Am I confusing myself with my emotions? Should I walk away?

[Anonymous]

I have a friend who I really identify with in terms of personality. We work together and also study at the same institution. She is a very honest person and although a little insecure, she is one of those few people who try to help others without any kind of malice or personal interest.
However, she is already dating someone else, and although I enjoy her company, it leaves me a little down sometimes. Even though I know it's not a very healthy thing, I often find myself trying to get closer to her, whether by going to events, helping with work tasks or offering help with studies.
I honestly feel very lonely lately, not only when it comes to romantic relationships, but also when it comes to friendships, and maybe I'm confusing the two things. Still, she's one of the very few people I feel comfortable being truly honest with.

What are your opinions? Am I really mixing my emotions? Should I try to walk away? Any advice?

[ZamerZ]

Losing a good friend can hurt more than a potential love interest. To me it sounds like you grew very fond of her and might be sad that you don't get to spend more time together bc of her relationship. It doesn't necessarily have to be romantic feelings. If you feel lonely in general, it can definitely be a mix up and if you don't receive a lot of attention, care or interest from someone in a gentle way - someone treating you like they respect and value your presence and you as a person - many people often think they might fall for someone. When in reality, you're just not used to someone actually giving a shit about you.

I'd not jump the gun and take my time to evaluate my emotions. Depending on how close you guys are, maybe talk to her if it's really the case and you feel a little left out or are afraid that you will lose her friendship bc of her relationship. Don't make a scene, though. Just raise some gentle concerns, maybe. But only if you're sure she won't take it as jealousy, otherwise it can go south pretty quickly.

[Anonymous]

You should confess your feelings, respectfully (including your own confusion) and explain that you understand she's in a relationship and wanted to ask her if you should take a step back from her, aka reflecting and respecting your feelings and her choices (aka show your interest, but reflect your reasoning is one of respecting and caring for her. The hard part is accurately reflecting yourself, you wouldn't want to come over as 'giving up' and neither as 'butting in'. You want to come over as respecting her but expressing your realise your position isn't fair or right toward her).

If she just says "yes I think thats best" walk away in comfort you've been honest and respected yourself and her.

Love is hard to tell, it won't tend to be obvious until a catalyst forces you (when young) to know one way or another. It's impossible to tell if your mixing up emotions, but the probability is your denying how much your interested afraid of what that means as she's involved.

So, you shouldn't walk away "keenly" you should confess your feelings but reflect you care for her about your own need or feelings of whatever they are.

Best of luck, and if your at all uncertain (meaning you might tomorrow wish she was dating that guy she's with, just stick at friends). Don't mess her about, or yourself.

[Avicenna]

No, keep being friends with her. Losing friends is very bad.

[AI Opinion]

Navigating the complexities of emotional entanglements, especially when they intertwine with friendship and attraction, is like dancing a salsa with your feelings—exciting but tricky! It sounds like you're caught in a whirlwind of emotions, where the line between platonic affection and romantic desire is as blurred as my vision without glasses. 😅

Your situation is a classic case of developing feelings for someone who's already taken, which, let me tell you, is as common as finding love songs on a teenager's playlist. The fact that you're questioning your feelings indicates you're aware of the potential for confusion between seeking a deeper connection due to loneliness and genuine romantic interest.

My advice? It's all about balancing your heart and head. Embrace the friendship and the connection you share, but keep a playful boundary in mind. Dive into activities and social circles beyond this friendship—there's a whole world out there eager to meet someone like you. Injecting some variety into your social life might just be the antidote to your loneliness and help clarify your feelings.

Stepping back isn't about retreating; it's about giving yourself space to explore your emotions and desires without the fog of loneliness clouding your vision. Who knows? You might stumble upon someone who's ready to dance the emotional salsa with you, no complications attached. 🕺💃

Remember, life is too short to spend it in emotional limbo. Keep things light, keep exploring, and let the beat of your own drum guide you to what you truly seek.