How to show boyfriend that I’m here for him?

[petriana21]

my boyfriend that broke up with me because he didn’t love hisself how do I show him I’m still here and that I got him. Even if he still is communicating with me

[242plusInfinity]

Just have him fix his self-image. It doesn't take that long if you stay consistent with it. It's like any other habit. Beliefs are just habits really.

[petriana21]

So should I just give him space

[242plusInfinity]

No! He clearly doesn't know how to change his self-image and he is too busy in his bad self-image to be any help to himself. You both gotta have an understanding of how it alters and then you have to have him implement it and you have to hold in accountable when his old self-image tries to hold him back. If you do this you'll pretty much get your boyfriend back because the problem will be gone.

[petriana21]

Gotcha. When we were talking all he kept saying was he don’t love hisself so he can’t love me

[242plusInfinity]

He is correct in that. You can only give what you have. A poor dad cannot give his son riches. A angry person cannot give his people happiness for he only gives them anger. By will he may deviate but it will be only for a time. That is why people diet, lose weight, and gain it right back.

[petriana21]

He thinks I’m supposed to leave his side all because he’s going through this. I do feel like because I didn’t give him the break he wanted a while back this is kinda the time now where everything is just clashing together. I told him that I don’t see this as a breakup I see it as a break this is the time for us to both work on somethings and when we come back together we will come back 10x harder. I feel as though I’m selfish with feelings and I know I can’t be that way when it comes to the other partner wanting to take a break or work on themselves

[242plusInfinity]

Look your guy isn't going to change by himself. If that was the case he would have already done it. However, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink.

At the moment he is sabotaging himself. That's why you cannot date him until his image changes. You gotta get him to commit to altering the image. So that means you have to first understand how to alter it. You cannot give something you don't have. Once you have it, you can give it to him. If you can get him to commit to altering it and to really doing the work... It really can work out for you two.
You gotta get him too, "stop trying to fix what's wrong..." and focus on what is going to alter it.

You have to sell him on a better life...

[petriana21]

Gotcha. It’s going to be a working progress but everything will be ok we came back from a lot of stuff and I know we can come back from this it just t takes time. I’m probably just overthinking it

[242plusInfinity]

Once you come back from this... You'll never have a problem you cannot solve. I promise you that. Because the answer you find will blow your mind. Sounds like you need it just as much as him.
While you are going through this, you should remember this statement: "Stop trying to fix what's wrong and instead focus on what's right." You know the solution so just focus on your plan and how great things will be once you implement your plan. Focus on how it makes you feel. It will keep you straight so you can pull this off. No matter what happens... Reject it. Focus on what's right. Reject everything that is not going to help you.

EE Cummings: “Trust your heart if the seas catch fire, live by love though the stars walk backward.” It was a quote I learned it from the movie Charlie St. Cloud with Zac Efron. The movie is about lost causes and how there is no such thing as a lost cause. St. Jude.

- Good luck.