Texting is a horrible way to communicate. It's convenient for simple information like my wife asking me if I can pick up some milk on the way home, or her telling me that she just got off work. A person can send a photo with an explanation.
But I DO NOT understand the idea of carrying on conversations via text. If you have time for that, you have time to make a call, unless you're a kid living at home and you're silently texting your friend in the middle of the night when you're supposed to be asleep.
If you are texting because you are multitasking with other things at the same time, then you aren't interested in devoting full attention to the person. It's disrespectful.
You would think that two people who were interested in each other would WANT to talk to each other. There is nothing like the sound of a person's unique voice.
Kids who won't answer the phone but will respond to a text are brats.
People who grew up texting become almost autistic. They are afraid to actually talk to others and they don't even know how. They haven't learned the ability to read body language or tones of voice. That's why we see question on GAG like "He said hi to me and smiled. What does that mean?"
Regarding misunderstandings, it's obvious. You have to be very clear when communicating in print. You can't hear voice inflections. You can't tell if a person's voice is cheerful, tender, or if they joking or being sarcastic.
Well, texting indeed is one of good ways of communicating with the other. I mean especially if meeting in person is not possible on regular basis. As long as the person has the ability to use the right words in the right context then misunderstandings shouldn't happen. If the person knows how to explain things by texting and also assure the other properly then chances of misunderstanding arising out of texting should be very less.
It also depends on the person, some people prefer texting more as compared to calling or meeting in person and some people prefer meeting in person or calling as compared to texting.
What I said above is for people who prefer texting as the main mode of communication. In that case they have to be very careful with using the right words, use proper language and also be detailed in explaining things. I am also a person who prefers texting and I never mind people texting me also.
However, that being said the only drawback I see in texting is it requires more effort to think about the choice of words to use, to form the sentence, giving detailed texts requires even more thinking and effort and then type it out as compared to other modes of communication.
If texting is used properly then it can never cause any misunderstandings. At least I believe so.
I'm going to play the devil's advocate here and side with people that prefer texting or messaging.
For some people they're able to relay their thoughts and feelings easier through words rather than verbally. I know because I'm one of those people!
I'm terrible at expressing feelings or talking to someone over the phone: I prefer typing out my thoughts to make sure it sounds right, I don't stutter or fumble, or forget to tell them something.
Most of you that are introverts, socially awkward, or just like to think before you speak probably understand where I'm coming from-
Yes, I know texts don't convey emotions of moods. Which is one of the main downfalls with texting, and why I tell people don't ask out, or break up with someone over text or messenger (not to mention it's rude and lazy).
Nonetheless, I get what you're saying: texting can definitely cause miscommunication in relationships. That's why people need to learn how to communicate verbally as well!
For example, if you have a problem with your partner, send them a message saying, "Can we talk on the phone or in person later?" That gives you time to think about what you want to say, cool off if you're upset... etc.
Then talk. Listen. Repeat until you both express your feelings and thoughts.
Yeah it's that simple. We just complicate things.
I guess people get used to it now a days, and maybe it seems like an easier option bringing up some conflicts/tell something difficult, when you are not face to face. I also think it is a mistake, and personally I do not feel that connected via text and even if I get a nice message I would just wish it was something they would tell me in person instead xD.
I always try to keep things on text casual and for planning, and do the serious and deeper conversations face to face, or call if that is not an option. But many I have dated have been acting different and I had issues because of that.
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Most times people are just lazy. Communication in general has gotten lazy.
It might vary from person to person because I’ve met people who had amazing text message ability and people with decent text ability and also people with horrible texting skills. I don’t mind maintaining a friendship or romantic connection through text id the person has a noticeable voice in their dialogues or at least is interested in what I say when they do not have their own ideas to chip in.
Funny you ask as much in text... lol
It used to be that people would meet face to face to discuss everything. They would talk, and based off of the other person expressions, and posture, they would know how to react, and when to back off.
Today, people communicate via text, and because a person cannot see them, they tend to get a bit brave, and say things that they would never say to a persons face. They feel safe behind their text, and because of the words they use, they cause great confusion. You no longer can look at a person to understand what they mean; if that person has a very bad vocabulary, they can be severely misconstrued. Texting over all should be done in such a way, that there is no mistaking the meaning behind the text. What you text to your close friends, may have a different meaning to a close acquaintance. You have to be very careful of what you say; and how you say things to every person, since their background can give them a different perspective of what you mean.
People will always text, in spite of misunderstandings; they see text as a fast way to get a message sent; with very little actual interaction with a person. When you talk on a phone, you have to follow social cues; text does not follow those social cues.
Most people don’t realise that hearing another person’s voice can be beneficial to our well-being. With a text it’s basically nothing but data transfer - there is no transfer of emotion by way of tone, nuances, non-verbal cues etc. A text strips down communication to just 7% of our expression so no surprises that it leads to so much confusion and misunderstandings. 55% of expression comes from body language and 38% just from the sound of our voices alone. We are humans, not robots, and we crave the feeling of being heard and understood - which text doesn’t give us. When we hear a familiar voice in conversation our brains produce oxytocin which makes us feel truly connected to another person, and allows the build up of trust and security - and wellbeing. We don’t get this at all from text/email - you can’t build up a trusting relationship with a person (working or otherwise) from online comms - we are fooling ourselves if we think we can - oxytocin is absolutely key in true connections
I'm really bad at deciphering what people mean through text. I over analyze everything. My brain is just wired that way. Most of the time when I assume, I'm usually wrong. So now I don't assume anything. I honestly get tired of trying to figure out what someone means or tired of asking for clarification. I just figure if they really need me to understand then they will explain more otherwise I ignore it lol.
I'd rather be face to face with people. The possibility to actually have in depth conversations!
I don't. I don't text her, I CALL her, to hear her voice, and laugh/giggle, when I suggest something for later, after work.
Texting is for simple, BS crap, like "by the way, picked up your dry cleaning clothes" or "yeah, got the right milk, and the other things. . ." on the way home.
Calling, talking, SPECIAL things: "What kind of wine do you want, with dinner, oh, and what are we having?" at the liquor store. . .
I know, most are LOL! But If I am thinking a Malbec, and she is thinking Fettuccine, with an Alfredo sauce, THAT won't work!! by the way, Chateau Ste Michelle, chardonnay, is WOW, with that!!
It's funny, I was literally thinking about the downfall of communication just the other day. We used to consider a phone call pretty impersonal and would rather talk to people about important things face-to-face. Now, it's weird getting a phone call like omg who died haha otherwise why are you calling me. It's sad but true. People claim it's more convenient, but how convenient really is it if it's leading to drama? Until people become way more intentional in their communication with one another, this is just the way it will be, or who knows maybe we'll get to the point where even texting feels like too much of an effort for most people.
I use texting as the main form of communication with everyone I know, because talking on the phone makes me insanely uncomfortable. I need time to nit-picking everything I'm saying and perfect each sentence, or I'll get anxiety. I don't have any time to adjust when talking on the phone.
Back in the day, we used to write letters to each other. My grandmother said it wasn't uncommon to receive 20 letters in one week. She would dedicate several hours a day reading and writing letters. Most of those letters were at least 4 pages long. Then the phone came along and no one wanted to write letters anymore. The trouble with phone calls is oftentimes one person would do all the talking. Then emails came along and no one wanted to do phone calls anymore. Correspondents were just one or two sentences. Nothing like mail letters. Then texting came a long and no one wants to do emails anymore. Conversations consist of one or two words.
I wonder what's next?
It's so much easier to make a phone call then to text. I would rather spend hours on the phone talking then texting. I use texting for short communication. People like to hide behind their phones because it's easier then to face a person and communicate. I also think that majority of people like to find problems and have them in their lives. That's why when misunderstanding happen through texting they can get upset angry or whatever and like to have that conflict in their lives. I dont. I want to be clear and consise in my communication. If I dont understand something or want to be clear about what someone says I ask clarifying questions just to make sure I understand what the other person is saying.
Considering most either fall under one of the below listed categories and others not listed even while comunicating in person-
wishy washy, flakey at their best, distracted, mind gamer, or really prefer not to be observant avoiding accountability.
Its no surprise text is still a main form of communication in turbulant relationships.
Facing off with people is difficult for somebody who's not used to it. The type of disastrous grammars I can read in leaked messages all over the internet would also sound extremely sillier if spoken out.
Personal interaction requires a modicum of personality, as well. Stuff that's severely lacking in today's youngsters.
I can't agree more. No one is teaching them, for many this is the normal way to communicate, they didn't learn to express their feelings more "lol" "omg" "wyd" and hashtags, many think it's silly to accuse phones and bad parenting but now knows nor undestand how serious it is. I know people who does that and they don't get it while they are going in their 6th relatinship after they got dumped as they say "for no reason"
Because some people love the emotional roller-coaster when their words are taken out of context. A text message doesn't imply the same context as talking to the person. I text only to setup meetings or answer simple questions. I've found that its a waste of time typing and waiting when i can use my voice and talk.
People are afraid of the communication in real time or they feel a phone call would interrupt what they are doing like watching TV or watching a movie. It gives people time to think of a response instead of being put on the spot. In my case it is because I talk on the phone for 8 hours a day and the last thing I want to do is jump on the phone and talk some more after I clock out.
Because some y'all don't know when to shut up.
You be like okay gotta go.
Them: ok, oh by the way blah, blah, blah.
Me: seriously i need to leave.
Them: okay, talk to you, oh yeah seriously did you see blah, blah blah.
Me: heffa i said i gots to go. I mean damn😡 *click*
Text if ya can't shut up, i can ignore until I'm ready to respond and we can pick up later
Very, very good question.
I do mostly so neighbours/those around cannot snoop in on the conversation - to keep it private - but then they do snoop in, as does someone on the other end, so it is no more private than voice.
Most relationships are broken up by some greedy a-hole ruining them on purpose - if you can sit and talk in a car, all sim cards in the boot (also the car SiMs, mine has one that can't be removed) - you could get to a 'safe' conversation between the two people.
Why do they do it. Mostly the ugly ones simply wanting those hotter to just fuck and never be connected/happy - it would invalidate their Talibanism/Middle Easternism/Indianism
I agree with you that is why I don't use text messaging much
cause all I get is one or two words and this girl lives clear
on the West Coast and I'm on the East Coast so it's far
I don't know how we would ever get together someone
would have to relocate and it would be an issue for me
I'm use to my Pennsylvania grassroots plus the cost of
living in California is high
Texting has causes me unnecessary problems... because it's like when am typing something I can't read what they just said... and I might accuse them for missing out an important detail or vice verse... but the detail just came in when I was typing or video versa😂😂
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