What makes you stop putting effort into your relationship?

Question

MamuCandy · Accepted Answer

- If he doesn't put much effort into our relationship
- ignoring my text for hours
- if he confuses me more instead of being straight/direct
- if he gives his attention to other girls more than me.
- if he lies he is busy, but he is online chatting with other girls ( which mean he is ignoring me)
- if he treat me like he doesn't like me, but wants me for himself ( selfish/egoistic bastard)
- if we don't become official after a month, then i dont want to keep putting effort ( it is useless.
- if i am the one who always go at his place and he dosn't come to my place, then i won't put any effort anymore.
... and so on

RainInOsaka · Accepted Answer

I love this question for some reason. It's so important to know what makes you stop effort so that you could fix stuff or leave reasonably.
It would definitely be when the other person stops effort themselves or become distant without valid reason. When they aren't sweet or honest with their promises.

Citizenkirk · Accepted Answer

There was this one relationship that I didn't put much effort into. I suppose it was the one sided nature of the relationship, her references too me being her boyfriend, my reference too her being that annoying girl across the street my landlady insists I spend time with because she's a nice girl and young men like myself need looking after. Landlady lived in the fifties, the girl across the street, La La Land. My roommate insisting I put more effort into the relationship, the ending part of it, anyway, because she really was annoying.

Inexpensivefurniture · Accepted Answer

-If I'm putting in more effort than him
-If I'm trying to calmly talk through our problems and he just wants to argue all the time
-If it becomes clear we have different life goals and therefore the relationship isn't going to last
-If he starts trying to manipulate me, make me feel guilty for things that aren't my fault, or just generally control me. I spot that shit instantly and shut it down

And obviously any abuse or abuse red flags will make me stop trying to make that relationship work and start planning my exit

HawkPerception · Answer

When my partner puts no effort into it.

I'll always try to make them happy and fulfill them sexually, put effort into my appearance and fitness, initiate with them physically often, listen to them attentively whenever they speak, and make romantic gestures when I can.

If I don't see an attempt in effort in the same categories, I stop caring about it myself.

AmandaYVR · Answer

Maybe when the other person stops putting in effort.  And they only comment on your flaws and say criticisms. Then, what's the point?

Paris13 · Answer

Just Now... The Love My Husband Shows Me. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

jennifer_bloom · Answer

If I lose respect for the person as a moral being

WilliamO · Answer

I've only ever given up and stopped putting work into relationships under two circumstance.

1: they made no effort to talk to or spend time with me like I did for them

2: they kept threatening to leave me and used my feelings for them as a weapon to win fights. Eventually I broke and could not handle it and told her I loved her but if she always tries to leave then it's obvious the relationship isn't gonna last

VanillaSalt · Answer

Around the time I got tired of ALWAYS initiating sexy time... also when I did tons of nice things and no thanks were given... ladies gratitude is necessary... just because it’s normal for him to do the trash or hold the door after years of doing someone and never feeling appreciated makes a man lose feeling... And for the love of god INITIATE sex!!!

SnowyOwl · Answer

When someone stops communicating, which shows lack of interest. If you're the one always initiating communication then somethings wrong: they're uninterested, they're emotionally unavailable, they take you for granted, or whatever else... Something's up. You can confront a person about it. Or you can't move on from them. In either case, you'll take action knowing you deserve better

Dougzy · Answer

The moment the negatives start. it harsh and true, a friend of mine once made a comment to me he said" I have never seen a man like you! you can take a woman to feel the highest and best that she has ever felt in her life, one can see the changes it is incredible to observe! Then you will just stop and they crash. "why is that. I simply said one thing when they start moaning I take as they enjoyed where they were and stop being me hey in no time at all the relationships falls to pieces because I allow them to run things.
Why I don`t save the relationship because moan just devalues it for me and the interest disappears on my part

Nawlins34 · Answer

It's a combination of when I can look in the mirror and say I've done everything I've can to make this work and lack of effort from them.

I don't drag it out either, the moment I stop putting in effort, I'm ending the relationship. We've already discussed it and I'm done talking.

G3tAClue · Answer

If I don’t feel like putting effort into my romantic relationships then I consider it dead and will break up with them. With friends however, what causes me to step away is when my friend feels that she is better than me or judging me.

Juxtapose · Answer

When I'm the only one putting any significant amount of investment in.

Anonymous · Answer

Being in a a relationship.

The whole point of the effort is to get the relationship, and then it’s time to chill out and enjoy it. Something seems wrong if I can’t stop putting in effort — I should be able to stop, if I can’t then it’s not the real deal.

Splandish · Answer

When they stop putting in effort or I feel like I’m being lied to and taken for granted

broken_heart_at_48 · Answer

When taken for granted or not appreciated. When I'm the only one trying

Zarapeachy · Answer

When I am feeling alone in the relationship. And when I reach the point where I don’t know how I feel

Slime95 · Answer

Me, im stubborn as hell, so i stay and try to make it work if i see the slightest effort from the other side.. But when im certain that i can't do nothing about it.. I leave.

Anonymous · Answer

A mixture of being comfortable in the relationship and being tired from work and adult responsibilities, so the idea of then putting forth even more effort at the expense of free time to decompress is... undesirable.

mike5150 · Answer

I think it kind of goes both ways. If you see the other person starting to slow down the effort they put in it might make you do the same.

ohshee · Answer

When you stop being happy or being able to make your partner happy because of what ever she's going through and in time you take it personal or something that it might not be or is and that's when things start to change

hahahmm · Answer

I’m not going to do more than half the work. Sometimes women think the man needs to do 98%. Ha ha ha!

iseekpinetrees · Answer

When you see your efforts aren't getting you anything

sheikalana · Answer

Honestly, when the sex is bad or when I feel my partner is not investing in me. If I feel he's not giving me enough attention as he used to.

ObscuredBeyond · Answer

4 months of ignoring me is pretty potent motive killer.

JKingOff · Answer

When they stop doing there part, won't listen, and won't change. At that point I just say fuvk it and find someone else.

garrysingh638 · Answer

3rd person. When 3rd person creates problem between you and your partner. and partner does not listen you.

ch2raf · Answer

A very good question that I wish I considered stop putting efforts once lol. But if I have to get you a direct answer  I'll say pressure

triff · Answer

Let me have some information and I shall do my best to help

WhiteGlaze · Answer

Lack of care from the other person. The level of try is unmatched. They give up and fuck someone else. The typical. Typicality in general is enough to turn me off and stop wanting to move forward and progress in a relationship.

snappysierra · Answer

they break your trust, or you see the effort being less or both at the same time

pleasestopthis · Answer

When my sincerity isn't felt no matter what, whatever I say and do is criticized.

TrustOfWorthington · Answer

When it seems like whatever i say ir do, i am always at fault, I am not understood and I only give and receive nothing.

keddesh · Answer

I'm a big proponent of reciprocity so if I feel like I'm not getting an equal amount of effort out that I'm putting in, I check out.

havingfun101 · Answer

I hear that when she gets a ring, she pulls the pin on the fat grenade and the sex dries up.

StepLadder69420 · Answer

If they stop putting effort first or they do something sp fucked up that I can't morally stay with them

Lycirian · Answer

When I say thw total stupidity of what comes out from the women.

whatifme · Answer

When there is no effort coming from the other person.

venomhbk1313 · Answer

When you start growing apart less sex, less communication among other things

bklynbadboy1 · Answer

When I put in effort and see I'm getting nothing in return

localgeek · Answer

Lack if appreciation. Constant criticism. Emotional abuse

RHK36 · Answer

When they don't put in the same as I do or I start to get over the relationship. At that point either a break up is coming or a healthy argument.

Younghungguy17 · Answer

When I loose interest in my partner or we are going separate ways

honestGUY45 · Answer

Realizing they're not worth the effort.

abhirox1 · Answer

First of all let me get into relationship... then I will answer your question... LMAO

9Livezzz · Answer

The lust that was once there has disappeared causing at least one of you to wonder if there's someone better out there for them.

ronaldo75 · Answer

When women start shit and start drama to then play victim later on. Having to be right all the time.

DaMack999 · Answer

When it becomes dull and boring and seen everything.

StickStickity13 · Answer

when she doesn't reciprocate enough

Agape93 · Answer

When I no longer see a point

Xoxocutekitty · Answer

when I start thinking that maybe i can do better.

Anonymous · Answer

Cheating, massiv lost of attraction, too much change, psychological terror

Bang5luts · Answer

When the effort seems a little one sided.

I-C3_ME · Answer

When it's starts feeling one sided

Meangurl · Answer

When the other person is not go wing a 100%

CubanLove · Answer

No sex, annoying argumentative behavior.

AlwaysBelieving · Answer

Different things for different relationships.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

When it isn't a relationship.

imcuriousgirl · Answer

When your efforts are in vein

AaronKrieger · Answer

When I'm not being challenged

msc545 · Answer

not being appreciated

BeyondCuriosity · Answer

When they stop giving me a reason to.

What makes you stop putting effort into your relationship?

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What makes you stop putting effort into your relationship?

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