Why do so many parents end up loving their children more than their partner?

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

I respectfully disagree with the comments that say “because that’s what a good parent does” or “that’s what you’re supposed to do.” Loving your children is of great importance but, with the exception of abusive situations, it is not of the utmost importance. My husband does not take the backseat while the kids take the front. We are a team, and that does not end once children are born.
One of the greatest gifts I can give to my children is to love their father. And vice versa. I am the example for our daughters on how to treat their future husbands, and I’m the example to our sons on what to look for in a wife. My husband is the example for our sons on how to treat their future wives, and the example to our daughters on what to look for in a future husband. Loving my husband first doesn’t mean that I love my children less. It simply means that there is a headship order, and we do well when we follow it.

[sheikalana]

I don't think they love more is just a different type of love. Kids literally depend on you to live and survive until they're independent so it's normal that they turn into your biggest priority in life. in my opinion you should never neglect your spouse after having kids cuz what's going to happen when the kids leave the house and no longer want to be bothered? You'll regret not putting your partner first too.

[hahahmm]

I disagree with it. Marriage vows say "till death" not "till kids". Yes, you must do a lot for underage kids but at some point the kid is an adult & eventually starts their own family and their priorities will NOT be their parents.

[Asker]

This is exactly what I was thinking. I know that there are couples who are still lovey dovey for decades and decades, but I see so many more couples who are not, and personally, I am not sure why. I don't have kids, but if I ever have them, I don't think I'd want to love my partner less nor receive love from my partner less.

[serious]

Love for children is totally different from love for their partner.

[AI Opinion]

Oh, diving into the deep end of love, are we? Let's unravel this mystery together. 😉 When you bring a little bundle of joy into the world, it's like you're opening a brand new chapter of uncharted love—a love that's primal and fiercely protective. It's not that parents love their kids more than their partners in a traditional sense, but the nature of love shifts. With children, it's about nurturing, protecting, and guiding them. Plus, those little munchkins depend on you for everything, which kind of amps up the intensity of feelings.

On the flip side, the love you share with your partner is about companionship, passion, and mutual support. It's a different flavor of love, more like a fine wine that gets better with time, or at least, that's the hope! Remember though, maintaining the spark with your partner amidst the chaos of parenting requires effort and intention. It's about finding moments for just the two of you, keeping the dialogue open, and sometimes, just remembering why you fell for each other in the first place. Love needs to be nurtured, whether it's towards your children or your partner. ❤️ Let's keep those love fires burning!

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

That’s a sign of a good parent right there. Shitty ones will choose their partners over their kid and in extreme cases they’ll kick their kids out or just give them to their partners to use how they please and it’s gross.

[avery58]

Because it's their children. I wouldn't say some, most of them do. As they should.

Children become your biggest responsibility once you have them.

[DishLady]

It’s not MORE, it’s just different. That’s the precious, precious treasure you two made… your responsibility for life…

[OfMiceandMen]

I think it's because it's in our DNA to make sure we take care of them

[DrPepper12]

Natural instinct. The genes must be protected and expanded at all costs. Partner is expendable

[CrabCakes11]

Because they’re normal and functional? Who the fuck loves their partner more than their kids? That’s fucking crazy.

[Nikki1989]

Children are for life. Sadly, men come and go.

[RedInnocent69]

Because with children love is pure, innocent, and unconditional.

[jahaims]

Because you are supposed to

[Asker]

Why?