What's the point of jealousy (I find it stupid and toxic) in a relationship?

[Anonymous]

For instance I got dumped because he wanted to see other people.

My reply as I'm opening the door (my house): The door is open. Don't stay there for too long though. Otherwise you would be blocking the traffic.''

He was shocked that there was no jealousy tone in me, at how I can be calm. He kept bringing back the stereotype that we (you probably know which ethnicity I'm referring to and no not all of us are like that) can be feisty, jealous, somewhat crazy and very loud. My reply: ''Ok bye, the door is open now. Like stated, you're blocking the traffic right now''. Then he left.

I'm still wondering what's the point of being jealous and crazy? I find that a terrible trait.

Updates

+1 y

Why would I try to chase someone that doesn't want me? It makes no sense. Or those that keep saying ''that man/woman stole him/her from me''. Nope, no one stole anyone. They want on their own because they wanted to.

[Anonymous]

His ego was clearly wounded, he expected you to beg, cry and whatever else but I’m glad to hear he got that reality check. As for your question, I’m not sure if jealousy is what I think of in these situations but an ability (or inability) for someone to see their worth. A lot of time men are good at maintaining their boundaries and standards because they know their value, so you’ll notice they’ll be firm on their decision and not back down. While some women will beg, change, and do whatever to keep him because they value him more than themselves. When those women can be confident in who they are, know they’re worth and realize that they’re also the prize, they can do what you did and be fine letting the man go. I’d never devalue myself by pleading for a man to keep me, or have that “she stole my man” mentality. Whoever can take him away from me can have him lol.

[MrOracle]

You cannot control another person - not their actions and not their feelings. All you can do is set boundaries and expectations and then ENFORCE THEM.

I've broken up with women because they were "unsure how they felt about me" and because they broke boundaries that I set. I was under no illusion that I could control them, but I could control whether or not we continued to be in a relationship.

It's not about jealousy - that's pointless - it's about respect, and about reality. You have to know what you can and cannot do, and not let yourself get emotionally tied up in things you can't control.

[Berethor]

Harder to do if you have children, and jealousy shows that you care, and you don't care.

[Brando10222]

There no point in being jealous at all. It depends on how people see it. I'm happy he's not with you. And one day you will be too.

[Asker]

Yeah, I find jealousy a negative trait in a person with low self-esteem; someone that likely doesn't have any dignity.
It wouldn't make any sense to chase over someone that doesn't want you. I find it absurd that him and others really think we all act like the stereotype just because of our ethnicity instead of realizing we're all different people.

[Brando10222]

I agree with you. Of course we can get hurt cause we like/love that person but doesn't mean we have to get jealous. I don't know why he wants you to be jealous. Cause by saying that it shows he is toxic.