Guy friend initiates video calls and ask how I am every week?

[Ofoceansbeaches]

But he seems to purposely just ring once for the video call such that im not able to answer it and when i call him, he doesn't answer lol. He mentioned in the past he is avoidant and he also said he gaslights me. I'm not sure if he is playing games but it seems he purposely delays messages and rings then not answer when i ring back.

Is his being avoidant also present in friendships? He did say I am special to him and he is really emotionally connected to me when in person. He even shows emotions like cries infront of me

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm that does seem a bit strange how he initiates calls but then doesn't actually talk when you try to call back. Some thoughts:

- His avoidant behavior may stem from fear of intimacy/commitment, even in friendships. Wanting closeness but also distancing at times.

- It's possible he has romantic feelings for you but is worried to express them clearly due to past experiences. So he sends mixed signals instead.

- Gaslighting is never okay. But avoidants sometimes aren't even aware they're doing it by making you question your perceptions.

- Crying and saying you're special could indicate real emotional connection, even if he pulls away in moments. Emotions are confusing!

If you value his friendship overall, I'd gently talk to him about this calling pattern when you do connect. Use "I feel" statements, not accusations. Make sure to set clear boundaries too if it bothers you. An honest conversation could help you both understand where you both stand. Communication is so important!

[BIZARRE_TRUTH]

Yes if it happens more than once, or isn't immediately fixed by valling you back, then absolutely he's doing it purpose. AVOID THIS MAN

[dustybiker2]

Sounds wishy-washy. Who has time for that? Let him waste someone else's time.

[Nikki1989]

That is an instant dealbreaker.