Boyfriend erased laptop before giving it to me, suspicious?

[Anonymous]

So, my boyfriend recently bought himself a new laptop for his programming projects he does on the side, and I asked him what he was going to do with the old one and he said I could have it, as mine was failing and the screen had lots of bad pixels.

I asked him when I could have it and he said he just has to transfer his data and wipe it, and I said just copy the stuff no need to wipe it and he said he has to wipe it, all his private data is on there and his logins and I said I Would just log him out and he said that no, he would be wiping it, you never give a computer to someone without erasing it first and I can't help but feel he's hiding something, am I right?

You are right, he shouldn't be wiping it if he hasn't anything to hide

He is right he should wipe it, the stuff is private

[youngmix]

Used computers, especially for a programmer, are filled with files and programs that are useless for the average consumer. He just gave you a clean and positive experience, and you should thank him for doing you a service.

I am a programmer, and I have 20 or 30 programmer specific programs installed (maybe more), with some of those programs running automatically, and countless files clogging up 100's of gigabytes. I cannot imagine giving someone a computer in that state, when I can easily clear RAM and memory drive space.

Also, there is a general security risk involved with having your passwords stored on various systems. It is best to simply commit to due diligence, and clear your personal information from a system that you will not be using. This is standard behavior.

If you feel like he should not do this with his girlfriend, then my advise is to be upfront and ask him to show you all of his accounts. Then you can check all of his messages, search history, emails, and online interactions, like Instagram follows. You will hopefully trust him after this. But be aware, you will generally have to pay for accusing someone of being untrustworthy.

[TheoPfeifle]

That last paragraph... That's grounds for me to exit a relationship. Your insecurities are not remedied by poking around in things that aren't yours. In fact, it would cause me to wonder what you're up to, to not be able to trust me. In my past relationships... EVERY time I was accused without cause, she was already doing what she was accusing me of. So, again, it would be grounds to terminate the relationship.

[Aerissa_Jade]

If he wiped and reset windows, that is a good thing... it will be faster, and clean for a fresh start.

I find that standard procedure, not suspicious as I do the same thing on old computers I'm giving away, even IF I trust someone a 100%, simply because it helps them start fresh and what if we break up and now I don't trust them and they potentially have sensitive information. That can stay there for a long time, but I really just like the whole start fresh.

Besides what could he be hiding, porn? just ask him and see what he says if your worried about that.

[The_Shadow_Dweller]

It's really literally that easy.

[CalmMind]

I work as a network admin for a managed service provider. This is extremely standard procedure. Basic security practices dictate when removing a device from your ownership you remove any and all personal information (typically through many write cycles to actually overwrite the data with noise) so that they are not misused by another person whether intentionally or not. I don't know your work history or your competency with computer systems (I'm going to assume not much as this is pretty basic entry level stuff) but there's a good chance you don't practice safe internet etiquette. You likely click on things without even considering what certain things mean, like people that don't verify they have a secure connection via HTTPS protocol when browsing their bank's website or shopping as well as checking SSL certs and country of origin for said traffic (geofiltering ftw). This lack of understanding of the technical underpinnings of computer usage is enough to give your average and above "techie" a heart attack when they see it. Be grateful he gave you his equipment and say thank you.

[Anonymous]

I would wipe any laptop or electronic device before giving it to anyone.

Back in college my roommates girlfriend asked if she could use my computer to finish writing a college paper (nice laptops were more rare back then). What did the snooping cunt do? She look into my internet history and read up on all the porn sites I looked at. The cunt later made a mocking comment about it among a group of people later. Suffice it to say I never let her use my laptop again (or anybody I don’t know)

Anyway he might if used it look at porn, post on forums/websites like GAG, etc. However it is HIS laptop. His property. He spent money on it. HIS private life. It’s none of your business. He it giving it to you as a favor and you have zero right to know what he did with it earlier. None.

Now if you two were married there might be a different case to be made here. But your not. And frankly the fact a part of you feels entitled to know about his private life is a sign there is more of a problem with you than vice versa.

[OlderAndWiser]

The laptop potentially contains passwords for online banking. It may also contain communications with previous girlfriends that he wants to preserve without actually maintaining any relationship with that ex. And he has NO guarantee of how long you two will continue to be together and whether you might want to cause him any harm after a breakup.

[Apple1996]

He should def wipe it clean just so you won't have to deal with any of his old stuff on there.

[MrOracle]

I would never, ever hand someone an old device that hasn't been wiped and fully reset. This is absolutely standard practice and the ONLY way to have any kind of data security. You might not care about that, but this way, if you choose to put your data at risk, it's only YOUR data. If he had his information on it, YOU could put HIS data at risk - knowingly or unknowingly.

This has nothing at all to do with your relationship, and EVERYTHING to do with best computing practices and data security.

[Abchahaha]

I always clean my laptop when I decided to give it to someone else for permanent use. There is nothing suspicious with it. There are privates stuffs, may include some porn collections or whatever but It shouldn't be of your concern since the way he treats you is more important that those things. Just ask him if you curious about his porn favour lol. Also it saves other people time when they want clearance.

Also, modern software and emails link to a lot of things, including his works, and tons of other important stuff, like bank accounts, emails etc. So yeah, even if you are his wife, that would be quite sensitive let alone his girlfriend.

[matchrestore]

I'm not hiding anything from anyone, but I'd still wipe my laptop. There's tax documents, bank statements, saved passwords, saved credit cards, medical documents, employment documents, etc. that I would not want to have fall into the wrong hands.

[DaveJord]

At the end of the day your just a girlfriend and not his wife or anything... its probably not you but if you took it the right tech they could get the information off it. When your dating someone you never know how it will end. Me personally I would never give up laptop or phone with out wiping or factory resetting it for the same reasons. I have all my bank accounts and log in info on my devices.

And even if he is hiding something he has a right to do that as well. And if you got that paranoid about it I would question if you were the right person for me. I think you're over reacting.

[TheoPfeifle]

It's standard procedure to wipe your data from any device you are getting rid of. He won't be using it, so his data would be needlessly taking up space you could use, if he didn't. He optimized a device for you to use, giving you the maximum potential of the equipment by removing his data that reduces your storage potential... And you want to get suspicious?

You need to look inside yourself and discover the insecurities causing your mindset. You are looking at a correlation without causation... Creating your own anxiety over an imaginary causation.

[bolverk]

No he's not hiding something, he is just keeping his private data private.
How would you feel if he rifled through your your phone, as that would be the same thing that you suggested by him giving you the laptop unwiped, there be data on the laptop from long before he met you, or if he's been using it for work there could be work sensitive information on the laptop.
If he's had any sense he'll have used a Mil Spec overwrite program to delete any data, bar the OS and common programs at a minimum, but personally I'd have done a hard reinstall of the OS and common programs as I keep those on back up media.

[Anonymous]

You shouldn't be looking for ways to trust people, you should be looking for ways to remove trust as a potential problem.

Taking something like this personally is just about the most rediculously immature thing i can think of.

There is no cost what so ever in wiping it, it provides enourmous amounts of protection and removes the requirement for trust.

ANY TIME you can do something like that in ANY KIND of relationship it is complete no brainer that you do that.

You get something for nothing, its even than getting something like a free computer without complaining about the colour.

[slatyb]

GTF over this. He's your boyfriend, not your clone. He's entitled to have private thoughts, and to have private correspondence with others. People may tell him things that they would rather not be shared. It would be the same even if you were married. If you don't trust him, then don't date him.

[Dinklex3]

Why would you not want him to wipe it?

If anything, it's more suspicious that you don't want him to. So you plan on going into all of his accounts (banks, school, social media, shopping) and viewing each and every website he visits?

Why give someone something with all of your stuff still in it?

I've given away old cell phones and i wipe them clean as well.

[admles]

Right? It's common sense.
I bet she thought she was going to have a lovely, free, unrestricted snoop and he took that hope away from her.

[WindAtMyBack]

Wiping a computer is a VERY good habit for a number of reasons. It might seem suspicious to you, but to a lot of people it's just the normal way of doing things.

I would never consider giving a computer to someone without wiping it. There is nothing on my computer that I don't want anyone seeing. A complete stranger or the FBI or anyone else can look at anything on my computer. But if I gave it to someone I would wipe it.

[Chill_Thoughts]

It's his stuff, he probably doesn't have anything sus in there. At the very most maybe some porn. But when you give someone a laptop, you wipe it. You aren't giving them something with all your work, email, etc. still linked, it just makes sense to give a laptop that's as new and the new owner's as possible

[BeenThereLovedIt]

Computer guy here,

Anyone who doesn't wipe their old computers, tablets, or smartphones is a complete fool and years later stands there, stupefied at how they possibly got their identity stolen.. again. Only never to connect the dots. How I mock thee.

[AviatorTom]

Not only is his stuff private, by deleting his files he made room for you to put whatever you want on the laptop. He should also have deleted any apps that you probably wouldn't use, especially any he has a paid subscription to. He did the correct thing and you shouldn't be suspicious.

Let's use another analogy. He buys a new couch and offers to give you the old one. Would you expect to get his couch all messy and dirty, or should he clean it first?

[crossdressingrihno]

I gave my step brother my old laptop and all I had on it was a bunch of steam games and recording software but still wiped the computer despite not actually having anything to hide. It’s not always about secrets sometimes it’s just about feeling of security or the principle of having privacy. I bet you don’t let your boyfriend watch you put in a tampon even though I’m sure he’s aware you use them.

[PamelaRivers]

there is more than one way to see that. If he'd said he is wiping it to clear up space that would be one thing but if he is afraid to let you see that he is moving to the new one, I'd wonder.

And wiping the computer is advised if it is going to a stranger who may try to take over accounts, not sure I'd go that far if it were someone I trusted.

[admles]

It's like, common sense, and standard practice, to wipe a computer before giving it to someone else, regardless of who they are.

Sounds to me like you just thought you'd have unrestricted access for snooping, and are now pissed off you can't.

[DeepRockGalactic]

Wiping your stuff is common practice in the tech industry. If he's in that industry then there are no problems.

It's done in case you mess something and end up exposing important documents which may include not only his work but also legal documents about him. Data privacy is taken very seriously in the industry. The best that can happen is somebody gets his data. The worst that can happen is a lawsuit.

Did you talk to him why? He should give you an explanation if you have.

[HighValue]

Any past credit card information, possibly social security number, etc. could all be in its memory unless he does wipe it first. At least do a disc clean up and system defrag along with deleting all cookies and web history to get rid of the auto fill in stuff.