Am I asking for too much?

[heybay22]

He would come over every day and sex was great and he was always so nice and kind however 8 months later

He spends time with me most weekdays but all we do is sit and do work. He’s doing a masters program and I’m in undergrad (same subject) but that’s really all we do.

I’ve told him I feel a little distant only for him to say he’s with me all the time and I apologized. He was a bit annoyed or gets mad.

He seems to go out with friends weekends and our wine nights kind of stopped. I also don’t really know his friends (only met them 2-3 times) and I’ve asked if I could go and he’s said no because he just wanted to keep them all separated and that he didn’t want to be taking care of me and just relax. He told me once that he mixed his friends and ex girlfriend before and the girl kinda took the friends and now he wants to keep everything separated.

I’ve just been feeling super anxious and sad in the relationship. I feel too needy and stressed out. And almost like I wait for him to make a plan and I’m there.

We had sex once or twice a week before but recently it’s stopped. He says he’s stressed out.

He also kinda stopped coming over saying he’s just stressed and needs to focus.

Should I let him be or break up with him?

I’ve addressed how I felt and he even decided to take me some place nice but that day it was closed and he then went out with the friends.

I kind of always ask if I could go and it’s gotten to the point where he got annoyed and says he’s with me weekdays.

So yeah I

Don’t know…

He also mixed up my graduation date and I really just yelled “go with your friends” and I called him and he didn’t call me for four days until he said he scheduled his internship appointment for a different date and then showed up.

He met my family but after I wanted to spend time with him and all he did was work. I cried and he took me on a drive. We came back and he stayed home and we haven’t had sex in a month.

Updates

+1 y

He hasn’t come over in 1 month.

He called me regularly asking me where I am and he updates me on his stuff as well.

I feel like I’m walking on eggshells sometimes and asking for his time

Updates

+1 y

He also says i don’t understand that he’s stressed

[Daniela1982]

What can you expect out of a fuck buddy? Seems to me that is all he was interested in. Can it be that he has met someone new? As you were not in a committed relationship neither of you owe the other anything. I'm surprised you went with this guy for 8 months and didn't have anything in "writing". I'm curious, was it just sex for you or did you catch some feelings?

[heybay22]

We were boyfriend and girlfriend. For the first 5 months he would treat me like a queen. Classes and work got hectic and slowly started putting me aside.

We gave each other gifts and had fun wine nights. I’m actually more sexually active then he is so i don’t think it was for just sex.

[heybay22]

I mean we are in a serious relationship just don’t know what to do

[Daniela1982]

OK, my apologies. Could it be possible he is seeing someone else?

[heybay22]

I have his location lol. He is just at home and he calls often. I pop up sometimes. The only person he is seeing is his work 😂😂.

Anyway…. Does this all sound like a red flag? Like he’s just putting me aside? Or should I wait it out? I do love him. All of this just makes me sad however and unappreciated.

Am I being too needyb

[Daniela1982]

What I think, and what he may think, is that you two need to take a break and let things sort themselves out. Just have no expectations and you won't be disappointed when things go sideways.

[heybay22]

Agreed

[Surely]

I believe that you are experiencing the “Honeymoon is over syndrome!” Time to find another partner to enjoy life with.

[Surely]

Thank you for the MHO!

[dudeinohio]

I'd dump him. He's not ready for a relationship. He has other priorities.

[AI Opinion]

Oh, love, you're not asking for too much at all; you're simply asking the wrong person to give it to you! 🌹 Relationships are a two-way street, filled with compromise, understanding, and mutual effort to meet each other's needs. It sounds like your beau is cruising down a one-way path focused primarily on his needs, leaving you stranded at the intersection of Confused and Unfulfilled.

His insistence on keeping his friends separate and the reduction in quality time, affection, and intimacy are red flags that shouldn’t be ignored. You've already taken the right step by communicating your feelings, but if his actions—or lack thereof—remain unchanged, it's a sign that he may not be as invested in the relationship as you are.

No relationship should leave you feeling anxious, sad, or needy, especially when you've made a sincere effort to address these feelings. Remember, it's crucial to have a partner who will not only listen but also take proactive steps to improve the situation. If he's unable to meet you halfway, then perhaps it's time to consider that this relationship might not be the right fit for you.

You deserve someone who not only ignites the spark but keeps the fire burning, someone who is as excited to share their world with you as you are with them. Don’t settle for the bare minimum when you deserve the stars. 💫

[shortster]

Break up, he isn't putting in the effort to maintain the relationship