make you feel tightly bonded.

torgor67 · Accepted Answer

Yep people I've talked to in the past but not because of fault of their own rather at the time I was talking to them I was in a super bad place. They however seemed to be cheery and pleasant to talked to which while I liked about them I also secretly was envious of how energetic they seemed which I know isn't their fault and they've probably been through difficulties of their own but I just couldn't stop feeling that way towards them. Eventually I did get over it and we stopped chatting sue to other problems and I like to think as myself as more mature now! At least I hope so... XD

Bluemax · Accepted Answer

Only with comfort foods. I consider love/hate relationships with people to be destructive in about 90% of the cases. It's certainly something I *don't* aspire to.

AmandaYVR · Answer

Not really. But about three guys who I like/drive me absolutely crazy - platonic, all for various reasons.

Desconhecida · Answer

Yes. My former fiance was very abusive at times. I used to wonder if he really loved me since he verbally attacked me from nowhere

Anonymous · Answer

Yeah but platonic. My former best friend had a lot of issues and he could be really temperamental in periods and say shitty things etc. I hated him many times because of that and tried to end the friendship but he wouldn't let me because it was important to him. And i'd get on his nerves because he thought I was too sensitive but in the end he'd always apologize. I loved him too. He came through for me many times and we created some lovely memories together which I still treasure. In the end he ghosted me when he met someone, but he didn't even tell me that was the reason I found that out myself. So much for important friendship. I still both love and hate him lol. He has mental health problems but of course that isn't an excuse to act like a jerk either.

Anonymous · Answer

An ex of mine back when I was a teenager. The relationship for me was just this insane time where I was in this bubble of happiness. I’ve struggled with depression for as long as I can remember, and that was the first time in my life that I can remember being consistently happy. I was this weird awkward teenager, but I had finally gotten my dream guy, and I thought things were finally looking up for me. I felt like the lead character in a teen movie. The break up on the other hand was a nightmare. It was like he became an entirely different person. He treated me horribly after the breakup. At that time I couldn’t tell which version of him was the “real him”. I had loved the boy who used to cut school with me, and let me wear his hoodies, and fall asleep on my shoulder. But I hated the person he was after the breakup. I was so confused.

Anonymous · Answer

With my ex boyfriend who suffered of BPD, yes.
He was good at painting me in black as night or in immaculate white depending on his mood or some events that occurred during the day.
I guess I had a strong response to it.
Hence the love/hate relationship.

Jbreannx_x · Answer

I've never had a boyfriend. But I do sometimes have a love/hate relationship with family yes. More so with food.

flamiE · Answer

Yes, with the same person. It’s more on the hate side.

cute_short_nerd · Answer

Only my closest friends, the ability to fight, and still be friends is glorious.

Redstang88 · Answer

Hmm, sort of. If you called it lust/hate then definitely yeah

answerseeker127 · Answer

I've been madly in love with my girlfriend and we've been the worst of enemies at times because we've broken up over her religion and she's tried to convert me in the past.

yenofed840 · Answer

love happens and then the relationship occurs. it is not your choice. It just happens.

The_Outlaw · Answer

More with my job at present than with a person. Been that way for awhile now. Doesn't help I can't get a vacation.

LonewolfMeme · Answer

Yea 1 with my brother and one with a friend who acts like my brother.

gabrial97 · Answer

I had only one relationship, and she didn't like me back but i did. If thats considered a love/hate theme, Then yeah.

I-C3_ME · Answer

Yes with my mother

Mehzmeh · Answer

Yeah, I have a few of those. Frienemies. Lol

Ericky · Answer

yeah. it didn't turn out well

BeingAnzalKhan · Answer

I had both.. Not with the same person..

Elsa143 · Answer

With my ex.

abutaher · Answer

I'm not good at this

OceanMelon · Answer

Yeah, with my best friend.

QueenOfBaku · Answer

Maybe

mrArcher · Answer

Yeah, with my mom.

EmbraceThePain · Answer

I don’t think so

Hollywoodundead677 · Answer

Never been in one

Iron_Man · Answer

Perhaps so

msc545 · Answer

Yes of course.

Mike199921 · Answer

never

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