Is it wrong to distance yourself from a friend of the opposite gender when they get into a relationship?

[Anonymous]

I don't have feelings for her, I'm actually interested in another woman, but it feels very strange to spend time with her even if we're around other friends.

Yes

No

[Flatmanlewis]

I had a few close female friends in my single days. One was a friends with benefits and the other more like a sister. As we dated other people we always necessarily took a step back and it was both well understood and never a source of friction. We each accepted that it was not respectful to whomever we were spending time with to be out drinking together until 2:00, taking trips together, or staying overnight at each others place. Sadly, those friendships didn’t last as we each got into long term committed relationships and even though I wish they had I also understand why they didn’t.

[OlderAndWiser]

It is not wrong to respond to your own feelings but I don't know why you would feel strange about spending time with a friend of the opposite sex.

[Brittanykeen88]

Sounds like you figure out what all men need to figure out good for you. You're not wrong and absolutely did the right thing. I personally had issues in past relationships where my guy wasn't setting healthy boundaries with friends of the opposite sex.

[Billlewis]

Yes, ma'am, I just started following you and I'd be honored if you'd like to follow me as well. Thank you very much.

[RoseySarah]

Not really they usually do that themselves being in a relationship not around the opposite sex.

That or they flirt with every girl they see cause of the new confidence.

[kylee2437]

Doesn’t sound like much of a friendship if it boils down to her having to be single for you two to continue to be just friends. I understand where you are coming from but there’s truth around it

[FunkyMonkee]

No! That's utterly stupid!!
"I have a boyfriend now so, I can't talk to you anymore."
"But, we've been best friends since we were babies!"
"Sorry, I can't talk to you anymore!"

Why would you WANT to be with someone that FORCED YOU to give up your friends? That, right there, PROVES to you that they flat out don't trust you!! What are they gonna do, see to it you have NO contact AT ALL with people of the opposite sex? How fucking ridiculous!! If your relation ISN'T built on 100% trust, then, it WILL fail!! What if she's bi, are you gonna make her stop talking to all her female friends, too?

[Meropatrick]

Thats actually very "jerkish" i can say. My friend isn't a man or a woman they r just my friend. Whether u get married or travelled to the moon u never leave ur friend or distance urself for them. And why do u feel awkward around her? Is she acting out of normal? i really feel sorry for ur friend as i have been in her place. And some people when they get into relationship they suddenly act like they r above everyone else and leave their friends behind. It happened to me and it hurts.

[Anonymous]

I've never really understood this. Of course it's okay to allow her and her new partner some time to themselves, but cutting her off completely kind of seems like you weren't truly friends in the first place. If you're both platonic there shouldn't be an issue, unless one of you simply isn't mature enough to be friends with the opposite sex while in a relationship. Unfortunately a ton of people are just untrusting. I'm not blaming you specifically, but everyone who has trust issues regarding opposite sex friendships has either been hurt in the past by a cheater, or is simply immature. It boggles my mind how common this is. I say this as someone with a female best friend whom I hold zero romantic interest in.

[sunflower00]

I agree with this

[nastyb]

I think cutting someone off completely is a bit cold hearted. Its good to pop in send a message on facebook just to check up on her. It shows you still care about your friend. I remember a time when a best friend of mine met her boyfriend, she forgot about me and took advantage of me before our friendship ended. It was one of the biggest betrayals ever. Friendship is cheap nowadays. Once they find someone better, they forget about you.

[Radiate143]

A good friend of mine who really really is like a big brother to me got married. He is a really mature guy so, while I know he would have at least hooked up with me, he never crossed that line or even hinted at it. So now that he is married, I only call him if I really need some help and I just pass him holiday wishes and stuff. Or some little advice here and there.

[Rei02]

I don't think so. Just put healthy boundaries, and keep in mind your true feelings. If you feel an attraction is starting, no matter from which side, then stay away.

[Married_mature]

Not really. You can still be friends with someone who's in a relationship. My best friend is married, but that has changed nothing between us

[wiltingrosepetal]

It makes perfect sense, and honestly shows a bit of respect for the couple

[Nikki1989]

Yes, it is wrong. Friends don't do that to other friends.

[blissinanarchy1]

Actually man, it's respect. Good for you, not stepping on toes.

[Quigly]

Not at all, it's a smart move. People in Relationships tend to have a lot of drama and try to blame others for their problems. It's best to keep a distance.

[Anonymous]

Lets see s/he needs to bind with their new partner who also doesn't need to feel threatened by you. So i guess its reasonable and nice.

[DextroShade]

You shouldn't have female friends because it is a massive L for you.

[PreciousJewel]

Depends, it's respectful if you were flirty. But if you weren't, I don't see the need.

[Beth1977]

I would say no but I have a friend or used to be friend that when she would get into a relationship she would stop talking to me.

[Chthou95]

That's the best option. Move on completely though and focus on other things

[serious]

No, that is the right thing to do

[cnj421]

Can’t you all be friends?

[sheikalana]

It’s the right thing to do.

[Anonymous]

*Opposite sex.

[Jmmmfi4]

ID DO THE SAME

[Joker_]

not wrong