What are your thoughts on sharing your location with your significant other?

[Hannah_Ann_Linge]

My boyfriend is wanting me to share my location with him. I’m not hiding anything, but I’m not sure about that. What are y’all’s thoughts?

[caring__1]

There are so many reasons a person would want this. Some show caring and some show insecurities. My concern is he asked to track you without explaining his reasoning first. Never set someone up to make a decision without first making sure all the facts are known.

Let's say your neighbor comes up to you and asks whether you're busy this weekend. If you say you're busy, he may respond with, "I was given tickets to a concert for a band you like, but I don't care for, but, that's all right, I'll find someone else to give them to." If you say you're free, he may say "I'm moving this weekend. Thanks for being willing to help me." No one likes to be forced to make a decision before the facts are on the table. Let's say your boyfriend is offered a job, and payment is $5000 a week. Would he accept that job? What if he later learned the payment is to the employer, not from the employer?

Sometimes, people want to be able to track their dog or cell phone if it is lost. Having that ability can allow you to find the lost pet or phone before injury or damage can be done. Let's say you call him and tell him you were just in an auto accident and hit your head. You can't remember where you are, but you know you need help. A tracker would be helpful in that situation.

Sometimes, people feel so insecure, they can't believe others could care enough to be honest with them. They need to constantly crosscheck whatever a person says to reassure themselves. Being in a relationship with an insecure person is very draining. No matter what you say or do, nothing is ever believed. Never make decisions without first having all the pertinent facts.

[Almost10inch4funlol]

If it’s voluntary I’m coo with that but if it’s mandatory then that’s too far, I can only be in a relationship with a woman I completely trust and that completely trust me to enjoy our selves respectfully when not accompanying each other. I love to see the other men in the club see my beautiful woman and want her, I’m even cool with her dancing with guys and I’ll be dancing with girls, dancing isn’t personal but conversation is as long as I trust my woman I can enjoy my solitude while she goes on a girls night and not be consumed by the addictive, toxic , and anxiety of being wondering if my girl is getting dicked down by the imaginary man in my head that’s aesthetically perfect and richer than I 😱😂😂😂😂😂 I’d rather be with someone that I can trust. My point is this:

A relationship without trust is like a car with no wheels, you can sit in it but it’s going nowhere.

Pay attention to when you are being sucked into the toxic relationship with someone you constantly have to feel like you have to provide proof of every word they say and it can be addictive and exciting at the time because they keep you on your toes but it’s only going to end in either mental, physical, disaster.

[Screenwriter]

Hmmm... When he calls you, don't you tell him you're here or there? Why does he need a location finder on you all the time.
Something's wrong about this. I don't share my location with anyone: not my adult son or anyone else. I don't allow location finders when they're requested by companies: google, yahoo and even places where I shop online. This is an information gathering method to sell you something in the future, in THAT case.
In the case of your boyfriend? He doesn't trust you. This is disturbing. You need to have a serious talk with him about this if you're in a serious relationship with him.
If this is some new guy, have the talk also and tell him it's none of his business where you are. He needs to trust you.
If nothing comes of this in EITHER case, you need to move on. He's got self-esteem issues, trust issues and worst of all CONTROL issues that YOU CANNOT SOLVE. Your giving up YOUR privacy to placate him is the first step on the slippery slope toward giving up your personal freedom.
RED FLAG, RED FLAG!!! RUUUNnnnnnnn!!!

[1Anon]

I don’t like it but my dad and best friend can see my location (for safety reasons and I can see theirs). However, my husband has tracked my location for years (iPhone’s Find My Friends) and only a few months ago he allowed me to track his location. I’m not bothered about seeing his location because I don’t care about those things. However, my husband is also my dom/master and we moved to being 24/7 so he generally does have control over me as I’m obedient (for the most part lol). But aside from that dynamic, it’s weird to share locations unless it’s for safety reasons and even then, it depends on the type of relationship.

[1Anon]

Thank you for the MHO

[razelove]

Ugh, my wife offered that, it seems so damned creepy, controlling, and very easy to manipulate from the person being tracked. Pick up a prepay while you're getting groceries, call in sick to work, leave the tracked phone in the car, rock and roll.

It just seems so pointless and odd. The only time digital as opposed to HUMINT surveillance has a chance of working is when your target doesn't know about it which is, you know, highly illegal.

[lumos]

I don't see why that would be necessary in a relationship where there's trust. I only understand sharing your location if a) you're supposed to meet up somewhere or b) you're walking home alone at night and he wants to make sure you're safe. Sharing your location at all times just seems excessive and unnecessary.

[lumos]

@ everyone saying "if you have nothing to hide, what's the problem?":

The problem is the tone this sets for the relationship. If you trust your partner 100%, do you really need to know their exact location at all times? No. You don't. That's a fact. Any other answer besides "no" points towards you not trusting your partner and potentially being in a toxic relationship. And if you don't trust your partner, it's not about this being some innocent little thing where you want to make sure they're safe. It's about you feeling a lack of control and thinking that this is how you regain some of it. But the truth is that if your partner wants to cheat, they're gonna cheat. Tracking or no tracking. Therefore, like I said, it's just excessive and unnecessary. Y'all need to sort out your trust issues before getting into relationships and dumping all your baggage on your partner.

[mistixs]

Depends on intention.
I would actually love to share my location with a loved one so that they would know if I'm being dragged by a kidnapper into a dark alley or something.
But if the reason they made that suggestion was so that they could be controlling, or to make sure I wasn't cheating, I would feel hurt by the implications.
It's definitely something I would prefer to bring up, instead of my partner bringing it up.

[OlderAndWiser]

This is a potential warning sign of a controlling personality.

[abc3643]

Here's what you say:

"I will share my location with you only when it's absolutely necessary and I want you to keep track of me for safety reasons, like I am traveling in bad weather.

Otherwise, I am turning the Location setting on my phone to OFF because, when Location is ON, it drains my battery much faster. That's a safety hazard if I am in trouble like stuck in a dead car in bad weather and have no phone power to call for help."


^^^^^^^^^^ Everything I wrote above is true which is why my Location setting is off, but I turn it on when I am travelling across country (and charging in my car) so my wife knows where I am.

[Mac-One]

When we were young and dating, and during our working years, we did not have phones and tracking capability.

We were young when we got married. When going different places (working or other) we always told (called or other) the other one before leaving and upon arriving; mainly out of caring and concern. When working at the same location we traveled together whenever possible.

Currently we spend over 99% of our time together and other than an occasional quick trip to a local store (let the other one know where and when) we go everywhere together. About 2 years ago we got our first mobil phone and take it when away from home for security reasons only; not for tracking or any other reason.

We never had secrets as to where we were or where and when we were going. Would have liked to had the capability to track our children when they young but the technology did not exist then; mobil phones did not even exist.

[Anonymous]

Well this is just me but the guy I’m seeing, I just asked him to put his snap map on and he was super chill about it and did it. I didn’t ask to be controlling but just to show him something cool. He left it on for me to see wherever he is and I’ve left mine on for him too. We both trust each other a lot so we don’t have to hide anything. He’ll ask where I am and I’ll him along with sending a cute photo of me wherever I am and he’ll do the same. All innocent, non controlling behaviour. It’s healthy and it’s nice to be able to be so open with a person and have it not be toxic. We LOVE sharing everything with each other and won’t try make the other feel worried by not doing something when they need reassurance (we get our moments as well) but yeah when the person is controlling and obsessive then that’s bad...

[Aethereal]

I don't think there is anything wrong with that. It's only a problem if your partner isn't planning to reciprocate by sharing his location with you too.

Note that I personally don't think it's healthy for couples to hide things from each other. I also support couples knowing each other's passwords and having access to each other's phones and social media.

But for this sort of thing to work well, you both need to have discussed your individual stances on boundaries, clingyness, etc in advance of becoming a couple. I don't believe these things make a relationship toxic. It only becomes toxic when one person tries to impose a system on their partner that they don't want. This could indeed be wanting to know each other's location, but it could also be not wanting to know each other's location.

What makes a relationship healthy is that both partners are happy with the arrangement they have, not what outsiders think is healthy.

[JustTheTrue]

It is a sign of a controlling personality, but it isn’t just that. Maybe he is insecure and feels like you can find someone else and he is scare of that. He probably think that there are better guys out there and tend to compare himself to others and that’s one reason why insecurities come into play. Trust me a lot of guys tend to have that kind of insecurities even me one of the most confident person on the planet lol..
Main point is that he is either a controlling person or an insecure one.

[PhantomMk]

If your going somewhere sure your unfamiliar with sure why not that way in case you get lost he can find your location without the attacker knowing but if you know where your going hell no first of all your are his girlfriend not his daughter (I’d have some problems if he did this to her that’s a discussion for a later date) he doesn't need to know your location 24/7 unless he is that insecure if he is then he needs to hit the road, secondly if you want to know my location I can play the same game give me yours and don’t turn it off or we are done so let him know it works both ways and lastly ask him did he do that to his ex and that will probably shut him up.

[Nawlins34]

My fiancee, I tell her my locations for safety purposes. If something goes wrong, she knows where to look first and yada, yada.

That being said, prior to this relationship, I knew the difference between giving my location for safety purposes and feeding info to an insecure person.

If I feel like I'm doing the latter, I end the relationship with that person. Because if they truly are insecure, them knowing my location will not resolve any issues, it'll create more. We have to find a balance, which is easy to find with a logical person.

Just my opinion on the matter, I hope I helped. Good luck and be safe.

[VanillaSalt]

It’s nota bad thing. Think of it this way. When you have kids will you want to track them and make sure their safe and following the rules? If their ever murdered or go missing you can find them. If they lie and go to the party or play hooky you know. I think acceptable restrictions are good for people because it gives us a line to stay straight on.


I also understand trust is important but... I’ve had 3 cheaters out of 3... if a lack of trust can be resolved with such a simple method it seems worth it. Besides I’ve called my ex many times “are you still at the store” no well damn. Go back you forgot the milk or whatever.

[lumos]

Except that tracking your kids and tracking your partner are wildly different. Also the fact that you lack trust is a *you* problem that you should solve through working or yourself or going to therapy. Not constantly tracking a partner who likely hasn't done anything wrong to warrant you being suspicious of them. If anything, tracking their every move will make your distrust even worse, since you're feeding into it rather than going to the root of the problem.

[NathanDavis]

You can try it for a couple of days and then see what happens, once he knows your location, and he starts to question you about every single place you go and what have you been doing, and with whom... this is a very terrible sign. But if does not ask many questions at all, then maybe he was just a bit paranoid and wanted to ease his mind.

[Espresso-Grande]

It's a strange request. Before deciding, I'd find out his motive. What's his motive for needing to know precisely where you are at any given moment

There's no need to know where your partner is every minute of every day. You're not a prisoner that's being monitored on tag.

[lilyanony1]

I shared my location with my ex, but I didn't realise his location would be shared with me too. He got annoyed and closed it down simply because it would have shown me he wasn't where he claimed he was.
I had no suspicion over where he may have been as I trusted him, but he showed me at nearly every step in our relationship to tread with caution.
I really don't get how someone could be so corrupt.

[yofuknutz]

Drugs that's how

[lilyanony1]

Taking it or selling it

[yofuknutz]

Both I suppose primarily taking it

[lilyanony1]

Sad really when you think about it.

[sheikalana]

Even if you have nothing to hide there's something called privacy that everyone is entitled to. Why does he want you to share your location? Is it because he doesn't trust you?

[Hannah_Ann_Linge]

He hasn’t told me the reason. He just sent a request on Snapchat but I never brought it up

[sheikalana]

Ignore it.

[DJB72]

I tell my wife of 17 years where I'm going to be but we don't have access to each other's GPS location on Google if that's what you mean.

I shared my location with her twice in the last few years. Both times when I had to go a significant distance on a motorcycle so she wouldn't worry. That's the only reason.

[bowenw]

It sounds like he's controlling and a no-win situation. If you agree he'll be happy. If you don't, he'll be upset. If you're not comfortable with the idea you could tell him you appreciate his thoughtfulness, but you're a big girl and don't need it, but thanks anyway. If you're okay with it, be sure it works both ways.

[Toast792]

I would only consider sharing my location if I was going on a long trip/driving to a different state, or if I were using uber and the driver made me feel unsafe. Any other situation feels a bit controlling. But I dont know you or your relationship, so maybe your boyfriend is just protective.

[Anonymous]

I would only do that for someone who is in trouble or so.
I even often have location and/or data signal switched off when out and about because I do not want to be tracked by Google and to safe battery. No way a boyfriend of mine need that information. He can just ask if he wants to know where I am.