If person who loves you wants you to lose weight would you like him/she to tell you? And would you like to try to lose weight for him/she?

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

I already want to lose weight myself - have wanted to most of my life.
If I had a partner that felt that way just with the thought if their boner, then I couldn't be with them.

If they just wanted me to be healthy for my own benefit, and wanted to help keep me motivated and/or help, then that would make me more likely to fight harder.

But right now I want to work out more to get those endorphins, to get more control over my body, to feel good in my skin, to be strong - and to fight this medical thing that apparently runs in my family- osteoporosis.

So honestly, if he just wants me to be hot, then he's not someone I would want to date.


Oh, also, I don't just want to lose weight and be skinny. I want to build muscles and become strong, lift heavy.

[jennifer_bloom]

I don't mind losing weight if the guy puts in effort too - such as doing house work or earning money. If he wants to contribute nothing and expects me to lose weight, I will eat chips in front of him just to annoy him.

[Anonymous]

I probably wouldn't like hearing it, but in the interest of honest communication, yeah, I would like to be told if my girlfriend/wife wanted me to lose weight. I'd like to think I would try, but if we're being honest, I don't know if I actually could. I lost 40 pounds during the pandemic when I was unemployed, but now that I have a job I've gained 10 pounds this year. I think I'd be too tired to keep working out and after a month or so of dieting and exercising, I'd probably just get annoyed with the whole thing.

[ManOnFire]

Well, I am different about this topic. If the person I'm into was already trying to lose weight I wouldn't have a problem with it. But if I felt like the person was too big for me, I wouldn't be dating them in the first place, and dating them but expecting them to lose weight wouldn't really be fair to them. I don't believe in trying to get your lover to change themselves unless they're already trying to.

[Guy13]

Yes and I would try to make it an effort for 2. This shows that one is serious about their request.

[Xoxocutekitty]

Totally understandable if we've been together a while (years) and I've put on enough weight that it's disrupting his attraction/ my ability to feel sexy in the relationship.

I would however discount having a baby from this equation because giving birth is hard enough, no one needs opinions about your body afterwards. Sure if she can't get the weight off in 2 years it's probably her, not the baby, but it's unrealistic to 'bounce back' in 6 months, especially if you're breast feeding or having multiple pregnancies (getting pregnant within a year of giving birth also).

[iiinsOMNIA]

I'm already trying to lose weight, so I guess it depends on if they're trying to encourage me or just want me to lose weight because that's what they want.

If it's solely just because they want me to, I'd be kind of sad, but I wouldn't say anything and probably just keep doing my normal routine. If they have a real issue with my weight that's on them.

[DermalPunch]

Yes, please do. Tell me if I am fat or getting fat. I think that barring health issues, carrying a child (and even here there are limits) or some other extenuating circumstance, partners should strive to be in the best physical shape they can for one another.

You expect me to stay with you until you die and you want to abuse your body then I have to care for an invalid with a whole host of health issues. No thanks.

[art84]

I wouldn't do it for the person but for my own health. I gained weight during the pandemic like 30 pounds. I lost 20 pounds and it took 14 weeks and 6 months and get my stomach flat. Now I have gained 20 pounds from 177 to 184. It's just hard to get my ideal weight of 150-160 pounds when something always comes up and I can't find the time. Now if my partner that loves wanted to join in losing it with me as a support then I would welcome it.

[Anonymous]

That depends, when did they decide this? I mean if we've been together a bit and I put on weight that's one thing. But if we just met and she's saying, "oh by the way if you could lose some weight that'd be great". My response is, "you can kindly f*** off now". 🤣

[TheSpaceGnome]

That would depend on what weight I was at the time.

If overweight? sure, but I'd already be trying to lose that if I was, if a healthy weight or underweight? no, but i wouldn't take offense to it.

[inhua]

the sooner they tell me, the better it is.

it is not fatphobic to tell someone to lose weight. when it comes to health, getting emotional is not the way to respond.

[ClosetHoe]

I think it shows that he cares about my health. As long as he isn’t trying make me an unrealistic standard of beauty I’ll definitely take his suggestion into consideration.

[ArtemisSilver]

Sure, they can cook with me, count calories, join me at the gym and walk the walk too if they "love" me.

Just telling someone hey you should lose weight and then feeling like you've done your good deed for the day isn't worth shit.

[Aerissa_Jade]

I'm on a perpetual diet to try and lose weight, don't need someone to request it. However maybe we could work out together as partners.

[USLegionary]

It's actually a good partner that would tell you and try to help you. Most would cheat or leave you

[Anonymous]

Yes I would. I completely agree that attraction is important in a relationship and that couples shouldn't just let themselves go once they're married/super committed long term. And, TBH, losing weight is important for health reasons anyways.

[BigschlongEnergy]

If someone claimed to Love me and wanted me to Lose Weight I would call that person delusional and Cut them out of my Life.

[Phoenix98]

I only weigh like 155-160lbs with almost single digit body fat going below that would actually be quite unhealthy so I’d have to pass on that.

[Anonymous]

It needs to come from the heart and not vanity. I can forgive a lot if they are saying things for the right reason.
I'm not averse to losing weight in any case, I'm just not very motivated and not very fat.

[LazerBean]

Yes, we look out for eachother and that includes health things.

[TacosRAwesome]

Yes. But they need to be supportive about it. Ie. We will now eat healthy, figure out a way to increase exercise etc.

[AngelLily]

If it was for Health Reasons then definitely tell me.

[DrBanana]

I would recommend due to health reasons and such but you can’t force people.


They will subconsciously dig in their heels I find.

[Babygirl_S]

Certainly! Whenever I get fat (likely to happen after childbirth) I will do everything I can to lose weight.

[Crankor]

Nothing wrong with showing you can take care of yourself. It's possible that person it concered about losing a degree of sexual attraction as well.

[genericname85]

Yes to both. I wanna be attractive for my partner and i hope she will do the same for me too.

[Guanfei]

That would be the only motivation that would work for me

[OlderAndWiser]

I am doing that now.

[Nikki1989]

Yes, I want them to be happy with me.

[boggboss]

Yes and yes I dont think it's a malicious request

[Nominal]

No, i wouldn't let...