Ladies and Gentlemen, if your spouse or partner came out to you as bi or transgender, What Would You Do?

Question

They want to keep the relationship. Choose your decision on the poll and explain why you chose what you chose.

sawno · Accepted Answer

Possibly break up, because I gave her plenty of opportunity to come out openly, and she knows she can tell me anything. If she suddenly came out now after all this time it means she lied to me for over a year. Which wouldn't be a you are Bi so its an issue kind of thing, it would be a you lied to me for over a year so its an issue.

If it's a genuine new development though i'd of course always be open to her telling me that she is developing that interest.

As far as trans its an instant breakup no matter what. Not into that and not what I signed up for.

ShatteringRedGalore · Accepted Answer

I feel like for guys its not that complicated
Women tend to be far more open about things anyways
they are more likely to be LGBTQ.. or have a fluid sexuality

but for women I am sure there are many who would be uncomfortable
because its a bit more rare in men

WhatTheHeckkkk · Accepted Answer

Leave. I’m sorry, but I am not interested in transgender women or men, and I would prefer if my partner was heterosexual.  I would still support their decision, but I couldn’t be with them.

TrueConfection · Accepted Answer

It would be over. I couldn't live with him if he changed teams.

BluishGaze · Answer

I can handle having a partner who is bisexual, so long as she is only interested in me, and me alone. If she's saying this because she's unsure about her sexuality, I'm going to break up with her. I do not want to be part an "experiment."

As for "transgender" — Did you mean "transsexual?" Being biologically male? Or just gender identity?

For me, it doesn't matter either way, because I am not attracted to the male body, nor am I attracted to masculinity. Even if it was a transwoman that "passes," I would still break up because (1) the sex will get awkward cause us to start drifting apart, and (2) I would like to be the biological father of my children.

DarkWinterNights · Answer

Bi would bother me because they would have had to lie to me previously. If they came out as trans it would be a deal breaker. If I’m dating a woman I want to be dating a woman. If she wanted to transition I wouldn’t be able to work that out at all. If she had already transitioned previous, it would fall under the same issue as Bi. Non binary is a whole different issue full of drama that I do not have the patience to deal with. I would respectfully break up with them. Just be honest with people up front and save everyone the trouble.

MCheetah · Answer

Immediately leave them for the lies and deception, if I can manage to not curse them out for scamming/gaslighting me. I actually did have this happen to me before with my first "girlfriend" who was revealed to me to be queer exactly like the question asked, and I was heartbroken, extremely pissed off, and devastated by it. I got used by a lesbian. Never again.

Medicalbug · Answer

Depends. Bi shouldn’t be an issue if they are truly committed to me and just like gay porn (or have had male partners before me). Trans is fine if they are non binary but I’m not gay so I wouldn’t want my male partner to transition into a woman. If that’s the plan then I would stay friends and support them, but not continue a sexual relationship.

Emogirl999 · Answer

My boyfriend is Bi and I still love and support him the same amount as before he told me. Who he is attracted to doesn't matter as long as he likes me and I like him. If I dated someone who came out as Trans I would be surprised but depending on how long we have been dating and how strong the relationship is, I'd stay with them and work through things.

Kaneki05 · Answer

How would them been Bi change anything? lmao.  Now trans that does because that means that they want to be a guy and I ain't into guys.

NobleFlight · Answer

If they were transgender I would gently let them know that I would no longer like to be in a relationship with them. I am not into guys, or people that have been guys in the past. If they are bi I don't mind, doesn't matter to me.

MrOracle · Answer

Bi wouldn't be a problem - I've dated bi girls before.

Transgender would be an instant deal-breaker, and I make that very clear from the start. I'm 100% straight and am only romantically interested in women who were born women and want to be women.

I will always be the ONLY man in my relationships, in any sense of word.

OpenClose · Answer

If she thinks she might be bi, I say she invite someone over.

Transitioning to a man would be a tougher pill to swallow, but there are some guys I'm into so I'd give it a shot. If she was coming out to me that she IS trans MtF, then if she's cute, she's cute. I mean if she still has the guy parts that won't work since that's the main thing I don't like about guys. But I'd wait it out a bit if she has the plans.

Anonymous · Answer

If he came out as bi it really wouldn't make any practical difference in our relationship as he's married to me. However, if he came out as trans that would be extremely difficult. I might try to work things out because I love him, but I honestly don't see how it wouldn't end up in divorce.
Fortunately the trans thing isn't going to happen, but if it did that would be extremely difficult.

EmmaMary · Answer

I would immediately be getting divorce papers drawn up and issued.

BonnieBoo · Answer

I’d support him as best as I could. I’d still stay with him, I fell in love with his personality & not how he looks. I’d even help him with his makeup hair & clothes. I love my husband no matter what he looks like. So yeah I’d stay with him.

Aerissa_Jade · Answer

Transgender, don't see how that can work but Bi could work. Ultimately though, that is not a decision I could really make in advance, I'd have to be in that situation to see how my heart and mind react to it.

Evan64 · Answer

My partner told me that she may fall under the nonbinary category a few months ago. It's not an issue for me- I told her that I'd support her regardless of what she decides to do with all of that.

Nagahime · Answer

Bi wouldn't really be that big of an issue, I guess. I would still prefer to be with a guy who was just into women, though. Trans on the other hand, no way. I don't wanna date a woman disguised as a "man".

Account · Answer

I would not care about that. It wouldn't change anything, however I would hate that they lied to me and kept it hidden

dtweed1996 · Answer

It depends really if me and my girlfriend were more intimate not like in a way of expressing constant love but trusted each other more I’d probably accept it and maybe keep her even if she became a he or something but honestly it won’t be easy

IveGotNoName · Answer

Bi I can live with, transgender I would support but I couldn't be with them anymore, because I'm straight.

slatyb · Answer

Bi would be ok, although surprising. If they wanted to transition they would be doing that without me. But that’s not happening, she’s quite feminine.

Anonymous · Answer

You better share the other bitch with me otherwise get the fuck out I want somebody to massage my feet wow the other one is allowing me to throb inside her.

AndrésC64 · Answer

Probably a very unpc answer, but I think that I might be able to deal with them being bi. But I wouldn't be able to deal with them being transgender.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Bi stay trans dump them. Basically all girls are bi so thats no surprise. Its perfectly normal. Trans or anything like that is totally fucked up and immoral. So no id run fast.

Dchrls78104 · Answer

Dump that trash at once! I invited a woman into my life, I did not invite an impostor or an intruder to trespass on my property!

jasco · Answer

If she's bi thats fine but if she's trans. Instant leave

jahaims · Answer

Bi it wouldn't change anything. Transgender would be a divorce.

AdithyaR · Answer

I'd stay. It won't change how I see them, I'd still care for them and support them.

driven159 · Answer

find out where their head is at and go from there if she was bi and my wife then threesomes might be fun

Anonymous · Answer

Bi is fine. If trans, then I might leave. If the transition actually started happening, then I would leave.

Aiko_E_Lara · Answer

Bi is fine but transgender? Definitely leaving "her"

lrina · Answer

i'm fine with them being bi, idrc. but trans? no.

sheikalana · Answer

I would support them 100% and stay by their side.

2021biguy · Answer

Bi is ok, but transgender is a lot different.

HeartFullOfGlue · Answer

I'd try working things out

KatherineJ · Answer

I would leave.

FearlessHero7 · Answer

Pray the gay away

Gosselinfan · Answer

I would leave

Anonymous · Answer

Not an issue for me.

jimmy2 · Answer

Damn thats cold

Ladies and Gentlemen, if your spouse or partner came out to you as bi or transgender, What Would You Do?

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Ladies and Gentlemen, if your spouse or partner came out to you as bi or transgender, What Would You Do?

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