I share an office with a coworker who I am highly attracted to, who is married, as am I. He is constantly flirting with me and is complimenting me and I like it- A LOT and we have both agreed not to act on it. I love my husband and do not know what to do. We have not been intimate with each other is months due to conflicting schedules and I feel that this is where it’s coming from- but I just don’t know what to do. Opinions?
Any crush will get stronger as much as you expose yourself to your target.
So they only (painful) way is to cut everything you can: tell him you need to block his contacts on phone for the health of your marriage, and you do that. Avoid situations that could make you picture physical closeness with him like being together alone in the same room etc, any context that can push your desires up. The ideal thing is to change jobplace, or job role that doesn't make you meet him regularly.
Another thing that might help is to try being extremely realistic about him: he is not perfect, not ideal, for sure. He has probably very ugly sides, might be capriceous, his routine when settled long term might be dull and annoying, and what he is having with his wife would be what you'd get (if he is bored and looks around for other women, well, you'd get a man who is potentially not honest or respectful, and not exciting either). He might have communication issues when facing conflicts, and whatnot. Many people are full of flaws we don't see because they behave the best in our presence, but the real self is other. So keep this in mind too, picture his bad sides as an actual possible thing.
On the other side, work to make your marriage get a spark again: when you can get a couple of days of vacation, organize something different than your norm: a trip somewhere, an experience that is different, where you sleep elsewhere. Going around would push you both looking better before walking among tourists in a new place so you'd be both more attractive, and you'd sleep in a place that is clean, safe, cool and possibly romantic, most likely refreshing some passion.
At home you can consider new sex toys (imagine those remote vibrators where your husband presses a button and it vibrates, while you're not together), new practices, sexting sending pics while not together to charge his appetite for when he'll be back at home, and other creative things.
I'm sure there is still a lot to explore with your husband before looking for someone else!
Firstly I see your age is between 25 + 29 and in no circumstances should your sex life already be dormant babe no matter what your schedules, when two people are sexually active and sexually attracted to there partner - you make time and do it when ever and where ever! When your in your 20's they should be your wildest and constantly having it years, this alone tells a me a qualified behaviourist there is something missing and possibly un fixable with your relationship due to the way we all mature.
I also take it that you must of got married young? It's a well known fact that men and women's taste in a partner changes, when women reaches 26yrs there taste in men is cemented and your very unlikely to change the type of man your looking for and with men that age is 29yrs old. So the men you were attracted to up un till then are not usually the same type of man you permanently become attracted to and the same with men!
Going to be straight up with you - I don't believe you are still in love with your husband and I don't believe that your husband is still in love with you. I think you care a lot for each other and probably do 'love' each other just like we also 'love' our pets but it's not the same as 'In love' with someone! I no that younger people that enter into long term relationships and marriages because of there age become co- dependant on each other, it becomes a habit to be with that person and they believe this is love or want it to be love, but it isn't!
Lastly for a women to become sexually attracted to someone other than her partner is on it's own the clearest sign you can get that somethings missing and there is no 'in love' feelings towards there spouse there! It's common phycology of the way all women are emotionally and psychologically made.
Tough situation. I think you are going to have to change job location lest you both finally give into temptation.
And you seriously need to find time to sleep with your husband lest temptation overwhelms you.
If all of the people You’ve mentioned agree with multiple polygamy, I don’t see why You shouldn’t ask Your coworker out. Personally, polyandry is forbidden in Islam and Judaism, so I wouldn’t do it.
Opinion
7Opinion
Yes you do... If you wanted sex with your husband bad enough then you would. I caught my parents by accident in the garage at younger age !!!
Hmmm, you don't know what to do...🤔 Ask your husband for advice.
Is this crush only to have physical intimacy?
As for home, is it just schedules or you just don't find each other sensual enough? When you really feel it, you can always find the time.
Stop the conflicting schedules and go seduce your husband.
you should change your working place. this is not going to end well otherwise. Especially because you are asking this question
Tell your husband about it so he knows and call in sick one day from work and have fun with your husband. Spice it up:)
You already know what to do. You don't need permission from any of us or seek validation to what you already know. When you got married you took vows as did he
What do you want to do?
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