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if you're young with very high sex drive then yes it would be important to stay in shape. But if you are in your 40s complaining about your partner losing their looks, you might want to re-evaluate the decision of why you married your spouse in the first place.
there's no such thing as your husband or wife who will look hot forever. At some point , they will gain weight especially after childbirth or grow wrinkles or lose their hair. Its a natural part of life. You can't just look to divorce whenever your spouse starts looking old or gain weight. Everyone will lose their looks at some point in life. If looks matter so much to you then don't get married.
People gain weight as they get older. Its a natural part of aging. It becomes harder and harder to maintain the same weight in your 20s by the time you hit 45. Having multiple children, stress of raising children, metabolism slows as you get older. You might not even have the time to workout as frequently as you like. If your spouse cannot stay with you if you've gained 20 pounds, you might want to rethink your marriage.
I believe a couple should have mutual levels of fitness and health. Say one of you goes down or let's yourself go while the other stays in shape. How many people can truly say they will be okay with the massive shift of fitness or health?
Granted marriage says to support each other in sickness in health, do the couple mean support their unhealthy lifestyle and desire to embrace that new one ornahould they encourage them to be healthy not just for themselves, but for their family and obligations as well?
I will be real, I would support my wife if she gained weight from pregnancy and was dealing with issues of it afterwards and trying to lose it after she has recovered, but if she let herself go and I stayed in shape I would honestly feel a little resentful.
If we are supposed to take care of each other and be able to do things together, how much does a change like that affect things? If you give up on taking care of yourself, what else will go with that? Relationship investment? Duties around the house and work? It all starts at mental and physical health. You lose that, it starts the downward spiral.
For my entire life I have prided myself about staying in shape. I was a competitive athlete until I was 32 and I still worked out every day afterwards. It was something I had direct control over to make myself more attractive. It also improved my self confidence and exercise is good for mental health.
But from my observations women mostly don’t care that much. They are more attracted to a 6’ 3’’ average bodied guy (not overweight but non athletic) vs a 5’ 10’’ guy who is cut and ripped but you can’t notice easily when they are fully clothed.
For me it was always a pleasant surprise for women when we got intimidate and I got my clothes off. They had no idea I have a ripped chest and abs (also been told I have a perfect butt by girls) until I take my clothing off.
However I am not going to run around shirtless. Especially at my age. However women who have nice athletic bodies even older ones get less (of any) “creep” judgment for showing of their bodies though.
I would have to say that if those were the "terms and conditions" (for a lack of better words) agreed upon at the beginning of the relationship then yes absolutely you should stay fit for your partner.
If the main reason that you are with your partner is because of their good physical health and that's important to you.. so long as you made that clear at the beginning of the relationship then sure you can totally hold them to that..
If you have never worked out with your partner before or spoken about how important to you it is that you and your partner are both in perfect health then no it is not okay for you to expect your partner to stay in shape for you.
But keep in mind that those circumstances of the weight gain or even the weight loss is also important and if it has anything to do with depression then your partner is going to expect you to be supportive of them and understanding.
There's a huge difference between encouraging your partner because you believe in them, and motivating your partner because you have a goal in mind...
I think men have to do it, not women. Women should be excused, and men must man up and stay in shape. A fat guy is gross for a woman to look at.
Can I be honest? It sounds to me like you lack self confidence and possibly have security issues too. .. do men find women who are out of shape attractive? Or do you know that most men don't so an overweight woman is less likely to leave you for someone else? .. in successful relationships the levels of energy match, an unhealthy woman isn't going to want a healthy man because she won't be able to keep up with him and vice versa. (Usually Unless there's mallace intent). If you work out and keep in shape but she doesn't, then when will you spend time together and what will you do? What will you have in common? What kind of meaningful conversations would you have about goals and dreams and the future together? How will you reassure her you won't leave for a healthy woman? (Without having to say it every single day)
I'm not saying it's impossible, I'm saying it makes it more work and not many -if any- people are willing to put in the work for a successful relationship anymore.. and why would they? There's a different option every where you turn, between FB, instagram, twitter all the dating apps and all the other social platforms you could date someone knew every week for the rest of your life and still never get through all of the options.
If you value health, don't you want to be with someone who also values health?
Being "sexy" is subjective.. I don't work out per-say. My job keeps me in really good shape and honestly I like a man with a little gut.. for me, intelligence is a turn on, not looks. I'm a true sapiosexual so looks are secondary. You want to intrigue me? Impress me with your knowledge. You want to seduce me? Let's talk about life's experiences that changed our perspective. You want to get me hooked? Talk to me all night long.
If we can have a meaningful conversation and I learn new things, I don't care what you look like.
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Oh yeah. And even going beyond relationships, I would honestly argue that fitness is next to godliness. If you think about everything that good personal, mental, and spiritual hygiene entails; taking care of your physical fitness is an essential piece of that. And if you're into new-age spiritual stuff like I am; your fitness becomes a reflection of those other parts of your life being aligned.
Why would you ever want to expose someone you love to anything less than the best version of yourself that you could give?
Yes but to the degree that the other person finds attractive. Most people want their partner to be fit but not muscular but there's some people who prefer other bodies. I think both people should try their best to be attractive to their partner.
In terms of staying healthy and avoid habits snd practices that can cause illmesses or weight issues, yes one should feel responsible towards the other and also towards the kids. Illnesse create a burden on the others and the older you get the worse it will get.
Now as far as being in that "attractive/hot/beach body" kind of shape is concerned, i am not sure if "responsibilty" is the right term. But i disagree with that notion of denial that "so what... He/she married me for who i am and for etenity... Why should it matter that i am getting out of shape".
Trust me, as a man, IT WILL have impact on your feelings. You can be all that politically correct and tey to sound like a genuine good at heart person, but all that takes a lot of "giving false impresions" dor the sake of maintaining a "married happy" life. Women are wired a bit different. They are able to make a much stronger emotional connection regardless of visuals.
Please forgive my typos. I find it imposible to type on a cell phone and because of the frustration of having to correct a sentence 5 times, I have given up correcting errors. Otherwise I will simply go mute on all means of cellular communication.
I think it depends on the relationship. If physical fitness is a moral value because you don't want to be a burden on the society around you and family more than necessary, then you could argue that if you go into a relationship with the deal that you will hold each other accountable to your goals, then okay, yeah, you need to meet the commitment you've made. But if you're busy with work and kids and education, and your fitness fluctuates a bit, that shouldn't be someone your significant other piles on about.
Somewhat -- but the fact is that if a guy is in any way traditional he's providing 100 more things to the relationship than she is. So it's not unreasonable for him to have a requirement like she not start looking like Lizzo or melted butter. It's not actually asking that much, even if many fools will accept the feminist angle that men & women are the same, and if she asks for 1 thing it's balanced out by the fact he was only giving 1 thing to begin with.
But let's say you're in a relationship where the guy is only giving very little... that's different. And this is probably the typical early stage dating relationship or even long term relationship where people are renting a little hole somewhere. Little responsibility/obligation or investment in anything is a theme.
I say yes. Maybe it sounds selfish, I don't know. I just think of how you met the person and they suddenly change how they look or behave once you're in a relationship and get rid of what attracted you to them in the first place. I'm superficial for this, sorry. I don't think we should stop trying once we are in a relationship. We should work harder than before to keep it.
When I say no, that means that if one want to get in physical shape, it has to be for one's well being, for oneself, not depend on what others might think, not even on your close ones. Of course, that doesn't mean shunning from your relationships.
The same applies with other activities, as long as they are not unhealthy nor toxic ones, such as learning a language, going abroad, cooking, cleaning, dancing, etc. all those activities which can make you grow up and develop.
You can't always do that after you have a baby. And when you do have kids, it is hard to find the time to exercise, especially when your child is less than a year old. I also think it is the rich that it is the rich who have the time to hit the gym.
It’s entirely up to everyone on what motivates them to get/stay in shape.
Life is too short to live your life to someone else’s standards. Seriously if you don’t workout, power to ya. If you go to the gym, power to ya. As long as they live their happiest life then that’s all that really matters. Mental health matters. Don’t depend on validation of others to keep you healthy because being mentally fit is just as important as being physically fit.
I think you at the minimum have to not let yourself go and you have to be in good shape. That doesn't mean blazing muscles or one piece waist proportions, but you shouldn't be super unhealthy and let yourself go once you get into a relationship
If the women gets pregnant she's gonna gain weight. however, people gain weight for all types of reasons and they should know their partner probably won't be as attracted to them usually. I actually gained weight for my man bc he likes his Women thicker. I can tell he loves my body even more. So there are always exceptions
Gaining weight during pregnancy is healthy and normal. Having a chunky baby is the best baby!
My opinion is that people should maintain a physique that's close to what they had when they got with their partner. It's fine to go better but make an effort to not go worse.
I don’t believe it’s necessarily a responsibility, but it goes to show that your partner does care about their health and are willing to put in the work just like you. If they are not in the same mindset as you, then get someone who does.
You should generally be in a good physical shape. Its healthier and doing every day chores is a lot easier than if you are a 300-pound walrus. This comes from a guy who was at almost 85 kg and is now at 75 kg and I feel a bit better.
Why do you even ask About this crap when you know as well as I do That Getting in shape is A recommended Scientific Fact.
There is no Should you workout
It’s a scientific fact That building muscle Is healthy and everyone should be healthy or suffer the Consequences of being an idiot
I think a man and a woman has an obligation to work at staying healthy. I mean not everyone can look like a supermodel or a professional athlete. But poor diet and lack of exercise WILL catch up to you. It's only a matter of time. And since it's "in sickness an in health" you owe it to your partner to make thier potential burdens less when you can.
Overall yeah. Doesn't mean you have to be in the best possible shape of your life but don't be obese. I understand people may gain some weight throughout a relationship and that's okay but if it goes to the extreme then they should lose the weight.
Not taking care of yourself physically places a burden on your partner. So yes, it is your responsibility to stay in good shape physically to whatever extent is possible.
Everyone has a responsibility to maintain good physical shape and health! Not for others but for one's own-self! Everyone should have a superman mentality, because its best for the world and our own well-being.
I don't know about responsibility per say, but they should want to look good for as Ling as they can for their partner.. I know looks fade, but you can still put effort while it's happening.
For someone else? Hell no
For themselves and their own health? Yes
You should workout for a variety of reasons that’d just be one of many.
health and fitness is important to me but I also workout for the body I want and also to stay keep my appealing.
It depends on the couple. You should never want to keep in physical shape for anyone other than yourself.
Yes, my fat ass is the reason I'm single. I know I need to improve myself before I go placing those expectations on someone else.
You should do that for yourself, not for a partner.
They have the responsibility to get/stay in shape for themselves, for their SO is a bonus
To be honest, you should stay in shape for yourself first. In addition you do it for your significant other.
While looking good and being fit is desirable by the opposite sex, if you're not using what you're constantly trying to maintain, then it's useless.
For their partners attraction? No. To stay healthy and have better feel on life? Yes.
yes, if you are i a relationship with somebody there should be expectations that you will keep yourself healthy
It depends on if both want that responsibility of getting into physical shape. I know I exercise everyday but don't over do it and wouldn't force anyone if they didn't want to.
For your own health is the ultimate goal. For your partner is being sexy hehe. Well it is in my eyes 😊
Yes, I've got a few obese aunt and uncles. Their health is bad because they're overweight. I want a mate who is in good health so we can spend our lives together
Love makes it possible. Wanting to look and feel better to your other half
It would be nice because I don't wanna be fat..
Yeah it's their responsibility to be healthy in general. Some do it for themselves and some do it even if they don't like doing it.
They should do it for themselves. Someone liking you for being fit and healthy that should be a bonus
Thanks for like!
Responsibility towards self
I think women can get away with "letting themselves go" a little bit more then a man can.
Yes, unless health conditions arise or effects of pregnancy. In that case it is excusable and temporary
The Lady of my House has me on a pretty conscious diet and workout regimen for exactly that reason... Can't be getting unhealthy.
Yes and no. Being in shape is infinitely better for one's health than not being in shape but a person should also have motivations apart from their partner.
You don't stay in shape for no one else than yourself. Been in shape is a life style.
Staying in shape is sexy for those that are atracted to the looks.
Yes if i got with you when you were fit you gotta stay fit when it is physically possible.
Yeah I think so, I have always kept my body in tip top shape for the ladies.
I stay in shape for myself not someone else.
Both! For themselves and each other. What great way to encourage eachother. Everyones body should be a priority period
Depends entirely on the couple.
only to themselves
Yes, I do!
Sure, but its more fun if its mutual.
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