How do I choose a man?

Question

I have three keen on me right now and I haven’t committed to any of them but none of them knows about the others. When it comes time to choose, how do I select one? They’re all in the USA.

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

First, you should only consider men who are LOCAL to you. If they live more than 15 minutes away from you, that's too far. You need someone you can see at least 2-3 times a week on an on-going basis.

Then, you should evaluate their morals, values, and life-goals. If you want your man to come home to you every night, then picking a guy whose career will have him traveling a lot, or being assigned to different cities, isn't going to work for you. And if your man doesn't have good morals and values, how could you possibly expect your relationship to be sustainable?

Most women pick the hot guy, the popular guy, or the rich guy, never considering his morals, values, or life-goals until AFTER she has tried to build a life with him, and it's WAY too late at that point. Of course, that guy being hot or being rich suddenly isn't enough when he cheat, or steals, or defrauds people, or starts/continue being a drunk or using drugs, etc., but that guy was THAT guy from the day you met him. Hot/popular/rich won't sustain a relationship if morals and values aren't there. To go further, many of those guys aren't interested in commitments or anything long-term anyway - but they might lie to get you into bed.

You need to be honest with yourself about what you really want, and you need to be REALISTIC about who you can get, and finally, you need to make sure that YOU are the kind of woman that the men you want would WANT for a long-term relationship. Inevitably, you will have to make some sacrifices - that's ALWAYS true of any relationship - but if you pick a quality man, the sacrifices will be far outweighed by the fact that you have someone who is always going to be there for you, and someone who can help you face the adversities of life together. Remember: a relationship doesn't mean that you will be free of adversity - you'll face adversities regardless - but it's a lot easier to get through those times when you have a partner to help.

SnowedIn · Accepted Answer

When the time comes to choose, which one do you want to wake up next to for the rest of your life. Which one will care for you when you break your leg. Which one are you willing to help with adult diapers when he's 87. The man who's going to nurture your children. The man who will humor your quirks and honor what's important to you. Etc. That's the guy.

TacosRAwesome · Accepted Answer

Do a pros and cons list. If you can have them meet a friend you trust for coffee to see their vibe in social situations.

LiamSawyer · Answer

Which one shares the same values as you, he has to have a good career but not married to his career, do you both want children? Would he be loyal and faithful, does he really love and respect you? Does hebknow how to handle money wisely and save some of it or just blow it all. Those would just be a few things to look for.

BJP21 · Answer

here's a thought. Check their zodiac sign, its a good start.

Jerre · Answer

Get to know them better, talk to them. See if you have common interests

Jennz6 · Answer

Which one is really good in bed?

PatriceONeal · Answer

As soon as any of them find out you talk to multiple guys at once. Prepare to have none.

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