What makes people *almost* into me and then they back out or leave at the last second?

[yourpalval]

Lol it's a loaded question I know you can't answer without more info I'm just pissed dude. All year it's been a bunch of freaking ALMOSTS. Have you ever *almost* been into someone or gotten with them, but you changed your mind? Why did you?

[FilmGuy93]

I've been there... So... I'm going to be painfully real about something, but it's not meant to be a shot at you in particular in any way. I'm saying this in a super general way about women I've been involved with. I hope you'll find value in this response.

Whenever I find myself (and other men I've spoken with have found themselves) in a situation like the one you're describing, one (or usually more) of the following three things have ALWAYS happened:

1. Post-nut clarity made me realize that all the "cute," "quirky" things about her that I used find endearing are actually super friggin annoying. Even if I like other parts of her, the thought of interacting with her moving forward makes me genuinely irritated. (second most common)

2. The woman (or one of her friends) does/says something after the sex that is inexcusably cringe and I get the ick like no one's business. (the most common)

3. I like who she is, there's nothing wrong with her as a person, but the sex is irredeemably awful. (this one is pretty rare)

[BarryLiverstone]

Sometimes guys will either lie or play the game to boast they are more than they can execute. So when you call their bluff they are caught and back out of it. Being attractive means you will have guys who feel intimated like they would blow their chance of future encounters cuz they think you will find someone better if they mess up

[HollyK21]

I’ve been there before and tbh I don’t think it’s so much them backing out as them not having been willing to invest in the first place. The biggest mistake I made repeatedly in the past was not asking a guy’s intentions for talking to me, I just went with the flow because I didn’t want to like, ruin anything or scare him off or whatever. But those were always the guys who weren’t wanting to commit, invest in, or prioritize a relationship. Everything changed once I started asking the right questions. For instance I wouldn’t even waste time on someone if he “just got out of a relationship” or “really busy with work, looking for something casual” or “I’m not sure what I want yet but we can see where it goes”, and the list of excuses goes on lol.

[DizzyDesii]

2022 is definitely the year of almosts. No one this year even made it past two weeks and its been back and forth of dropping them or them dropping me. I’d say its because I know what i want while none of them knew what they wanted. And even then, we didn't want the same goals in life at the same time. Plus there was the added stress from eachothers work or family issues. But it is what it is. I get to be on to the next and keep hoping for the best 😝 I rather knock all the waste of timers out the ballpark sooner than later

[MannMitAntworten]

Most of my almost were back when I was entertaining online dating. Between them looking and behaving different in person … well, they were often just too different from what they claimed to be for me to want to carry forward.

[loveslongnails]

You don't know everything about a person after one meeting, and sometimes you don't know enough after 20 meetings. Something happens along the way that triggers your "get out now" button, or that's how it works with me.

[HighlyQuestionable]

Being "almost" into someone is a rarity for me. I am either 100% in or not at all.

Val, is that you in the picture? I can't imagine a guy being "almost" into you. (just being honest).

[Billlewis]

I've had that happen occasionally, but I can't imagine it happening with a woman as gorgeous as you are.

[Blueeyes81]

Anytime I was almost into someone it was because I couldn't make up my mind if I found them attractive or not. One day I'd be attracted and the next I wouldn't be.

[ArtemisSilver]

Usually it's something you say or an annoying behavior.

[Andres77]

Their criminal records check came back

[In_Trance]

must be something you're saying or doing (or not)

[Bklynbadboy12]

I know what it is and I think you know too