What do you think I should I do?

[Anonymous]

So, I’m the car going home. my twin sister just told me that my boyfriend is pedophile? My sister said that he’s done this to tons of girls and that my sisters friends littler sister has a friend that is in middle school (8th grade) and he talked to her or something. (I’m not sure what he did, my sisters friend just told my sister)

My boyfriend and I are both 17. He’s online school and I am not but I have had him in my school/class freshman or sophomore year. My sister just tells me to block him. But the whole situation is confusing and so shocking to me I don’t know where to go from here.

And he’s asked a few times for pictures of my outfit and asked about sex maybe 2/3 times which my sister says it’s weird because he asked for my outfit a lot. But I thought that this was normal for a boyfriend to do in a relationship.

What do you think I should do? I don’t want to talk to him about it because it’s just kinda awkward.
Options please?

[SnowedIn]

Options: Block him. Talk to him. Do nothing. Break up with him. Some hybrid of those.

I can't tell you which I think you should choose. But, here are a couple things to think about.

First, I doubt he's a pedophile. That word is WAY overused. It's actually a very specific word for an adult or older adolescent (which would include your boyfriend) who has a primary or exclusive sexual attraction to pre-pubescent children (which I doubt is him). So, while someone in 8th grade might have huge ewwwwwww factor, it's not pre-pubescent and it's not pedophilia. That's important.

Second, and really important, while I don't want to discount what your sister says, this is like sixth hand information you have. This is not an eyewitness account. So, again, trust your sister but at the same time, how good is the information she has?

Third (connected to second) you have no idea of what any of this is. I'm not gaslighting, I'm not throwing shade at your sister or her friends, I'm just saying you don't have enough information to go on.

Which brings us back to your options.

Blocking him right off is shitty. What if he hasn't done something and these are crappy rumors? Doing nothing seems a little extreme on the other end. My advice is to do one of two things: either get real information from real people first hand. Or, talk to your boyfriend. See what he says.

The reason I'm suggesting a cautious approach is this sounds a lot like a similar situation where people will talk about a girl and say she's a slut and that unfounded rumor makes its way back to her boyfriend and she gets dumped. Again, I'm not discounting anybody but suggesting that a thoughtful, informed approach is best.

[SnowedIn]

Thank you for MHO!

[Anonymous]

You need to be able to talk to him. This will not be the first uncomfortable topic you bring up but it doesn’t mean you avoid the conversation altogether. I’m not sure how credible that story can be with so many middle men, and who knows when this happened if it even did. But no matter what it’s a very serious topic and should be addressed with him.