How does having a girlfriend change your life? Does it make it better or worse? Any horror stories?

Question

What I read about it that it just adds to your life it's not supposed to make it better or worse?

DaveJord · Accepted Answer

Well there are always pros and cons... I guess the optimum situation is finding some who complements your life style, but doesn't change it unless you're looking for change... and if you're in a relationship and looking for change then you might need to change girlfriends.

There is not enough space under the character limit for me to tell you my horror story. But let me tell you I was married for 22 years to the same women and it was a very long and drawn out slow bleeding, toxic and dysfunctional relationships filled with mental and emotional abuse for well over a decade.

So don't date women with high level insecurities or any type of history of mental health issues. If you start to recognize the signs of anything like this bringing dysfunction into your relationship don't try to be noble about it... get out of that relationship. Because it is like they condition you into accepting their dysfunctional abusive behavior, and it really hard to say if its done intentional or if it sub-conscious or passive behavior. But it does not happen all at once some times its a slow transition that build in more and more dysfunctional behaviors and if there is any level of denial about then you need to run as fast as you can from it.

Signs to look for, gas lighting, passive aggressive behavior, logical explanations for things that defy reason, victim mentality, mood swings. For me these behavior would appear for a day or two then dissipate for weeks or months... then it slowly became reappear with more and more consistency with gradually more persistent dysfunctional behaviors. So you would have a day or two of high anxiety type behavior, followed by weeks or months of really great and happy times... then out of the blue something triggers her again into a depressive state, followed again by a cooling off period... then it turns into a week of high anxiety and stress on you, then a month or of great times and happiness then starts happen every other week, then every other day great day t... to the point you can't even remember when you felt like you were in a normal relationship. It can take years over a decade or more for you to reach that breaking piont because you have been condition to accept their abusive pattern of behavior.

But for me after divorce I did much better for my self in the dating world because I know the signs. And my current girlfriend is a amazing and she seriously make my life better and more happy.

Lliam · Accepted Answer

I had girlfriends from the age of 16. I like women. I think they are adorable and fascinating. I like the way they look, feel, sound, think and behave.

When in a relationship and you are both infatuated with each other, the sex is out of this world.
But aside from the sex, it's great to have a best friend to go places, do things, hang out, chat with, and confide in. I love holding hands with a lovely lady or walking with our arms around each other. It's really nice to share experiences with someone special.

The downside is the possibility that the relationship might not work out. But if they don't you just keep looking for a new relationship until you find the perfect fit. Try, try again.

And with each relationship, you learn, become more mature and more capable of being the man worth being loved by the right woman.

midnightmoon05 · Accepted Answer

A partner who is willing to work with you, is what you said… add to your life.
a partem who is not will to stand by your side… can’t be hard and that can be a learning experience to understand yourself and how to pick better.

exitseven · Answer

I think it was fun to get a girlfriend. I was 19 and a freshman in college. It was fun to have somebody to go to the movies with or go out for ice cream. It was pretty awesome when we would drive in my car and she would sit really close to me and sometimes rest her head on my shoulder if it was late at night. I would walk her back to her dorm room and we would stand outside her door with our arms around each other just talking about stuff. I guess she made me feel like one of the cool kids.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

How things “ought to be” is mostly academic. What we have is what matters most. Acceptance is the key to happiness. Know your worth and set boundaries. Unfortunately, people are flawed. So meaningful connections are typically both good and bad, often simultaneously. If you can accept the bad with the good, that’s about as close to how it “ought to be” as you can get. Problem is, not everyone knows their true worth, few know how to set healthy boundaries and fewer yet have learned acceptance. If you can do all of that, and if you can find someone else who does too, you’ll likely be happy.

hahahmm · Answer

This is like asking, 'how does liquid in your cup change your life.' Well it depends on the liquid, right? Sewage water? Acid? Gasoline? Virus ridden blood? Guys need to be very careful who they date but some are too dumb to do that and think life is 100% about how she looks.

Guy13 · Answer

You know have something greater than Self in your life and one hopes "we" grow in togetherness. Women are more fragile so it more difficult for typical men. They come with both said and unsaid demands and expectations. Unpacking all that is not easy nor can it be timed to occur. Some days are better than others.

Jltakk · Answer

Good question. Some people need that external charge in their life, some prefer to say alone. I would love having someone there to be with, but I have next to nothing to offer anyone. It would surprise me more than anything if a girl was actually willing to be a part of my life.

raddisn · Answer

Not true for all of us. We need that interaction with the opposite sex to do things with and share daily lives with. Try being alone for year and see how it feels

Adam1978 · Answer

If she doesn't improve it she will become an ex. It's that simple. Why put in the effort of a relationship if you lose on it? She needs to add more value than the effort required is worth.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

A good relationship can make your life 10 times better, but a bad relationship can make your life 1000 times worse.

Anonymous · Answer

It all depends on who you're with. The right woman can be a guys deepest well of strength. The wrong one can be the biggest anchor tied around his neck.

NathanDavis · Answer

your bed smells nicer, always...

VanillaSalt · Answer

If your comfortable on your own it adds to it if your not it becomes a necessary part of it and slows you down.

maximumpower · Answer

Has ALWAYS made it initially better, but then worse. Far too many are only looking for a sugar daddy/support network/baby daddy.

Avicenna · Answer

It will greatly change your life, hopefully only for the better

slatyb · Answer

Mostly better. I hate living alone. However there was one that made my life much much worse.

TwoToTooTutu2 · Answer

You have less money. But you have a best friend.

Wubs3000 · Answer

Much better and happier

Ajsiaotong · Answer

Better and happier

Splatmate22 · Answer

It deponds on pwr person

LazerBean · Answer

Depends on the girl

Anonymous · Answer

I was used as a backup

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