I want to have kids but my boyfriend doesn't. How do we make this work out?

[Anonymous]

[MrOracle]

You "work it out" by either breaking up now, or by staying together for a while knowing that you don't have long-term compatibility, so that you'll break up eventually.

Do NOT assume that you will be able to change his mind - you probably won't be able to do so even if you try really, really hard. The biggest mistake you can make in any relationship is to believe that you can change your partner. You have to be able to accept them AS THEY ARE, not how you'd like them to be.

Clearly, you didn't take long-term compatibility into account when you started dating this guy, so you didn't do your job, and to no one's surprise, you lack long-term compatibility. If you want a serious, long-term relationship, then you have to put in a significant effort up-front (during the early dating process, before you make or expect any commitment from each other) to vet your partner for long-term compatibility - and you have to be prepared to walk away if you learn that you don't have it. That's how the process works, and there are no shortcuts or alternatives. Once you're in a commitment, you've "bought" that person "as-is" - like buying a used car with no warranty - so it will be up to you to deal with any of the issues you don't like.

[Recurrence]

Entrap him by creating a new human being, using it as a pawn in a malevolent game of multi level manipulation.

Or try couples counseling or really have a brain to brain sit down communication session.

[SecretsofKB]

You need to sit and have a long, serious talk with him about this now. Don't wait.

If you can't figure it out now, then what happens if get married and he still doesn't want kids?

Figure it out now. You two may not be together afterwards, but it'll save both of you heartache in the future.

[jahaims]

That is why you discuss your values, morals and goals before becoming serious.

[Anonymous]

Poke a hole in the condom