Is it fair to expect my ex to keep paying rent until I find a new roommate?

Question

So my boyfriend and I broke up a week ago and I told him to move his stuff into the spare room and stay there until he finds a new place (apartment is in my name), and I came back home from work and he's moved out, texted me he's gone back to his parents house until he finds his own place because he can't stand to see me, and this has screwed me over big time because I Can't afford the rent on my own and I told him he'd have to help me with rent until I get a new roommate and he says that's my problem not his, yeah he broke up with me over something that shouldn't have been a break up but I still feel like a decent person would help pay especially as he pays no rent at his parents so he could afford it, am I being unreasonable?

CuriousJC · Accepted Answer

Well then I can agree with him. You messed up big-time, because you're not supposed to be giving anybody a bJ unless it's your boyfriend only. I am in a relationship with someone you belong to that person and he belongs to you. Regardless if you're drunk or hi or something like that you never cross the line with your boyfriend with another guy or girl. So I can synthesize why he moved out. Because you broke his Trust. But as for paying rent as roommates, I used to have a few roommates before. I came up with suggestion that the three of us would pay rent simultaneously. Meaning each of us will pay the the rent on each month. Meaning I would pay June rent, someone else will pay the rent for July, and the other would pay the rent for August. And we would go back and forth each month. I eventually had to move out because they kept laughing their music so loud that I could sleep in every time I turn it down to tell me not to touch their stuff and I couldn't take it anymore. It's hard to sleep when the music is blasting from the room across you.

Shizunk · Accepted Answer

So in this situation I would also break up with you and I would still help with the rent for a short while. However since he is not there, it is hard to demand that if he refuses. The reason I would feel the need to pay is that generally in the contract there tends to be a clause requiring you to announce in advance before you are actually able to leave and stop paying. I am used to that and to the fact that the reason for moving elsewhere doesn't matter, even if it was your fault. If he has no contract with anyone that makes this voluntary and I kind of get why he would refuse... So, yeah. I would pay personally, but if you pushed the matter hard I would let you know I dont actually owe you anything.
But then I tend to have good relationships with my exes in general, so that helps such matters usually...

Brainsbeforebeauty · Accepted Answer

So you sucked another guy's dick and because you said sorry, you think he shouldn't of broke up with you and on top of it, help you pay your rent? Are you kidding here? He did the right thing.. Why don't you ask the guy you gave the blowie to to pay your rent?

Paris13 · Accepted Answer

.. Apartment is in your name. No obligation except Coming from his Heart. Sadly YOU--Part... xx

YesICan · Answer

."yeah he broke up with me over something that shouldn't have been a break up but I still feel like a decent person would help pay "
."I got drunk and gave another guy head at a party"

Who raised you B?

"and apologized over and over but he wouldn’t accept it"

What is there to accept? You had another pair of nuts smacking the tip of your chin while you was choking on his cock. And you still somehow feel entitled that he should pay rent?

Is it fair to expect my ex to keep paying rent until I find a new roommate?

DonkeyDan · Answer

If his name is on the lease or rent book then yes he should pay until he has it removed. Otherwise he has no obligation to continue paying, what if you don't find another roommate, is he supposed to pay indefinitely? Your bit married and neither of you have any obligation to eachother. The pitfalls of a modern world in affrid. After my wife moved out of our home after the separation, I didn't ask her to pay towards the mortgage until we sold the place, I just took back what she would have owed from the final sale amount. And then the divorce was finalised.

Diodoro · Answer

This is why we have contracts. Since it was in your name it's legally your responsibility. Very shitty last minute to do. But yea, just sucks.

I could see his position aswell tho. Why pay for a place he has no ownership of and if things are sour between you the last thing he wants to do is a favor for you.

I imagine how the breakup occurred is part of why he left. In his mind he doesn't owe you any favors. In all seriousness you were mad to tell him to move his stuff from your room, pulling the "it's my house" card on it.

He just went right in line with what you did. It's your place. He's gone.

jshm2 · Answer

You've learned a valuable life lesson, kiddo: Never piss on your own house door.

It should have occurred to you from day one when you signed that lease that you needed his rent contribution to live your life, more than he did yours.

It's a common mistake a lot of kids make. Failing to realise that the people you live and work with, often have bigger contributions on your living than you like to think. Everyone likes to think they "don't need anyone" or "have nothing to lose" but it's never the case.

Anyway, dad lesson over. You should first and foremost speak to you landlord to update them. Could be they have another lined up, or will cut you some slack. If nothing, then speak to your family and friends before exploring other avenues.

Daniela1982 · Answer

I don't blame him for dumping you as obviously your relationship meant nothing. If there was no lease signed by him he did not break the lease so he owes you nothing. I mean do you really think he is going to help you after that? I guess you got your rude awakening.  I got out of paying her rent. I love it!

Sugar100 · Answer

Why did u end up living with boyfriend in first place? Y u can’t live alone n just see boyfriend weekly? Now u have this issue. I have a boyfriend but we don’t live together. Maybe living alone and just having boyfriend visit can help u from a lot of problems. Next time try live alone and live with boyfriend until you marry. I’m sure u are old enough to take care of yourself you don’t need boyfriend 24/7 with u. Now u r broken up and struggling with rent.

demonics · Answer

You sound like that chick who thinks ex boyfriends should still support her lifestyle until she gets a new dude... The level of 2021 is reaching disgusting levels...

InspecturGajit · Answer

No, if he doesn't live there he doesn't pay rent. And you cheated on him. He has the moral and more important legal high-ground. Why don't you see if the guy you gave head to will split the rent with you?

BrosephBrostar · Answer

"Oops, I accidentally sucked someone else's dick, teehee, now can you pay half my rent for me?" Nah, King's doing the right thing.

t-8900 · Answer

yeah the drunk excuse doesn't work because it's been overused and cliche. If you can't handle your consumption then simply dont drink. As far as him not paying the rent? Maybe there is some legal standing behind it BUT from a moral standing and if you are truly remorseful? Just let it go to be honest. You messed up, you failed him, you destroyed the trust and your image in his eyes. We all make mistakes but it's clear you hurt him badly. You must ultimately decide what to do.

Celtero · Answer

Why the hell is that his problem?

And why'd he break up with you anyway? By your entitled attitude I assume you cheated on him or something.

You're the one making unwise financial decisions. You really don't have enough savings to pay for one extra month of rent?

libsaretards · Answer

Your update shows what a person you are. A decent person does not cheat. He is right to leave you on your ass. He is not living there so he has no obligation to help someone who caused so much pain.

Chriscunning · Answer

So I think as a 'nice guy' I would offer to at least pay one months rent, despite ending on bad terms. Heck I even bought an ex food because she was struggling.

But i think it goes to show what type of person he is. If the going got tough he probably wouldn't support you much and it's usually in the bad times when it comes out.

Good luck.

ZackBan · Answer

Sorry to have to tell you but it has nothing to do with decency he doesn't owe you anything and while moving out without warning is a dick move the fact remains it's your place and you two broke up.
Asking for rent money will not work especially since it seems to me you messed up to begin with.
Now I don't know what you want but if you still want him in your life maybe give him a day or 2 and try working out the issue and getting back together

ohshee · Answer

First of all if his name is on the lease that he's liable for it yes he needs to pay if you broke up with you did he should have left. When he leaves he has to go rent a place anyway right so that's not right for him to be able to stay there for free he needs to pay you need to do what's right he's not always breaking up with you but he's using you at the same time kick his ass out or pay up

Miristheiss · Answer

If you gave another guy a sexual act then yeah, you should be dumped... he should move out right away if it is your place or he should kick you out ASAP if it is his place. Either way, he should immediately get your whoring, cheating, disgusting ass out of his life regardless of who moves and he shouldn't pay you a penny for anything and he should never have anything to do with you again.

Dragonpurple · Answer

Fair or not doesn't matter, life isn't fair... despite peoples best attempts to try and make it fair. Yet there is no reason to not ask but at the same time he probably needs to save up for a deposit so he can move out.

A tip on life in general though, if someone else is not legally responsible, usually they will never pay anything.

I'm surprised he even responded to you when you asked, so many will just ghost or block their ex.

qwert1234 · Answer

Do you have a contract that specifically says he needs to contribute until X time? If not, then maybe it's time to find a cheaper place.

I mean, decency or not, why would you expect him to share if he doesn't live there anymore? Where's the logic?

I won't even talk about your update. lol. This only makes things worse - for you.

DCooper · Answer

Your rent is not your ex's problem. And you have to be retarded if you think sucking some random dude off is anything short of a breakup situation. No dude with a shred of self respect engages in an 'exclusive' relationship with the town bicycle.

John_Doesnt · Answer

Think about it from his perspective: would you want to financially support someone you don't like and be forced to live with them? He clearly doesn't like you anymore and he wants to be as far away as possible.
Also, he probably likes the idea of not paying rent, so he can save some money for a security deposit. (unless his parents are forcing him to pay rent).
Put yourself in his position and you would do the same thing.

Flower7 · Answer

These are the types of risks when having a roommate, whether dating that person or not. If there's still a lot of time left on your lease, you'll probably just have to end your lease early to not have the burden of paying so much on your own.

Anonymous · Answer

Did you get the place together, or yours and he moved in? I think in this situation there's needs to be a bit of a compromise and have to think of it more in a Landlord type situation. He should give you some notice/time yes, but not necessarily until you find someone. Like if it took you 6 months say, no he shouldn't pay that long. But a months notice is reasonable.

MotorcycleMan · Answer

Typically when you rent, you'd pay first/last/deposit, so I feel like he at least owes you rent through the end of the month, and maybe the next month if there was short notice, but other than that, no.

Hypnos0929 · Answer

If he's on the lease he should help BUT it depends on why y'all broke up tbh.
If he cheated or broke it off he should help. If you cheated or broke it off then you've kinda gotta figure it out tbh. You could try to legally force him but that's really up to you.

boxxie2002 · Answer

100% fair if he is named on the lease as well.
He needs to pay until a new person to take over is found, as his name would be on the lease agreement for a fixed term?

If his name is not on the agreement, you can ask him to pay, but he probably does not have a legal obligation to even if there is a moral obligation

Anonymous · Answer

So many of these comments are hateful and judge-y lol you lot are tearing her down as if it’s you she cheated on, on top of that her question is about RENT not your thoughts regarding the cause of the break up. Anyway Asker, this question is a bit tricky because for the sake of fairness, I do believe he should pay some form of rent, not just bail out on such a big commitment. However, unless you have a written agreement or he’s on the lease, then there’s nothing you can do.

hhadeshatesme · Answer

“He broke up with me over something that shouldn’t have been a break up” “I got drunk and gave another man head” oh god lmao. He doesn’t owe you anything. You should have had money saved for situations like this.

Agape93 · Answer

If he's on the lease then yes he should be paying. But if he isn't, why would he pay a damn thing? I sure as shit wouldn't.

Wraith_Cemetery · Answer

Unfortunately for you, if it's not in writing then he doesn't have to pay for anything.

The other way around, all the girls in the comments would be saying "you go girl! fuck him, let him figure it out, don't pay for shit".

FilmGuy93 · Answer

No? Y’all broke up. Why the heck would you even want to stay in touch? Just eat lean for a little while.

Kiss_Me · Answer

Yes. He need to pay his half of the rent. You did not force, or kick him out. He moved out on his own. That in NO way removes his responsibility to pay his half of the rent.

David_Kek · Answer

Yes, you are being unreasonable. His name isn't on the lease, and he's not currently living there anymore. Would you pay rent for somewhere you don't live for someone you can't stand to look at?

Anonymous · Answer

Why does he have to pay for rent to a place he isn't living in? He doesn't owe you anything now

summiter · Answer

The lease is in your name so it is your responsibility. Haver your next roommate ( or boyfriend) pay part of the security deposit and his/her share of one months rent ahead of time.

elizamichale1 · Answer

Darling ur demand is quite unreasonable n he is not supposed to pay n share any rent n he is right it is your problem not his n come on we dont expect to go ask our ex to do favours...

MysteriousDarkness · Answer

1. Your boyfriend should pay for this month only and no more. He does not live with you and his name is not on the lease agreement so you are responsible for the rent beyond this month.

stevie123 · Answer

This one is always trouble. A real man wouldn't leave you with the tab, but we now know about this guy.. He should give you something , but don't count on it.

Avicenna · Answer

Well, given why you two broke up, I can see why he wouldn't want to help pay your rent, but if he won't, he needs to come get his stuff.

Anonymous · Answer

I had some sympathy for you until i read what actually happened. Come on, really? This 100% your fault, I think you get to 100% own the consequences of that.

Y2KxD · Answer

Bitch, fuck you, he is right, it's not his problem. I bet $350 if the shoe was on the other foot, you'd say fuck you to him too.

Dude_777 · Answer

LMAO, i was finding a good entertaining accidental cheating question and here it is.

HighValue · Answer

You are both adults and he is not your parent. He has no responsibility to pay for anything for you.

es20490446e · Answer

The streets are full of people who like their cock sucked to pay your rent, you only need to wear the appropriate attire.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

you're being unreasonable. He doesn't live there. he's not your boyfriend. "I told him to move his stuff into the spare room and stay there" you have no right to tell him this and have him accept it.

Anonymous · Answer

If his name wasn't on the lease, nothing you can do unfortunately.

rcljr · Answer

If his name is on the lease he’s on the hook for rent, if he’s not on the lease it’s all on you.

admles · Answer

Your lease, your problem lol Next time maybe put him on the lease?

Anonymous · Answer

Depends. Can he keep having sex with you once a month until he finds another girlfriend?

Twalli · Answer

He's not residing there so he has no duty to pay any rent.

888theGreat · Answer

I know you are a female , but you can't order another person around and spend their money. You broke up with him and apparently was with another guy.

noohair · Answer

First, Life is not fair. Second, is there a written agreement? Is he under any legal obligation to pay you anything?

Jamie05rhs · Answer

This is why you don't move in together if you're not married.

Anonymous · Answer

“I got drunk and gave another guy head” wow. Confessing was the right thing to do, maybe you’ll learn from this for your next relationship, but what the fuck. Reminding me why I avoid women

Archerer · Answer

Ouch. That’s tough… there’s no easy answer. Is he working, making good money?

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

The Apartment is in your name. He doesn't owe you nothing.

allaboutyou2 · Answer

If he is still living in the property, yes but if he has moved out, no.

anylolone · Answer

You shouldn't expect, but there's no reason not to try and ask.

ItsMeItsMe1989 · Answer

Nope, only if you have a child together, and even that, is iffy

jimmy2 · Answer

Well as long as he is there. But i thnk he should leave

douride2 · Answer

If he is moved out why should he be paying rent.

Is it fair to expect my ex to keep paying rent until I find a new roommate?

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Is it fair for my boyfriend to expect me to pay half the rent for months I will not be living w him?

Is it fair to expect my ex to keep paying rent until I find a new roommate?

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Is it fair for my boyfriend to expect me to pay half the rent for months I will not be living w him?

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