My boyfriend lied to me about something small. Do you think small lies should be ignored in a relationship?

Question

He lied to me and then confessed it. But that still doesn't change the fact that he lied to me. It is just a small lie, but does that mean he can tell bigger lies in the future? Do you think small lies should be ignored in a relationship?

Screenwriter · Accepted Answer

I think it has to be weighed. Did he lie about buying the wrong dog food? Or about drinking with the boys when he said he was riding his bike. One is an embarrassing, foolish lie. The other is a lie that is hiding something.

I think this has to do with the matter. People lie all the time. Most lies are inconsequential. They mask issues that aren't the other person's business.

You say you have an appointment, but you're having lunch with a friend the particular person you're talking to doesn't like.

Omission is a form of lying. I was at my cousin's house while he was talking to his wife at the doctor's office. I could hear her ask him what he was doing. He said, "nothing" when we had been having a lively conversation and planting some tilled soil on our family property. I kept quiet and didn't indicate I was there because I could tell he didn't want me to. After the call we went about our mutual business with each other.

There are these kinds of events all the time. If he's lying to keep IMPORTANT things from you, that's one thing. The wrong dog food or the his cousin visiting are not.

MysticAngel5000 · Accepted Answer

Well, why did he lie? What was the lie pertaining to?

In my opinion, no, little lies shouldn't be ignored. If it's a one time thing and he admits to it, apologizes and doesn't do it again, then ok. But, most of the time, they will do it again. One little lie turns into another. Then another. Then another. Then they start lying about bigger things.

Honesty is ALWAYS the best policy. I always tell my partners to be honest with me no matter what. Even if I am going to be angry or saddened by the truth, do not lie. Just be honest and tell me what's going on. I would much rather be hurt or angered by the truth than a lie. It will only hurt more to find out you weren't honest with me.

I would have a discussion with him about this. Let him know that you appreciate him being honest about being dishonest, but from now on, he needs to be honest with you and not lie anymore. You deserve the truth and you deserve respect.

Good luck! I hope he does not continue to be dishonest with you.

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

A lot of women SAY that the want the truth, but many of them can't handle the truth. Men tend to be realistic and practical (for sure, there are exceptions!), while women tend to live in their own fantasies a lot of the time, and they resent having the fantasy ruined by reality. Men learn this, usually the hard way, and learn that the only way to keep most women happy is to tell them lies - mostly little ones.

You would know if he was telling you big lies about important things. Women are good at that - your Spidey sense gets triggered. It doesn't sound like that's the case here.

AviatorTom · Accepted Answer

It's important to understand why he lied. If he was trying to protect you, or thought it was about something that wouldn't interest you, then it's no big deal. If he was intentionally trying to hide somethign from you that he knew was important for you, that's not good.

People don't always tell the truth. Sit down with him and find out why he lied, and then decide how you feel about it.

Finchie40 · Answer

I guess it depends on what the small lie was about and how much it effected you? Even though lying is not good , most people do it because they don’t want to stir up unnecessary drama if it’s something they feel isn’t that big of a deal but to others it can be so they make up a little lie just so don’t have to deal with the outcome of it , Yes it’s bad to lie to your partner period but most people have a hard time being honest and sadly that’s one of the reason most relationships don’t survive because people have a hard time being honest with each other. So you aren’t wrong for being upset if his lie effected you , so it’s up to you on how you want to handle it , The fact that he did confess the truth to you is a good sign that he realized he was wrong for lying to you I. The first place but for you to regain his trust again he is going to have to start being honest with you or that relationship won’t survive

Vázquez613 · Answer

When it comes to small lies in a relationship, it really depends on the situation and how you both feel about it. Some people might be okay with letting small lies slide, while others think it's important to address them. You should think about the context of the lie and why your boyfriend lied in the first place. Talk it out. That way, you can both work together to figure out the best way to handle things and maintain trust in your relationship.

ArrowheadSW · Answer

A lady who I know said that she was going somewhere with her boyfriend, and he got a call on his cell phone and he told the guy who called that he was heading to his grandmother's house. They were not going to his grandmother's house. She thought that it was so odd that he would lie about something like that, and I agreed.

It makes you wonder, if they make up stuff like that, what else are they making up?

What was it that your boyfriend lied about? Just curious.

ChillaxingLove · Answer

That’s how criminals become criminals. They start off with the small stuff, before you know it they’re robbing banks. Small lies turn into bigger lies as they get used to lying. I’m not saying put him on trail for telling you there is no food left in the refrigerator, but make your feelings known so it’s clear you don’t like being lied to.

JDAC092299 · Answer

Usually when men tell small lie’s it’s because there’s a communication issue somewhere in the relationship about something he didn’t feel he could be honest to you about a lot of the time this is out of fear of a certain reaction, holding his hands up to the lie shows he didn’t really wanna lie to you in my opinion and I know it doesn’t make it right but it’s probably not any bigger than the one incident itself

KAYJJAY · Answer

I do not think that it should be ignored but I applaud him for telling you that he did. Was it something like where he was going? or who he was with? I think that yes it does mean that he can tell bigger lies in the future but also so can everyone. I would talk to him about it

smilelots · Answer

in my opinion we should never lie to anyone let alone someone we say we love and care for.. it makes no sense to lie.. then you never know if there telling the truth I told my boys this at a young age , always tell the truth have integrity they can't take that from you only you can do that.. be honest or whats the point.

melanieeeB · Answer

Well if you yourself considerate it to be small and nothing much, i wouldn't overthink it.
You can sure have a conversation and say your fears and that you don't tolerate it but yeah I personally wouldn't overthink it

BrookeAZ90 · Answer

If they're lying about something that is small and unimportant, you can be willing to bet they'll lie about bigger things that actually matter. No lies, of any size should be ignored.

OfMiceandMen · Answer

I would not read too much into it. I am sure if you look back you told some minor fibs, so you can't be too judgmental.

mommymommy · Answer

If he does something to try to get away with it (like lying), then he's likely going to keep doing it. He's already broken your trust. You now need to decide if you're willing to keep trying to believe him or not

slatyb · Answer

I think you should find out why he felt compelled to lie about it. Is he embarrassed? Did he fear that you would react badly?

Shamalien · Answer

People lie about small things all the time I wouldn’t sweat it. Like do you wanna hear him tell you he hates your favourite movie? Does it matter?

serious_miss419 · Answer

Here is a perspective: if someone hurts you only a little bit all of the time, does it make it okay and less mean? It depends how much you are willing to put up with.

Anonymous · Answer

It really depends on the intent. I mean women lie so much that if you didn't ignore most of the lies you simply couldn't have a relationship. Most guys just accept this fact about women. But it's intent behind the lie that matters.

NostalgiaSenpi · Answer

Nope. I'd start to look at everything they said or did for the rest of the time.

Anonymous · Answer

No small lies should never be ignored because they only lead to bigger lies.

noohair · Answer

Everyone lived 3 lives, A public life, A Private life and, A secret life.

Anonymous · Answer

White lies dont really bother me

007kingifrit · Answer

everyone lies probably let it go

In_Trance · Answer

Depends what the lie was

Anonymous · Answer

Every fraud begin with small moves...

Anonymous · Answer

lied about something small 🤔...😯

My boyfriend lied to me about something small. Do you think small lies should be ignored in a relationship?

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What Girls & Guys Said

Honestly speaking, how do you expect your boyfriend to be okay with you if you lied more than once over little things?

My boyfriend lied to me about something small. Do you think small lies should be ignored in a relationship?

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What Girls & Guys Said

Honestly speaking, how do you expect your boyfriend to be okay with you if you lied more than once over little things?

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