Is it offensive if I force my partner to take a STD test?

[Anonymous]

I am 5 months pregnant and you get tested for STDS, I was negative at the early stages but recently me and my baby dad have been on rough patches and he’s been going out a lot so I’m VERY paranoid he might have caught something. i am a big health anxiety and im not risking the health of my baby Incase he’s slept with some random woman while he’s been on holiday. Is it rude if I just order a test kit to him from my home and he can do it here? I really do not want to play about when it comes to my child and I just don’t trust that he’s Been faithful in holiday. Is it rude if I just order him a kit and say I’m not sleeping with you until you show me you’re negative.

[Anonymous]

It's understandable that you are concerned about your health and the health of your unborn child, but it's important to approach the situation with your partner in a respectful and non-confrontational manner.

Rather than forcing your partner to take a test, consider having an open and honest conversation with him about your concerns. Express your feelings and concerns in a calm and respectful manner, and be prepared to listen to his perspective as well.

It's important to remember that testing for STIs should be a mutual decision made between both partners. While it's important to prioritize your health and the health of your unborn child, it's also important to respect your partner's autonomy and privacy.

Consider offering to take a test together or to seek the help of a healthcare professional to address any concerns or questions you may have. Remember that communication and mutual respect are key in any relationship, and that open and honest communication can help build trust and understanding between you and your partner.

[OlderAndWiser]

If you don't trust him, why do you continue to have sex with him? You can't control him; can you control yourself?

[Asker]

Because at the start he seemed trustworthy but recently he keeps saying things like ‘I can do what I want when I want and you can’t stop me’ so it’s making me think if he’s sleeping around because I don’t understand that

[OlderAndWiser]

So why are you still having sex with him now?

[TrueConfection]

I was going to say it's rude, but not if he's been out puttsing around on holiday. I think it's better to get him to stop the behavior first. If he doesn't stop, will you ask for a test every time?

[Asker]

Well he doesn't usually go out much it was just this bank holiday weekend he went away and I have no idea what he was up to plus we were on bad terms. I think I would feel very unsafe if he keeps going out and I’d want to ask everytime

[Apple1996]

It's for the safety of the baby so yes he needs to get tested

[Kabluie]

It's a fair ask, because if you are asking for an STI test that means he hadn't been tested recently and it's good to know and can preface for the safety of the baby while having unprotected sex. The mail order ones are good because he can swab and finger prick on his own time and just send it out.

[Leapfrog00]

It shouldn't be. Some people take offense to everything though. Some STDS people can get it without even having sex, so just tell him you'd feel safer if he had a test done because it's easy to contract an STD.

[DizzyDesii]

Nope if he reeeally wants sex, he’ll get tested whenever

[sheikalana]

Not offensive but you cannot force him either.

[SirJohn42]

Nothing wrong for asking him to do it. Nor doing it for your unborn child.

Just tell him your concern. Hopefully he will be a man to do it.

[Greenbins]

It is very offensive to him to do that..

[Asker]

Is it though? I’ve been told by my midwife that if you’re having unprotected sex and someone has chlamidiya the baby can be born blind and if he’s going out and not getting tested it’s risky to our child

[Greenbins]

You are assuming he is doing something wrong i. Instead of having an adult conversation with him you are jumping to conclusions...
Trying talking before you jump to conclusions

[Asker]

I don’t want to accuse him but he’s told me he hasn’t been tested since he met me 6 months ago so I don’t know if he could hahe sormtjing from someone before

[Luckycharms12]

A little and no all at the same time

[brandon1122]

It's for safety so go for it

[Agape93]

Nope

[In_Trance]

i think so

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆